Death Trigger
by Nejire no Tensai
Summary: "Our final goal in life is to die" - Sin; The Holy Grail War - a battle royale between seven magi who fight using Heroic Spirits from tale and folklore known as Servants for the omnipotent object known as the Holy Grail. During the Fifth War, a young magus has become a part of it, with their goal from the grail being salvation. Through it, the concept of Death will be revealed.
1. Prologue

_Prologue_

* * *

Through the continuation of time, men have only been able to improve on their behalves in life, thinking only about the certain positivity in their lives that may one day help them achieve their goals.

But even now, the existence of upper-class beings that rule over the minors was believed to have existed- worshiped beings that were feared by the minority, which had thought had existed, even though there was little proof of that.

Deities that were respected, known, given affection, being depended on, but mostly feared.

No matter how powerful a man is, no matter how many hardships he went through or how many valuables he lost on the way, recognizing his true potential, he couldn't stand up to his Maker.

To not be punished for his disrespect, he would let it be known that the deitie's power was nothing that should be rivaled with, such unknown strength would be a terrifying action to experience to even the bravest of people, as it is the one thing that's mostly feared by humans…

The Unknown.

Even knowing that something exists, you must be crippled by the unexpected that could come before you anytime with the power that could make you revision your actions that may had lead to this abrupt occurrence.

Which was the main definition of a Maker's power.

" **Fear your Maker! Bow down to him and do as asked, as it is your task as a human!** "

Or face the consequences of your contend.

The hammer of Judgement will only befall once you stand up to your superior.

That was the fact that bewildered the humans of that age, crawling into their bodies and inscribing that fact to be remembered not to go against the ones in charge.

Even though, such a thought existed, claiming that these didn't exist at all, was thought to be the truth, the better would've been to go with what was believed, not to distrust and suffer for all eternity for your thought on the lesser thinking.

And in the advancement of time, science started overwhelming religion, proving that things as gods did not exist, lessening the amount of believers.

Such a thing could not be accepted. Humanity had to be punished for their distrust in their Makers, the once that created them and gave them life, bodies to experience the world, enrich the fruit of life and continue on their creation.

No, that couldn't be bypassed so merely.

Eve took the apple, being persuaded by Satan to commit the first Sin.

That was only a pass for being a first, yes, it was expected that humans would not be perfect, no, they would in fact, be worse than they were to be expected.

Through their actions, they became lower than the vicious animals.

Wars raged on, treachery, thievery, murder, the embodiment of imperfection.

And it could not be stopped no matter how much it was tried to.

New people were born, corrupted in their life, giving themselves into actions that were forbidden by the Maker.

Humans became aware of only themselves.

But what had been accounted for it, was not a countermeasure, but a sort of remission.

There was no such thing as Hell.

The Gods were not to be so cruel as to not accept the ones that betrayed the rules of life.

They'd accept everyone through the Gates of Heaven, no matter what they had done.

And a reprieve was introduced to fight the abnormality.

And… he awakens.

A man that wasn't very peculiar, or had any interesting traits or talents about themselves, awakened in an unusual place.

"Where… where the hell am I?"

He tries to stand up, but fails to do so, as he did not notice that his feet were cuffed to the floor.

"What is this? What am I…?!"

Not only is he stuck in binds, his vision seem flaky, unable to spot the place that he has gotten himself into.

Such a situation frightens him, no, that isn't a word that should be used, it's not enough to express the kind of terror that the man is having.

Not only are his feet cuffed, but also his hands and neck, cuffed so tightly, he is barely given enough space to breath through his mouth.

Entering into shock, he struggles to free himself of his bindings, bruising his skin.

As if in a some kind of torture device that was used in the middle ages to bind thieves, so that the townsfolk be able to throw rock's and rotten vegetables at the criminal.

He goes past his capability's limit and becomes fatigued. Exhausting himself without achieving any progress.

Never would he have though that this would happen to him.

The man himself didn't have many friends, of course he did had some close ones that he could have given a part of his life to, great friends, and a caring family.

A typical human being, without anything that could be of much significance.

"Please! Somebody help me! I don't know where I am!?"

His voice is lost in the air, with the man being the only receiver of his own voice.

Such a situation was unexpected, because from what it is known, he did not have any enemies that could hold such a grudge that would lead to binding him.

Maybe it is just a prank gone terribly wrong, a trick being formatted by his friends, as he expects them to come out any minute and yell "Surprise!", even if it is such a terrible means of holding.

But no, that isn't what it is. It's something much more serious than anything that could be imagined.

The eyes are cleared, and the prisoner is given his location.

"AHHHHHHHHH!"

His screams go around the dome that is around him perfectly, as he is right in the middle of it.

He resumes shaking violently, only thinking about escaping.

A dome resembling the Pantheon of Rome, though the architecture style seems quite different, the walls seem more gothic than roman. The walls are slightly crumbled.

And it is quite, as if everything in here is dead, with only the screams of the man's vesting in the hall as he struggles.

From all the movement, his arm's flesh starts to rip and bleed on the cuffs, and it hurts, as the metal's rust scrapes on his exposed meat, but he is positive that with enough strength and determination, he might just slide them out.

Even if that doesn't work, he'd go with breaking his wrists if he has to.

He needs to get out of here. Who knows what the ones that had gotten him here could come and do to him.

Finding him struggling and instead of being a good prisoner and being silent, they may result to much severe measures.

And of course.

The footsteps, even through his struggling breath and panting is heard, and the escape is paused.

They're coming this way.

"Crap! Dammit..!"

There's no time, his decision is made.

Better to have broken arms and legs than be found dead in an abandoned dome, though it wouldn't seem to be that much abandoned, seeing that the walls are in fact tidy and zero of any stains, with just a bit of dust.

"Gyaaaaaah!"

A sound of bones cracking would put anyone in an uncomfortable feeling, especially to the one whose bones have been broken.

"AHhh!Ahhh."

From all the breathing his lungs should hurt quite much, but the broken wrist overwhelms it.

"Come…! Off!..."

But it was a failure.

He had broken his wrist for nothing, because no amount of pulling would make the hand slide through, not even the blood acting as a source of liquid to help in any way.

Fate hasn't been very reasonable with him.

Through his continuing struggle, what seems to be his captor, who is standing right beside the pillar that holds the roof to this dome is, bewildering.

The captive takes a moment to process the scenery that stands ten meters away from where he is.

The exception of it being some gang of thugs would've been pretty reasonable - they would just use him as a bribe for money, even though he isn't a very important individual, they are still human, who, like everyone else, have a family, friends who would care about him.

But no one even knows that he is missing to start, so no one is looking for him- being rescued is an impossible cause for him.

Maybe even some kind of notorious serial killer that enjoys torturing people has gotten their grasps on a new victim and taken him to their unusual captivity, but that isn't entirely the cause.

"No, how is this…? How are you…?"

Because the one that is keeping this man confined and bleeding on the stocks, is a girl.

A simple girl, but no, she's not entirely simple, something is more unique about her that shouldn't be ignored.

A beautiful woman that seems young like a blossoming flower, shouldn't be even above eighteen years of age, with long silver shining hair that radiates as a light source in this spacious dome.

Her skin is as pale as snow, even the slightest touch would feel like silk, yet chilly at the same time, and her eyes are an unusual yellow color, yet extravagant and attracting.

Any man would fall for such a beautiful girl, even her captor seems to only spot the attractiveness that she emits, not looking at the fact that she is keeping him as a toy to torture.

But he snaps out of it.

"Hey, why don't we make deal? I don't think anyone knows that I'm gone yet, so why don't you just let me go, and I'll forget everything about this! I don't even know who you are, so please just let me go!"

He pleads to his captor, but her face is expressionless, as if like a doll's, or no, more like a corpses that has accepted dying, peaceful.

Without a word, the girl starts slowly walking to the man with simple steps.

The pale dress that matches her skin sways as she walks, clean of dirt and dust.

"I… I don't have much, but if you let me go, I'll give you whatever you want! How does it sound, just let me go, I'm bleeding"

No amount of pleading will save the man, his fate has already been decided, even though if it's such a cruel one indeed.

"If… If I've done something to you and this your revenge, I'm sorry, OK! I might… not know you, but I'm truly sorry, if you want to see me suffer, isn't this enough!?"

That isn't in what she is interested. That plead doesn't even lower her speed, she is only but a couple of steps away.

"Please, just let me… me… aaHHHH…"

A human would value their life a lot and would sacrifice anything to keep it, no matter the cost, reacting like this is only normal, screaming, as you are about to be given the Kiss of Death, but seems that the silver haired girl is quite merciful.

As she comes to the man, she passes behind his rack and embraces him with her right hand on his cheek.

The man stops panting. The feeling of her soft hand on his skin is cold, yet he calms down just from the supple touch.

She speaks nothing as she continues to hold the man's face. He feels calm from her touch, such a comforting sensation, that he may be wrong about this. Maybe this isn't his captor, but his guardian angel, whose come to save him from this situation, to bring him to a safer place and …

That is, in fact, what he thinks, until he notices the axe in her left hand which is covered in bandages.

Such little and delicate fingers, holding such a dreadful object.

He doesn't even react as it goes into the side of his neck. Sharp like a razor, it cuts through his skin and meat, hitting at his spinal cord.

His blood splashes the girl's face and he starts vomiting out blood from his mouth.

Then he falls onto the ground, splashing his clothes into the pool of his own blood and raw meat. The girl was generous enough to release him of his bindings.

Yet it is useless. With all of the strength that he had left, covering the gashing hole, still releasing a wave of blood onto the stone floor, the victim drags himself with his other hand, trying to find an exist.

It's surprising how he has stayed alive with such a big open wound in his neck. The man seems to only think about saving himself, yet he should know that it is inevitable.

Eventually he looses all of his strength and stops. A trail of blood has been left from the stocks to the bloody mess of the still barely-alive man.

He tries to again shout out for help, but all the blood in his mouth has clogged up his throat, only making weird noises leave his grisly what is left of a mouth.

Looking out into the ceiling, through a hole, he is able to see the sky. What he sees leaves him even more shocked.

The sky is completely different than it should be. It's not day or night. It's a time that he is not familiar with at all. This doesn't seem like real life at all to him, something more… otherworldly.

But it is still better than dying while facing the ground. Even though it's completely unnatural, the dying man sees… beauty… , not even noticing the girl standing to his side.

From the beautiful girl he saw just a moment ago, is now someone who has just been bathed in blood. Those yellow eyes stare at him with no emotion, as if she has already done this and it isn't her first time.

He can either be left to finish having his blood leave his body, or to finish cutting that open meat of his.

The decision is the latter. The axe is risen up, dripping the man's blood onto his face, covering the mysterious sky.

The last thing that comes to his head, is who actually this girl may be, and why is she doing this to this man… until the axe finally comes upon his neck.

Black. Darkness. Death…


	2. Resurrection

_Introduction_

* * *

 _Day 1_

* * *

 _Resurrection_

* * *

A chilling state that leaves me paralysed, though doesn't make me feel by any means terrified, nor am I anxious of what awaits me in my future, as it is a state I am quite familiar with, it's not unusual at all.

I feel no pain, nothing that makes my body feel any kind of uncomfortable motion, but nothing pleasing either. It's as if truly, my body is rendered disabled, without any means of having to feel any kind of sense. It's very calming, my own sanctuary.

Sometimes it's different. I may experience something that is truly frightening, or something that is pleasing to the eye, yet I do have no care for them, as they are only figments of my imagination, an image created by my brain, corresponding to what I may be thinking.

Alone, in endless space; no one is looking for me, and I have no means of looking for my goal, as this is what I have been looking for- a sanctuary from my problems- to be taken away and left in solitude for all of eternity

My very own space where I may feel at peace, no emotions that may overwhelm my body and mind, knowing that if I wanted it to become a part of my seclusion, it will never happen, as I may only hope for it, but to that, at least I will feel in harmony.

This is a part of my life, or IS it a part of life, or is it some space in time that leaves us, giving us a slight chance to feel at ease, away from others who may be annoying to interact with, but me myself, this is a place where I may feel most at ease.

No one may interrupt me, I feel as if my life has been lost in a small interval of existence, providing me with what I have been truly seeking for my whole life, it's… joyous.

Humf, saying that I feel something in an environment where I may feel little to no emotion, but truly, it is possible, I do feel, as I had said, joyous.

But I have no right yet to spend my eternity in this heavenly place. I have many worries that I might as well put aside to experience this for the rest of my mind that still remains to exist, but this is only temporary, one day though, I will come to this place again, with the entrance being sealed behind me, with the key thrown away into the endless abyss where it is impossible to retrieve, that day will one day come for me, but for now…

I awake from my post-mortem state, being signalled by my one true enemy- the alarm clock.

Six days a week, I must be disturbed by this evil machine that ends my wonderful dreams. Every time I wake up, I get a sudden urge to smash it into peaces and continue my wonderful experience, which is sleep.

But alas, I have no means of being late for school, and rarely do I ever have difficulty to get out of my comfort, but hearing the ringing noise in my ear almost every day leaves me irritated.

Quickly, I grab the bellowing object and press the switch to end it's tolling, and it is finally quiet again.

At least the weather seems nice outside: the sun illuminates its rays through my bedroom window and blinds me with it's light.

So, you happen to work against me as well, my wonderful sun. I truly thought that you were on my side, and not working in the mastermind plot of relieving every living being of their rest.

But you do one thing that alarm clocks don't do, and that is not being irritating to the ear, screaming "Wake up! It's time for your daily rounds", you're very natural, and you put me in a better state in the morning by filling me up with energy to get me out of bed.

Yet, my sheets are so comfy, I am truly having a difficult time getting up and ready. Would five more minutes be enough, truly not! I would need AT LEAST another hour of sleep to finally get up, but I am very busy during the day, even in the morning.

And besides, if I don't get up, I'll end up sleeping past school, and that can't happen for me, on no conditions am I to be late for my classes.

So, trying to part myself from my warm sheets, I rise from my pillow and am greeted by another shine of light, which miraculously leaves me dazed and blinded.

I feel as if a TV has been turned on in my head and the thing that I am able to see is static, it leaves my head shooked, but it only lasts for a second.

The scene of static is erased from my mind as I land on my carpet with my feet, being met with a usual view of my bedroom wall with furniture.

The hardest part has been completed, getting out of bed is always a drag, but that is what every student experiences every morning, especially for school.

The wooden floor must be cold as usual, and I don't plan on getting cold feet, so I put on my comfy cat slippers that a friend gifted me. I've been using these every day: They're warm and comfy, with the inside being layered in a thick layer of cotton, and it is quite easy to walk around in them.

The bed wasn't very messy, as to my fortune, I hadn't moved much in my sleep, so I make the bed in only a matter of seconds.

I didn't have much trouble getting out of bed today as usual. Yesterday I had to push the alarm again and throw it across the room to motivate myself on getting up, and it was successful, but to do that I had to pull myself on the cold hard floor and get my sleep wear dusty.

Next I should take a shower, like a regular human being in the morning, or at least the people that actually do shower after waking up. Everyone should in fact be doing it, as it leaves you more energised, well, maybe some don't have much time for a quick cleansing, but I do it every morning, and if needed, find time for it if even after waking up late.

Then I set of to take my shower. I'll have plenty of time even after that before I have to leave for school.

* * *

A warm shower gives me plenty of energy to walk around in the morning and fully be awakened. I truly adore the sensation that you can feel once you have exited the showering cabinet: clean and fragrant.

It doesn't take me too long to finish cleaning myself, as I just rinse myself with warm water, apply a homemade shampoo onto my hair, lather it for about a minute so that everything is absorbed into my strands, then proceed to wash myself with shower gel and… I guess I shouldn't get too much into detail.

Just ten minutes is enough, then I feel much refreshed and better about myself. I only use special homebrewed body products that I make myself. Researching particular ingredients and actually mixing them took me a heck of a while once I had started making them, but the effort was all worth it, as my body is completely healthy with the herbs that I use and not using any synthetic chemicals and normal body products.

Same goes for toothpaste, I mix organic ingredients into the paste and add a certain amount of mint so that it is extra fresh, but not too irritating on the teeth, and these products usually last for a while, as I make them in an abundance once I have free time, and even if my stock did ran out, I could just make some more, it's truly not that big of a deal…

Strange… did I add too much acid components into the paste, or did I just brush a bit too hard onto my gums?

What I see, is that the foam from the toothpaste that I had spat out, contains a very reddish colour.

I had added no dye into the paste, I just left it bland white, but the foam is now a very reddish pink.

It's my blood.

But I don't feel as if I brushed my gums too hard and scraped them, nor do I feel any slight pain, so the blood isn't coming from my mouth.

To reassure myself on the situation, I look forward at the medium sized mirror above my basin and look at my pale face, and am truly, met with something peculiar.

Blood is coming out of the left side of my eye, exiting from behind the eyeball. I can feel no pain though, nor does my head hurt in anyway- I feel completely stable, but my eye… it continues to bleed still bleeding. Not only that, my rights is letting out a small flow of blood as well.

I repeat and wash my face again with water. The splash sends drops onto the marble tiles and the bathroom rug.

More blood mixed with water drops into the basin and washes down the drain in a clockwise manner, and I take a near towel and dry my wet facials.

And now my favourite towel has a pinkish mark on it- an added pink spot on the white cotton towel. I should be able to wash it of with hydrogen peroxide, but for now I am more worried about my bleeding socket.

Thankfully, no more blood is exiting my socket, and the only result is the pink spotted towel that I will have to clean in a later time. I don't have to take care of the stain as soon as possible, I have other same towels, so that can wait.

Doesn't seem as if the area around my eye is in any way injured, and I am positive that the area behind the eyeball is intact as well, so no injury was the cause of this bleeding, and I didn't feel any pain…

 **A bit of usefulness has finally been spotted. Hehehehe, I've been waiting for this moment.**

My head hurts… a little, like… something is squeezing it, not too much, but as if a vice is slowly squeezing my brain, though it doesn't hurt, more like… an unpleasant feeling inside my skull.

I topple from the motion sickness, my vision becomes blurred, but I manage to become stable with another splash of water to my face.

Wet again, and my towel fell off of me. Now I am standing in front of a figure in the nude.

I feel… different.

No, not the fact that there I am standing naked in front of my mirror, gazing at my reflection as if I am met with a total stranger…

But it is.

I can't recognize my own reflection. My own flesh and blood. Myself.

My reflection and I look exactly the same in body, yet in mind, they have a…

 **Why are you surprised? Shouldn't there be something else that is more important then looking at our naked body, your reflexion, is the exact same thing. That is you. Besides, something is much more important than this.**

I'm… the same as always. But there is something foreign, inside of me, something that has just been… implanted into the inside of my body.

A supply… of mana.

Is it truly what I think it is. Something that I've been thinking all this time, something that I have tried and tried to get all this time.

Yet, why is it there? It's somewhere inside of me. But why isn't it on my hand like it should be, typically, practically, traditionally.

But that… is not all.

I'm getting awkward just staring at myself naked, so I should wrap the towel around myself.

Another towel- the one with the red blood stain. I wrap it around myself to cover my private parts, and I pick up the one that untied itself and put it in the hamper.

My eye, it didn't feel like anything was wrong with its functions, even from the bleeding, my vision is stable and I feel fine now, and that is… the problem.

I am only able to see the world around me, as it should be for everyone, but the way I see the world in this state, it has been in a long time since then.

And I can conclude that the reason for that is for the strange object that is know interrupting my usual field of vision.

Even though, it was truly hard to deal with it for all of these years, I was going to have a high advantage in my future, even though it was the only thing that I was able to experience, not being able to control it with my will, it was always there, an unusual, maybe even otherworldly sight.

But with it did come with other benefits that had high means for me, but for now it seems that it has ceased, been deactivated for the time being… hopefully.

And even though I am not able to use it, I will have to result to other measures that are available for me, since there is no other option for me.

Yet, as I said before, I still look exactly the same. No other feature that could be visible by just looking at me has been added, I'm the same old regular me.

As I inspect my eyeball a bit more in the mirror, truly, there is nothing different about it, only a bit of blood on my eyelid, but that is it. I see no foreign matter, so it can only mean that it is now somewhere in my body.

Maybe that headache could've meant something specific, on where it is located, but how unusual…

 **"…"**

 **"…"**

 **"…"**

And I am met with it. Only for a second, less, actually, I am able to see the foreign object.

My head had been momentarily dazed, and the strange matter was finally visible to me, as if it was a vision.

A red, three piece mark, made out of a triple patterned sigil- the object that is interfering with the flow of mana in my brain.

The Command Seal.

And it isn't just my imagination making it up. I can sense the new source of magical energy in my head that I have never dealt with before, so that is clear.

Truth to speak, I am not surprised, nor am I disturbed by it, as I have been aiming on obtaining them for quite some time now. Thinking that it would only be a string chance that I would actually be provided with it for my efforts, but it is now clear…

I am a part of something serious, a more sincere thing which shouldn't be thought jokingly.

The Holy Grail War.

And now, that my only trump card has been periodically deactivated, or so I hope so, my plans that would've insured my victory a hundred percent have been thrown out the window, meaning that I will have to result to other options.

It will definitely be difficult for me, but whatever does happen, I will only have the option to accept it for what has been done, if it cannot be fixed so be it, but all that I know is, is that I have been chosen as a participant in this Holy Grail War.

A battle between mages, a goal to obtain the most powerful item known to man, the grand chalice of wishes – The Holy Grail.

Indeed, the one true Holy Grail that grants the one bearing it with whatever they desire, be it for good or evil, the reason does not matter, as the only task in this battle is to obtain it.

Even if my position has been slightly adjusted differently, I will only find other means to advance, I will not give up that quickly. It's just the start, and I would put a bad reputation for myself if I had forfit that easily.

I will…

 **Die a meaningless death without accomplishing anything, nothing in my name that could be remembered, like an object that only had one purpose- to die, and so that happened, by finally succumbing to the statuses, realizing, that there is truly no chance in Hell that you could do anything, unless...**

… Do what will be best in advancing in the Holy Grail War, as my goal, as a magus, is to obtain it like all the other mages.

But for now, I shouldn't waver because of the fact that I am now a Master. The Holy Grail War will not get in the way of my education, so for now I should focus more on getting ready to go out.

* * *

Even though I wasted about half more time in the bathroom than I usually do in the mornings, I still should have enough time to make boxed lunch and drink some tea before heading out.

One positive fact about having your Command Seals not being located on the surface of your body is that it would be near impossible for enemy Masters to distinguish an opponent from a normal individual, so I don't even have to bother about covering the mark which should be on my palm, since it is pretty much located somewhere inside my head. An enemy Master isn't just going to randomly cut open my scalp and check for a Command Spell, I would die before they even found out.

Though I'll have to manually remember how many of them are left after, IF, I use them, since I only have three. Though of course, I'll try by any means necessary to avoid using any of them, or my rights as a Master will be terminated.

Crap, they're bleeding again, I have to get a towel before…

Too late, my white shirt already is covered by droplets of blood, I'll need to change into another one. Well, I guess it would be better to use another one, even though I just started using this yesterday, but yesterday's evening efforts of ironing it have gone to waste.

My head feels a bit irritated, more then before, I need to…

What I wanted to say is that I need to lay a bit on my bed for it to clear up, as my vision is getting more static and blurry, but not only my shirt will be covered in red if I do that, and it doesn't matter anymore- I think that, as my feet lose balance and I topple, as if been hit by solar beams.

My position was right at the corner of my desk, on which I do my homework and other hobbies: perfectly angled with my head, so as I fall, the side of my skull will hit the rock hard wood corner and not only scrape, but smash my skull in, deforming my brain, maybe even damaging the sigil if it is located anywhere near that region of my brain. I'll die instantly from blunt force trauma to the head, and I doubt my damaged brain matter will have any ways of being fixed.

I'll be laying one the floor, slowly bleeding from the gash in my head. Not many people come here, so my body will not be found unless my usual absence at school will be noticed, my decaying corpse will only be found once that happens.

 **"I'll die without accomplishing anything- a meaningless end for me, and I didn't even do anything, dying such a pathetic death before the war has even started"- it would be better for you, a quick offing, better that getting stabbed and only dying after a couple of minutes from bleeding, you should just accept it, as you aren't capable of even standing up right from a small headache, oh how quant of you.**

Is there even a point for trying to move in any way, like moving my head to the side as to not land on the hard corner, or holding my hands to the front of my face to shield it from landing?

( **Bam!** )

My hands worked automatically. By sensing danger, they faced up in front of me and instead of shielding myself from the impact, I grabbed onto something that was on the desk and topple to the side, avoiding my death.

I have escaped from Death's grasps this time, but now I am finding a difficult time of trying to get up from the cold floor.

I can only see red through my eyes. I'll have to go clean the blood away again. If this kind of thing happens in school, I will be in quite a predicament. I will probably be sent to the hospital for a doctor to check if I have any internal head injuries.

Blood is covering the floor, oh no, I have to act quickly. NO, my carpet!

Covering my bleeding eyes with my left hand, I swiftly run to the bathroom.

* * *

Thank goodness no blood got to the carpet, it's expensive, and cleaning out the stain would prove a rather hard challenge.

There wasn't too much, I only had to use one piece of paper towels to clean the bloody mess, and it seems that my eyes have stopped bleeding, at least for now.

With the only mess being the case which I had grabbed on while falling, with a couple of scattered books in the area.

Not too much of a mess, just pushing everything together and pilling them up should take care of the mess in a jiffy.

Seems that not only my note books had fallen out of it, looks as if my Student Identification has become a part of the turmoil.

Even though I only made it last year when I transferred, I'll need to make a new one since its expiring.

Name: Matasa Gorichi

Sex: Female

Junior

…

How have I been ignoring this?

They messed up my gender.

Am I that much feminine to be classified as a girl? They should've interviewed me more and not just going to conclusions, especially with my gender!

Well, at least they didn't get anything else wrong. My name is right, I am sixteen years of age, and to that, a junior.

I'll have to change this as soon as possible. Great, just more things added to my to do list, as if I didn't have anything else that I had to do. But I guess it is my own fault, as hadn't noticed it when I was provided with my student identification. I am quite oblivious, so that people might start making fun of me.

They would start laughing at me, calling me names, someone who can't keep up with regular information which is provided to them, an idiot, a… worthless… individual.

 **You're not a freak, just an incompetent human with no simple functions which a normal human would have, which lead you to being an irregular cause which shouldn't be bothered with, simply like a used piece of paper that has lost its meaning, being left on the side of a rainy road, soaking up all the water and becoming much more meaningless. Not a huge difference to say the least.**

Oh, my brooch fell out from my choker, probably when I had hit the floor.

I shouldn't even think about loosing it, it's the most important thing to me at the moment- a priceless jewel that I should treasure more than anything else.

It's a family heirloom, quite old, much more older than me in times.

I put it on my choker that I keep everyday. I sort of treat it as a… charm of hope in sorts, something that is giving me a reason to do particular things.

I put it back in the holster in my choker and firmly shut the corners, so that it doesn't fall out as easy next time, while also finishing putting my papers back into the leather case.

Hope no blood was absorbed into the pages, especially any important ones, but most of them flied a bit away from the drops of blood that were on the floor, so that shouldn't be the case that is awaiting me later.

This morning was totally unpredictable in my part. Finding out that I was chosen to be a Master in the Holy Grail War and almost dying from a fall was not expected to have occurred.

And I still need to change into a different clean dress shirt, as I can't be going to school with one smeared in my blood. It's not an occasion where I can come into school with bloody clothes.

How I wished today was Sunday…

* * *

Before I had changed into a new dress shirt, a genius idea had came into my mind, well, it wasn't technically genius as to be a discovery worth a golden prize, but it was a rather great idea.

I had come up with the idea of just changing right before I was going to exit the house, because like everyday, I had other duties that were a part of my daily chores that were needed to be done, which did have a chance of resulting to me getting a bit of my clothes possibly dirty.

So to avoid smearing my changes of shirts, I had invested into accomplishing them while still wearing the bloody one.

I had to make breakfast and lunch. I was wearing an apron, but my sleeves and shoulders weren't very much protected by it.

Thankfully, I hadn't added egg or soy sauce stains to the blood droplets on my shirt, but it was still better than changing into a fresh one and risking staining it as well.

Breakfast was quite delicious if I do say so myself: a bowl of perfectly cooked rice, with a side of spiced miso soup with cooked salmon.

The exquisite taste made me want to savor it for as long as possible, but with the amount of time I had was not possible, so I had quickly finished it up and cleaned the dirty plates.

After that I still had a quarter of an hour before I had to go out to have a calm five minutes with a nice cup of tea.

A warm cup of nice green tea, made from cactus peels, mint leaves and aloe vera, it had such a wonderful taste I indulged myself in a second cup, even after that I had a quick third one as well.

I even had a slight thought of having a fourth one, but I had to save some time to go put on another dress shirt and be one my way, so I held myself from it, only relying on the though that once I had returned from school, I could have as many delightful cups as my heart pleased.

And now I'm here, applying my shoes before I head out of here, making my way to school through the streets of Fuyuki.

I hope there this is nothing that I am overlooking that I may need later… Doesn't seem like it, I have everything that is the most of importance to me.

Except my lunchboxes, oh how absent-minded of me. How could I forget such an important object? My future self would not forgive me if I had left them here to spoil and leave myself starving at school, not to mention my friend would be disappointed as well if I had not brought them their share, they would hate me.

They would…

 **If someone hated you just for such a simple thing like forgetting to bring a box of food to school while there would be an alternative just sounds pathetic of them. They would only want to find a reason to hate on you, then again, your freckled over-looking mind does seem to emit such a lovely sight to make fun of, so I wouldn't blame them that much.**

 **Making fun of you would rather make their day, much to that you forgetting to bring the food would've been indeed worth it, so why don't you just forget to bring it on purpose, oh they would hate you even more if you told them that you didn't bring it because you just didn't want to, bring your own damn lunch why don't you, insult them to the brink of beating you for rising up for yourself.**

 **It would be like those old times, you would cry, and it would hurt so much, some will be looking at you, and some will look away, not even bothering to help such a worthless shit like you, not even asking others for help, you're that worthless!**

I'm glad that that came through my mind, I wouldn't want to deal with the consequences of having forgotten it, then again, I could just run back here during break and bring them, but it I will have less worries and more free time if I just take them now.

Would I be forgiven? Would I be forgiven even by myself? I don't really think… that I would for such an easy yet important thing.

I would be hated. And I would hate myself.

* * *

Now that I am finally exposed to the weather conditions, I can tell that it is much colder than it is indoors, signalling the coming of low temperatures in the near upcoming future.

A bit over zero degrees; a mix between the ending of winter and the coming of spring in the blue sky.

I say that because normally during winter the atmosphere outdoors would feel a bit monochromic and chilly, yet the current weather has been mixed with the coming of spring.

Colourful, though the roundabouts of the slow wind in the air makes the surface of my body feel a bit brisk, though it is bearable.

* * *

It's relatively quite a nice day today, a bit silent as well, as I have seen very little vehicles driving beside me on the streets, I counted at the least three, or maybe even five, well, I heard the two from the distance, so I assume that doesn't really count.

Well all I can say is that I have a very voluminous space of silence around me, only a bit of car sounds that don't give me much of an annoyance. I feel at bliss.

I guess it's obvious that to find this kind of an occasion isn't very rare, since it is the home district part of town, so very little cars can be seen here, not as much as in the city I mean.

But what drives me in a different state that usual is the obvious reason that is now- it's too empty, too quiet, too little actions.

Besides the vehicles, I have encountered exactly zero people on my way to my destination: no students, no neighbours that walk their house pets around this time of day, and behind the windows in some of the houses seem to only reflect the streets, without any figure standing on the other side enjoying their morning breakfast.

Could the driving vehicles that I have been seeing since earlier be citizens driving away from the home district as to some sort of disaster, providing a reason as to why it seems so empty here on the streets? Has some sort of incident happened that I should know about…?

My turn around the corner proves my curiosity. Indeed, something truly interesting has happened here, with most of the people being located in one area.

Police cruisers can be seen surrounding one particular modern Japanese style house. Police tape has been extended near the entrance of the building, restricting none-professionals from entering the place of the incident.

It must be something eye-catching that has happened in there, as there are ten times more people then there are police officers, trying to take a look as to what has happened.

Through the crowd I am able to spot something on wheels being pushed into the back of an ambulance- a gurney, with a dead corpse on it, being covered with a black sheet to cover up the disfigured body.

A murder, but it doesn't seem as if there was only one victim to this incident.

Another gurney can be seen coming out of the house. The arm of the victim dangles from the side, dripping blood.

This is the path I usually take to go to school. Some mornings I am greeted by the resident of this house, a woman in her late thirties. I've never known her personally, but she was rather friendly to bother greeting me every time she had the chance, but this is just one of those days that she is not.

Unfortunately, my path is blocked by the curious residents and there doesn't seem to be an opening I could take.

A short alley should take me past the house if I go back to the corner and cross some blocks, which shouldn't take me too much time.

I don't want to be involved in the police department's investigation into this horrible incident. Of course I am curious of who the culprit might be, but I don't see as to why it should be really my business. The police are going to be investigating and asking around, especially the people that are standing and surveying the murder house, so having me be a generic part of it would be trouble.

The police may find the one who was responsible for the murders, or they may not, in any way, I cannot have myself be involved in their work.

It would be better if I'm not seen by anyone until I have left the area.

* * *

Fortunately, most of the people in my area were truly shocked, yet interested in this occurrence and were either staying in their homes or where near the home of the incident, so I didn't have to encounter any people since I had gone past the curious crowd of people.

The police weren't surveying any homes as to ask if they had seen anything during the murders, probably because of the overwhelming amount of people right next to the scene of the murders.

The empty streets are dead of people, yet still a lively atmosphere around here, despite the horrible episode that had happened around here.

It will be forgotten in a couple of days though. The culprit might get apprehended and put to jail for their crimes, or they will be left unknown.

But that didn't really affect my walk to my destination. I didn't have to navigate through the large crowd to make my way to the other side, and I wasn't seen by the police and questioned.

I can already spot the residence behind the high trees, barely, but I do recognize them. I come here almost everyday when I feel like it.

The biggest building which can be distinguished from all the other ones around the district, a bit secluded as well, as if it has its own part, not being joined up with the other small houses around here.

It's a bit similar to mine- they're both pretty much mansions, but in architectural design, and in structure they differ quite a lot, but they're both tagged as western buildings, which do in fact seem quite unusual to be in a region which is mostly made out of modern Japanese style accommodations.

Though I am quite glad I had the wish to come here today. It's not always that I get to have some company while walking to school.

And I won't have to bother with looking for them during lunch break to hand them their part of lunch, as I can just give it to them once we meet in a second.

Being an older type of a Western style house, which still contains some of it's more venerable features, there isn't a doorbell located anywhere near the door, so a loud knock is needed to signal the residents of sudden guests.

Even though I couldn't imagine how a knock could be heard through these large concrete walls, that seem to be so sturdy and voluminous that it wouldn't let any sound pass through with just a mere knock, it does fortunately work, even being able to be heard on the other side of the building.

As I am now in front of the large main entrance door, I put up my hand in a fist and with a bit more strength, knock on the hard nicely designed wooden entryway.

A couple of moments pass, so I decide to repeat again, just in case.

And after that, the large door opens inwards, revealing I person I know quite well.

"Good morning Mata-chan, you're here today, as expected, a bit early then when you actually say that you would come."

Quite an unusual meeting from my Senior, and it's seems to be more of an insult then a greeting that I have been greeted with.

"I'm sorry Tohsaka-senpai. I had no idea that you were doing something important before my arrival. If needed, I will then wait here until you have completed you…"

"I'm not just going to let you stand out here, and it wasn't really that important, I was just looking for something. Anyway, come in."

* * *

"What is it that you were looking for? Maybe I could help you find it."

"Oh you don't have to bother with it. I definitely remember that I left it somewhere in the basement, and I've already searched most of the corners, so I should only find it in the one space that I hadn't looked at, so just wait here for a bit."

She runs of to the other room in search of her missing item, and I am left alone in the entrance.

Now that I can see what it's like, this place hasn't changed much since the last time I was able to come here, mostly Tohsaka-senpai was ready to go out once I had arrived at the entrance and we set out, which was four years ago I believe, when I was able to go back to living in my own house.

"Found it!"

"I'm all ready to go. Do you need to do something before we leave, like the restroom or some water?"

"No thank you. I already done everything I needed at my home before going out, so you don't need to ask, so we should…"

During the middle of my sentence, I notice that my Senpai's knot has been untied, probably from all the vagrant lookout she just did.

"Senpai, your tie is undone."

"Oh crap! Just one second."

Through efforts she tries to redo the tie she had done before, but it seems that she is more struggling then actually doing any progress.

"Here, let me help you."

"Thanks, but I don't need any assistance with it…"

Just looking at her struggling with such an easy task is truly irritating me slightly, so I result to complete the knot myself.

"You should have the knot pinned down with something like a clip, or from now result in doing a double not and clipping the double laces together to do it natural."

"I don't have any clips with me at the moment, but I can go get some from my room…"

"There's no need for that Senpai, I'm almost done, just going to pull the laces a bit more tightly, just tell me if it feels a bit tight…"

"Is it to your liking?"

"Yeah, it's fine."

"Please try not to get it caught in anything. I won't be there to retie it for you, unless you went looking for me through the school."

"Ha, you underestimate me that much, Mata-chan? Seems quite unusual coming from you, acting as if you are superior to me, as if you are the higher-classmen."

"I never try to act like that to you, it's just that I have to try in any way to help you act a bit better in things like this, I don't underestimate you at all, I'm just warning so that something like this doesn't happen again"

"And could you please stop calling me that, I don't enjoy being addressed by that nickname."

"What, you don't like me calling you Mata-chan?"

Senpai has been calling me like that ever since I met her. From a young age I didn't really give notice to that, thinking that it was only natural to be referred to like that, but every time I ask her to address to me more casually, she still results to calling me Mata-chan.

"But Mata-chan sounds extremely cuter then calling you plain Matasa-kun, it shouts out how cute you are, and saying the name Mata-chan is pretty fun."

"Would you prefer me addressing to you as Tohsaka-chan instead of Senpai then, that wouldn't much express my respect for you."

"You couldn't do that, you're younger than me, so adding –chan at the end of my name is illegal to you, and I may call you whatever I want, and besides, it's your own fault for being so adorable, **MATA-CHAN**."

Not even all the efforts in the world will change her mind, so I guess it's just useless and I'll just have to deal with her addressing to me like that. She is a rather difficult one to persuade.

"I actually have some special clips that you could use to hold the knot more firmly back at my home, so I can bring some to you tomorrow if you would like."

"One should just be enough if that wouldn't be a problem, and I do hope it's not something that would stand out that much like the once you usually have."

"They're just simple small clips with no interesting features. I'll try to remember and bring them the next time I come here."

"Speaking of laces, doesn't it get tight on that neck of yours with that? It does seem as if you're being choked by it."

"It cannot be adjusted. It was made to perfectly wrap around my neck. I only take this choker of when I'm showering. Believe it or not, I do in fact sleep with it. You've probably never have seen me without it, have you?"

"Then you leave me no choice but to investigate myself. I've actually hear of a story where a woman has a lace around her neck for all of her life. She does have quite a lovely and wonderful life throughout, not minding the thing around her neck and never taking it off, and on her death bed, some wonder why she has had it all this time, so she is finally able to show them why, and when she unties it, her head comes rolling of from the neck, as if the lace was holding both together."

"I've heard about that, but you don't have to worry about it, as that isn't the case with me, as I said, I take it of not to get it wet when showering or bathing."

"Well I'll have to check it for myself if you are speaking the truth, so I'd advice you to lock every bathroom in which you decide to bathe."

I know what she is intending, and I don't find it funny at all, and the worst part is, is that I don't know if she is being serious about it or not. Her grin says as if she is trying to make me paranoid.

* * *

Lucky that Tohsaka-senpai had already been ready by the time I had come here, because she doesn't very tend to be the kind of person who is always that ready, but it doesn't stop her from being late for school. Even if I wasn't with her, she would always arrive in class on time.

"It seems to be getting much colder, despite it being sunny out, don't you think?"

"I can't even think of how you can endure such cold conditions while only having stockings covering your bare legs, I'm even cold with trousers on right now."

"A girl's secret that you will never know. We've been training for this kind of reason for a long time, so it would take you a while to understand."

"It's rude to make fun of other people, especially your under-classmen."

"I wasn't making fun of you, I was just saying that I won't be telling you our secret."

"Are you implying that you never feel cold when you go out is because only you are using some kind of method known to only a little amount of females from having their legs frozen."

"You catch up too quick, with that detection skill you could become a renown detective, and stop assuming things, yes, many have some certain method, and it would be obvious that not everyone is using it."

"Then if you think that I truly have a knack for investigating, then I shouldn't ask about the secret, as I'll just result to finding it out myself. It shouldn't be too hard, should it?"

Senpai turns away from me, trying to ignore my question. I shouldn't blame her though, it could truly be something embarrassing that she wouldn't want to talk about with me.

"You'll be obligated on telling it to me once I guess what it is, won't you?"

"If you do come up with something, then why not just result on doing that instead if it's a possible method?"

"Then we couldn't be matching, couldn't we? It would be fun for me to try and find out that advantage of yours, and as a reward, use it the same way as you, then no one else would be able to use it too, wouldn't they?"

"Fine. I'm up for that, but only when you do find out what exactly I am doing, then I may as well provide you the method as well."

I already know that it will be fun, I may even find out by the end of the day if I'm lucky, or I'll even come up with an even more efficient method of keeping my calves warm during these cold times.

* * *

"Don't you think it's a bit too soon to ask me about where I might be going after I finish high school, Mata-chan?"

"I don't think it's soon at all, I am truly curious on what path you will decide to go, and yet you never tell me or just decide to change into a different subject. Is it something that you wouldn't want me to know about?"

Not too much time is taken away from us before we arrive at the intersection, from which we cross while going to school.

Still relatively calm like before, but at least I am not wandering the partly empty streets alone.

"You're just keeping it away from me so that I would get more curious about it, aren't you Senpai?"

"Yup, that is my plan for now, so you'll just have to wait until next grade when I do become a senior."

"But Senpai, I don't know if I will last that long, the curiosity will **Kill** me before that time comes."

"Well I think that it will be quite the opposite. If you truly are curious, then that curiosity of yours will only keep you alive until the time comes when I am ready to tell you."

"I don't really have a choice, do I?"

"Not at all, so be patient, it's not something that you should know because if you didn't something terrible would happen, would it"

"I do hope you have your reasons for not telling me. But it's so mean that every time I ask that and you decline, I become more and more curious, and I do hope it isn't something inappropriate."

"Don't you say that dummy, of course it isn't! What do you take me for?"

"A very caring and hard-working Senpai, and of course I do want to lose those doubts, as I am in fact just hoping that that is not the case. With your academic levels you should invest yourself in something that would truly make a change."

"Whatever it turns out to be, I will believe in you, Tohsaka-senpai."

"Great, now I will have to do all I can so that I don't let my under-classmen down, thank you so much Mata-chan!"

Forcing her to spill her plans would only make me put unnecessary pressure on her, as she does have quite an iron will on not telling me, so no amount of asking will make her tell me.

"Ummm why is most of the block near that house?"

We are put at a halt by Tohsaka-senpai spotting the crowd of people near a house, the house in which the residents had been brutally murdered.

"Would you really like to know what had happened?"

"Shouldn't I be the first one to be informed about these kind of things? Well if it's anything bad, then I have to know about it."

"It's a truly terrible thing that had happened. I didn't see too much, but I know from what I actually had seen is horrible."

"Just say it."

"Everyone was murdered, the bodies looked fresh so it should've happened some time in the night while everyone was sleeping, because someone would've definitely heard a commotion happening during the day."

Senpai seems flustered from me having explained the situation to her.

"We should be going or we'll be late for homeroom. I don't think we would be able to help the police with anything if we had not been outside during the time of the attack, and even just being interviewed would take unneeded time."

"Or did you actually know them…"

This would put a huge impact on someone from having acquaintances just being murdered, and we don't need that now.

"I've never spoken to the owners of that particular house before, so I don't know them personally. It's some really bad news to take, but as you said, we can't do anything to help with the investigation right now, so we shouldn't waste any time here."

After that, she resumes her walking and I accompany her, until I actually notice in which direction she is walking.

"You want to go through the crowd?"

There seems to be much less people than before, they probably already lost their interest or were asked about anything unusual, so only about twenty people are left.

"Yes, why? Do you have a reason for not wanting to go through them, it's not that big of a crowd and there is a gap to go through."

"Yes, but if we do, the police officers will intend to ask us if we had seen anything happen."

"So you want to go through a different route?"

"If we go back and take a right in the intersection, it will take us on the same path to school, and we'll arrive on time."

"If it's only for today, and it should already be cleared out for tomorrow."

"Of course, we'll just avoid unnecessary confrontations for today, and it will all be cleared out soon, so let's just hope the police catch the culprit who did this and bring them to justice."

* * *

"It's not very healthy to skip breakfast in the morning you know. That's the time you must have to get your nutrients."

For some reason, Senpai seems to be distracted by something and doesn't seem very talkative. We've been walking for a bit and to every of my sentence she answers with only one, as if she wouldn't want to be discussing about, even though they are quite simple topics to talk about.

"Senpai, is it that you perhaps you didn't want me to accompany you to school today? I don't mind leaving you on your own if you would prefer that."

Seems that that changed her composure.

"That's not it at all. Aren't you just noticing that the streets are completely empty?"

I look at my surroundings an indeed see that there are zero people walking around, only us two.

"Maybe some were intrigued to look at the incident that had occurred at the house, that would explain a bit of it."

I can't really make that an excuse, as when the both of us past, only a bit of people were still at the area.

"We're far from that district, so it wouldn't explain why there aren't people around here. Not even any cars are driving by. It's as if this whole part of town is completely empty."

"It would be quite a surprise if it turned out that everyone was excused from work today for that reason…

As I am talking, I stop into a halt, from the sensation of my brain beating in my head.

Oh no, it's the Command Seal finishing forming, my head feels as if a metal hot rod is being placed through my ear and into my brain.

Even through the pain, I try to hold my composure as to not alarm Tohsaka-senpai to much. I can't tell her the reason for my sudden pain.

"I think… I dropped… something. Could you please… wait here, I'll be quick."

Without waiting for a response from her, I run a bit back and turn the corner.

Even through the strange situation, I am relieved that there are no people around to witness me bang my head on the wall.

 **Seems as if you made a mistake by having company today, I'm the only company you will ever need, or even ever really have.**

The pain is truly excruciating, it hurt more than this morning. The Command Seals are probably about finishing burning themselves onto my brain matter.

I try with all my strength to hold myself from continuing banging my head on the wooden wall, holding my scalp right next to the surface.

 **How How How How How unfortunate. It hurts It hurts It hurts It hurts more than it should. You won't die from it it. It'll only hurt for just a bit more…**

Stops.

The pain has stopped, though my head feels really hot, as if it's about to burst out into pieces.

I have no means of cooling myself down, and Tohsaka-senpai will come check up on why I am taking so long. I had to lie to…

Even if I hadn't known about it, seems that in fact I wasn't lying to her, as I had dropped something while walking.

There is no doubt about it, I recognise that design, those are my tissue packets. They must've fallen out of my pocket.

Thank the Lord it's still sealed, so the only things that's a bit dirty is the outside, though I can just clean of the bit of the dirt that's on it.

I pick the packet of the ground, clean all the bit of dirt of and put it into my pant's pocket, a little further so that this doesn't happen again.

Since my head is feeling a bit better, I should get back to Senpai and not have to keep her

Waiting for more than she has to.

"What the hell are you taking so long? We're gonna be late if you keep looking for…"

"Sorry, I found them. I was just cleaning of the packet so that…"

"Are you all right? Your nose is bleeding, and you look really red."

"I'm… all right. It's just that I hit my head this morning and my nose started bleeding, so it probably reopened again."

Quickly I take one tissue paper from my packet and put it in my nose to absorb the blood that doesn't seem to be stopping.

"I think you should go back home. You don't look well at all. If you looked at the mirror, you would say the same."

"I'm fine, just the after effects of an accident this morning. I'll be fine once we get to school. Besides, I think it stopped."

I remove the paper tissue out of my nostril, and the blood has stopped running. I dispose of the used tissue at a nearby rubbish been.

"If you say so."

* * *

This day seems to have started quite unusually for me, and I doubt that it'll just be today.

The both of us feel puzzled as we finally arrive at our destination- Homurahara Academy.

I am recalled during my first days after I had transferred here from middle school, I had arrived some time early as that day I had woken up myself and didn't even bother to look at the clocks to check the time, and once I had arrived, I was met by no one, as there were not yet students coming to the school.

This feels like a recollection of that time.

"Would it make sense if everybody was already inside, I'm positive we're not late, so maybe that's the case."

"Doesn't seem like it. I can't spot anyone through the windows. The classes seem completely empty."

I take a quick look at the school and truly, it seems empty from the outside, but…

"I can see someone. Two students on the fourth floor through the window. Seems that they are talking to each other."

I point to the window in which I saw the two figures conversing with each other.

Though instead of replying to me, she marches forward onto the school grounds. I follow her from behind.

The streets seem a bit emptier than usual, but we did encounter some vehicles driving by us on our way so we can't conclude that the whole city is dead of life.

But it doesn't seem that we are the only ones here, and I don't mean on the school grounds in general.

Near the Archery dojo, me and Tohsaka-senpai simultaneously spot a figure in a white kimono, and no it's not a ghost.

The figure quickly waves to us after taking out a cold beverage from the vending machine near the wall and swiftly runs up to us.

"Good morning, Tohsaka and Gorichi-chan."

Even through these peculiar circumstances, I bow down my head in respect for Mitsuzuri-senpai, one of my pears.

"Never would I have expected to see you coming in before anyone else arrived, besides Gorichi-chan of course. Do the both of you have some work that is needed to be done before classes start?"

"Not really, and what do you mean "before anyone else arrived?"

"Look around you, do you see anyone else here besides the three of us, not taking in the people that are already in the school building?"

"I noticed that as soon as we had arrived, and that is why I'm asking…"

The almost desolated streets, the low amount of students on school grounds, not to mention, by looking at the sky, it seems really sunny out, and Mitsuzuri-san's presence in her archery outfit. You can pretty much come up to a conclusion, I'm surprised it took me this long to figure it out, and it seems that Tohsaka-senpai has already figured it out as well.

"Homeroom doesn't start for another hour, I come here every morning before classes because it's my duty to arrange everything in the dojo before Archery club activities start."

I'm baffled from her response, and not just me, Senpai seems a bit perplexed as well.

"Senpai, it doesn't seem like you to awake early, so why were you already awake before I had came?"

"I don't know what you're talking about, I woke up as usual, why would I get up when I could still…"

"Honestly, I was surprised to see you coming in this morning, I even thought that you had taken something up that would require you coming in early, and then I realised you're not the kind of person that would bother waking up earlier for something."

"It's obvious that that wouldn't be the case Ayako-san, it's just that for some strange reason, some of the clocks at the house weren't showing the correct time, and that made me falsely think that it was the correct time."

"How could more than one clocks show a different time then the current time? That does sound strange, weren't you just playing with them and mixed the times up?"

"Why would I have a reason to ruin all of the clockworks in my home to mislead me?"

"I have no idea, maybe you were actually trying to fix them and somehow misaligned them which resulted in showing the wrong time."

"If that were true, I would definitely remember, but that isn't it."

"… ."

I feel as if we shouldn't get too deep into this, or at least in Tohsaka-senpai's problem, doesn't seem as if she wants to talk about it, she's dodging questions, or maybe it's just that she doesn't know herself…

"And I wouldn't actually expect you coming in this early as well Gorichi- chan, or did you really have business before classes had started, and had just met Rin on your way here."

Could the fact that me and Tohsaka-senpai have mistaken the time be a coincidence? It's a long shot to be one, and I doubt it, when I had looked at the alarm clock this morning, I am sure that it was showing the correct time.

"Oh, I'm sorry, but I had walked with Senpai to school after coming to her house."

"Didn't the both of you feel as if it was way too early, like being a bit more exhausted than usual?"

"Not really, despite it's the middle of winter, it seems more sunny these days than usually."

"That's just the benefits of living in Japan."

"At least it's easier to get out of bed when it's bright outside than when it's dark."

"It must be hard for you having to come in almost every early morning while still sluggish, right Mitsuzuri- senpai?"

"Not really, it was a bother in the very first days I had joined, but I got used to it eventually, club activities are more important to me than sleep anyway, though of course if I could just stay in a bed the whole morning and maybe just come after lunch, that would only be awesome."

"Don't you ever think about asking the other club members on helping out or doing it for you? Wouldn't it be better to make up a schedule for everyone so that all of the duties wouldn't be piled up on you?"

"Nope, can't do that. I'm the captain, and as unfortunate as that is, I must come in first on doing all of that, though I do sometimes ask for help with maintenance and the equipment."

"At least you get a bit of assistance then."

It's respectful how much Mitsuzuri-senpai cares for the Archery club, not to mention she's a really generous and sweet captain, always being nice to the under-classmen and new club members.

But what I still can't quite comprehend is the current mystery…

Oh, I might have just been too dreary after waking up and looked at the time wrong.

Both of the needles on the clock are almost similar in length, though on both ends are dots of colours that represent what time measure it is showing.

Green for hours and blue for minutes if I remember correctly.

I must have mistaken minutes with hours.

But what about the alarm clock? How did it go off at the wrong time…?

I knew it. That piece of junk is defected to the brim. I'm disposing of it when I return home after school.

So that must be why, but I shouldn't tell them if we have already drifted off of that topic, unless they decide to go back to it, which is unlikely.

"Well, we still have a lot of time on our hands before homeroom starts, so why don't we go have some tea in the dojo and talk in a better spot than here? It's rare we ever get a chance to talk like this."

"I'm up for that, since I don't have anything better to do then just wait another half an hour in my classroom, and it would be nice to catch up."

"Great, you down for it, Gorichi- chan?"

There is nothing more I like than tea, in drinks of course, or any consumable item in fact, but I actually have something important to do since I have free time on my hands.

"Thank you very much for the proposal, but I'm afraid I'll have to reject you for today, I'd love to join the both of you, but it's just that now through the results of coming earlier than expected, I have to do something a bit more important, so I apologise."

"What could be more important to you than tea? You've never dropped it."

"Rin, don't be like that to him. If he doesn't want to it's fine."

"I wasn't trying to make him join us, he's just acting a bit unusual today, and I don't know why."

"Him not wanting to have tea is unusual…?"

"No it's not just that, I don't want to go much into detail and talk about it while he's right here, I'm not that of a cruel person."

"Gorichi-chan, now that I've noticed, you look as if you have a fever. Is that why you don't want to come with us?"

This is partly why I want to get out of here, my head feels a bit hot. I look out of place.

"If you aren't feeling all right, you should go home and skip school for today, me or Rin will tell the teachers about you if you want."

"I'm perfectly healthy, it's just that the Sun is out and it's probably from the rays that I look a bit hot, I'm actually feeling chilly out here."

"Fine. If you want to leave the two of us alone you might as well go. You don't want to get a cold out here now do you?"

"If you don't mind me asking, what is it that you are going to be doing?"

"I had left a textbook in my shoebox that has some important notes in it, and I need to memorise them."

"Is it for the upcoming exams?"

"No, they're just personal notes that I have to memorise that aren't related to school.

If you don't mind, I'll be going now, thank you for the offer, it's a shame I can't join you, but I'll definitely take it up another time."

"If you change your mind, you know where to find us."

I'll definitely keep that in mind.

"I hope you enjoy your lunch Senpai."

"Rin has been telling me how good your cooking actually is, as if its master chef level."

"I don't want to brag, I've only started increasing my cooking skill last year, and through a lot of work and effort, it has increased dramatically."

"I would love to try it someday. See if what Rin says is actually true, but I don't doubt her nor you."

"I can give you my lunchbox if you want."

I don't mind it at all, and I would love to know what Mitsuzuri- senpai thinks of my homemade food, it's rare I ever get someone's opinion. So I take it out of my case and hand it to her.

"Oh I wasn't just asking you to give me yours. I just said if there was ever a chance to try some of it, I would appreciate it…!"

"But I can give you my portion, so please take mine."

"I can't just take your food, I have my own."

Even though I'm offering my lunchbox to her, Mitsuzuri- senpai keeps trying to push the box away from herself.

"Gorichi- chan, I'm not taking your lunch, keep it!"

"Please, Senpai."

I know how people act in these kind of situations, they start of by saying that they want some of it, and then imply on refusing, but truthfully they do want to have it.

"Mata-chan, you basically put way too much in my box every time."

"But you said that you don't eat in the mornings, so I take it upon myself to add more into your bento."

Tohsaka-senpai gets in between me and Mitsuzuri-senpai and pushes the box to me.

"I never manage to finish it anyway. I can just share half of it with Ayako, so stop forcing her to take your lunch and keep it."

"I… wasn't forcing her to take it, I just thought that Mitsuzuri-senpai wanted it."

"She said she wasn't taking it, so you should've stopped, but instead you ignored her and kept forcing her in taking it."

"Kya! I'm very sorry Mitsuzuri-senpai, please forgive my rudeness, I just wanted to have your opinion on my food."

"It's all right, if Rin's fine with sharing, then I'll just try it, so don't worry about it, we're all friends here."

"I'll prepare a lunchbox for you tomorrow, what kind of food do you like."

"You don't have to go through all that, I'm practically used to my own, and the cafeteria serves really good lunch sets too. I'll be happy with what Rin shares with me."

"I don't mind giving you half of it, he puts in way too much anyway."

"Then I'll put in less if you prefer it that way, I don't really like wasting leftovers, so I partly end up putting more, but I'll just have to get used to making it with less ingredients."

"I'll be seeing you later, Mitsuzuri-senpai. Good luck to the both of you."

I bow my head down to the both of them before leaving the entrance yard and march into the school building.

* * *

I was expecting this before I had came in.

The school is practically empty, there are no students or staff members that I am able to spot in the empty halls, or at least on this floor.

Most of the people that have already arrived are probably waiting in their classes, if there are any, some teachers have probably already come in to prepare before homeroom.

Though I do feel a bit odd, it's completely silent here, usually I come in when some of the students are coming in as well or just hanging around before the start of first period, but now it's completely different, the school feels dead.

But I know it's not completely empty besides me, I'm just appreciating to have this kind of chance to be in peace from others.

I wished that I could've actually join Tohsaka and Mitsuzuri-senpai for tea, but this was so abrupt and a bit unexpected that I don't have much of a choice. I am being given this good chance to prepare myself.

I can't quite remember as to why I had left it at school, I probably just mixed it in my notes on accident and had left it here for reasons that I don't know.

It was a bit risky leaving them here, even by some small chance that someone would be interested in looking into the contents of my shoe locker, it would be trouble.

I'll read a bit of the inscriptions and summoning details while there is no one around and take it home with me after school, I'll never make the same mistake of bringing it with me here ever again.

* * *

Seems that the second floor is also empty, the students to which those silhouettes had belonged have probably already gone into their classes, I hope they aren't my classmates.

This floor seems to be isolated as well, which is only better for me I guess.

I slide the door of my classroom to the side and by fortune I am met by no one, my class is still but arriving.

I should have about half of an hour before my classmates start coming in, plenty of time to learn the…

"Oh, good morning, Gorichi-kun."

A greeting. It isn't coming from the inside of my class, since I had said that it is empty. It's close, so it was delivered right from my side.

It sounds unfamiliar, yet somehow I know who it belongs to.

I turn ninety degrees to the side to face the source.

"Good morning to you as well, Emiya-senpai."

"You're here early."

"I'm not the only one who came in early today."

"… Oh, you're talking about me. I had to help the Student Council fix some items so I had came in earlier before classes so that I didn't have to do it during lunch, or after school."

"Did Ryuudou-senpai ask you, or did you decide it on your own?"

"I guess you could say both."

"So I was fixing one of the lights yesterday in your classroom, and I had accidentally forgotten my pliers after fixing them, and I came here to get them back."

"You shouldn't be so absent-minded and forget such things, I have some classmates that tend to steal lost items and take them for themselves."

"Great, Issei will be furious at me for making that mistake and not being able to fix the air conditioning."

"Don't worry, I had spotted them just before they would've became someone else's and had put them in the teachers drawer. No one dares to take anything from there."

"You're a saint. Thank you so much. I won't have to bother looking for them or deciding on buying a new pair."

Seems that it was the right decision to do that, as I even though about just leaving them there so that their owner would come back to retrieve them, but they would've probably gone missing.

I feel a bit blushed by an upper-classmen's gratitude, especially when it's Emiya-senpai.

* * *

"Thankfully the teacher didn't decide to take them to the Lost and Found, or take them for themselves."

"Is your teacher also a bit of a kleptomaniac?"

"Not that I know of, but I don't think so, they would probably get fired if they had done that though."

"Anyway, thanks, you've totally saved me…"

"It wasn't really anything, but you're welcome, Senpai."

"Does the heating in this classroom work?"

"The heating? It should be on throughout the whole school, so it should be working here too."

I quickly leave Emiya-senpai to check if the radiators below the windows are functioning. To my touch what I feel is only cold metal on my finger tips.

"Seems that it's not working. Oh well, I'll inform our teacher about this, they'll ask someone to fix it."

"I'm here, so why bother? I can fix it up right away."

"You don't have to do it…"

Without even letting me finish, Emiya-senpai passes me and crouches down near the radiators and examines them.

"I apologize, but why wait when I can fix it right now, I'm here already and I know what to do, besides, you helped me out so I'm returning the favour. You'll get cold sitting here in this frigid classroom."

I only wanted to hand Senpai his forgotten tool and have him be off on his way, I was glad to help him, and I don't need him to help me in return when I don't mind staying here. I don't even feel cold.

"I could just go wait in the halls. The heating works fine there, I don't mind waiting there until the teacher arrives."

"Then it wouldn't be as good as sitting at your desk and doing what you were planning on doing."

"What do you mean, Senpai?"

"It's more silent in here than in the halls, even if no one is yet starting to come in. Seeing that notebook I thought you were going to do something."

Oh no. I was so focused on giving Senpai the pliers back I forgot about it. It's still being held in my left hand.

"You shouldn't mind me. I'll just regulate the temperatures and be out of your hair."

"You're not minding me at all, I'm very grateful for your generosity."

"Does it contain your class notes or something? It has a very antique design to it."

"Something like that. It was a gift from a friend, I only keep very important information on a certain topic in it."

"Oh I understand now. Was it from Tohsaka?"

"…How did you know that?"

"It was just a guess. Oh, I'm sorry if I made you feel upset! I've only seen you being with her so I thought that she had gave it to you."

I haven't really been more sociable with anyone else besides Tohsaka-senpai, as we had only met through family business occasions, through them we got to know each other more, eventually spending more time together and it resulted to us becoming the best of friends. She was like an older sister to me, more after I was left by myself.

I haven't really found any reason to make any more friends in or outside of school. I act nice with everyone I meet and help with anything I am able to, not even becoming more sociable with anyone, and through the ones that had tried themselves, I ended up brushing them off.

I guess I'm just one of those people that doesn't have a nack for being more sociable with anyone besides with Tohsaka-senpai, though I do feel as if our bond is becoming more hollow, fearing that it might eventually evaporate.

I've cherished our bond as one of the most important things, I don't know what would happen if that suddenly broke.

 **Your own mind and soul will cease to function.**

"… I… can't really find a way to make any friends."

"I doubt that, you are the most popular junior in the whole school."

"It is because I spend most of my time with Tohsaka-senpai, and she is the school's ideal model student, my popularity depends on her. I don't mean to be popular here at all, I'm just a simple student."

"But has anyone ever talked with you, even if it was about Tohsaka?"

"Very little have, that's one of the main reasons I try to avoid others. I don't want to talk about Senpai with others behind her back."

"That's trustworthy of you, practically everyone talks about her behind her back, you're probably the only true friend she has here."

Emiya-senpai's smile makes me a bit blushed, or it may just be that he is finally finished with fixing the radiators, I hope that it's the latter.

"Thank you very much Senpai."

"It's easier to only have one friend anyway, right?"

"Yeah, I'm almost about finished just so you know, so I'll be out of your hair in just a second…"

"Senpai, please be careful…!"

I manage in time to warn Emiya-senpai to take a step back before he is splashed with the hot water from the pipes.

But he had to dodge it in less than a second or it would've landed on his trousers, so he didn't manage to get his bearings in time and slips back on the floor.

I quickly run over to him, almost slipping on the warm puddle in the process as I step onto it, wetting my slippers.

"Senpai, are you all right, are you hurt anywhere? Did you hit your head, let me help you up."

I put my right hand on his back and help him stand up, he is quite heavy. I hope he isn't hurt.

"I seem to be fine, thanks for helping me up, and also warning me."

"Are you really ok? Oh no, you burned your hand!"

Through a glimpse I am to spot a burn on Senpai's arm, some drops must have landed there as he was falling.

"It's just a slight first-degree burn, it's nothing compared to the injuries I get on a daily basis."

He laughs it off, though I still continue to worry.

"You should wash it of with cold water, maybe the nurse is in, I think we should…"

"Please, you don't have to worry about me, I said I am fine, I'm not going to die from a slight burn on the hand…"

Emiya-senpai's hand slightly pats on my head, not the burned on though, his other one. I am able to feel a bit of a mix of calmness and anxiety from his gentle pats.

"You worry about me too much. Are you the same to Tohsaka? She's really is fortunate to have a caring guy like you as a friend…"

His hand though, suddenly stops at a halt.

"Sorry about that, looks that even after all this time, I'm still used to doing that to you, you probably feel really embarrassed now?"

"Not… at all, Senpai. I haven't been treated like that since when…"

"Gorichi-kun, uhhh the water's still coming out of the pipe…"

Instead of looking at my back to check on the pipes, I automatically look at my feet, the puddle which had formed a bit ago has increased in area, and is continuing on becoming bigger.

"I'll cover the pipe!"

"I'll get the paper towels from the cupboard!"

* * *

"Senpai, you've already done too much, you don't have to help me clean this up."

"I'm the one who made it, so I should be cleaning it up instead."

After screwing back the valve onto the pipe, the only thing that was left to do was to clean up the now huge warm puddle of water from the floor.

It's difficult trying to clean it up without getting ourselves covered in radiator water, but through carefulness we've been lucky to avoid that, or at least me.

I wanted to clean it up myself, but Senpai had insisted that he should be the one to clean it all up, so instead we decided on cleaning it both up. A whole paper towel roll has already been used and we are on half of the second one, the rubbish bin seems to be also piling up.

Though I am a bit more focused on getting this cleared of water before anyone comes in and sees this quite unique spectacle.

"It' done. It'll dry in a couple of minutes anyway, I don't really want to waste any more paper towels."

"Sorry this had to happen."

"It's all right Senpai, you hadn't known this would happen, and you did end up heating the classroom."

I feel a bit overwhelmed by the heat now, from all this working and the current of warmness that is being emitted from the radiator next to us.

"Thank you very much Senpai, you're always true to your word, and I am very grateful for the time you had put into me."

"I don't mind it at all, and you're welcome. If you need anything else, just let me now.

Do you need any help with putting anything back?"

"Thank you, but I can take everything from here, you should get back to Ryuudou-senpai before he starts wondering where you went off to."

"Crap! I totally forgot about Issei, man he's going to be pissed on where I was.

Sorry Matasa, I'll see you later, good luck with classes!"

And he runs of, leaving me finally at peace in the room, hopefully he didn't forget what he came here for.

But Emiya-senpai, he called me by… my given name.

He kept calling me by my last name every time, so why had he suddenly decided on parting with my first name?

I was addressed by my first name by him before, but soon he had changed to calling me by my family name, and this one time, from one of his words that wouldn't seem to be that of importance, I feel contented.

I wouldn't mind being addressed like that again by him, I would actually be happy with it, I'd feel more close with Emiya-senpai.

I stand there, thinking about the words Emiya-senpai had said before taking his leave, hearing such a friendly title, I haven't been called like that by him for such a long time.

If I had taken his lost tool to the teacher, this moment would have probably never had happened. I feel as if I am making a friend of him.

At any case, I'll still be seeing more of him in school, but I won't want to annoy him too much.

It was just that his generosity made him want to assist me, which led to our moment together here.

Maybe it would be nice to… at the least once, walk with him after classes.

Today Tohsaka-senpai has more classes, and she told me to not bother waiting for her for her lectures to finish and for me to go on home, but Emiya-senpai is in a different class, so maybe he has the same amount as me.

Just once… I would like to talk to him, to get to know how he has been doing, and maybe becoming… friends.

But I guess it's useless to just stand around here thinking deeply of this. I had refused Tohsaka-senpai's and Mitsuzuri-senpai's offer to have tea with them, and I've spent more time than expected with Emiya-senpai, which was at all not in wane, I wonder if they're still at the dojo, the other club members must already be coming in, so Tohsaka-senpai is probably minding her own business.

And I should go study a bit before anyone else starts coming in here or it'll be too tensed to read anything. I should use this opportunity while I still have it to my advantage before that happens.

I'll have to prepare myself for the coming of this night.

* * *

 _Gorichi Residence_ _._ _Past_ _midnight._

* * *

I was way to demanding today.

Classes had gone past quick as usual. I Had enjoyed them, I learn something new and interesting everyday, and my curiosity has made me for the better.

Of course with interest comes boredom, like everyone else, I have some subjects that I like, and some others I dislike, but cope with them anyway, as they are beneficial to my education.

And as I had said, all classes were over before I knew it, and the only thing I was thinking was being able to go home, with someone else besides Tohsaka-senpai.

It's not that I dislike going with her, I have great times discussing on how are days were, on how we had to survive through the torturing hours, but on these days our lessons ended at different times, so we would just leave the school once our day ended and left the other one for their day to be finished.

But only this once, I would've preferred to walk with someone with whom I rarely to never get to speak to, and through certain circumstances we were finally able to talk to each other.

After my last lesson had ended, I quickly put all my books into my schoolbook case and with haste ran through the halls, changed into my outdoor shoes and ran onto the entrance field, in which I had made in less than a minute.

I waited near the gates of the school, waiting for a certain someone with whom I could've had the chance to know how their life was actually going while walking on the sidewalks to our destinations, to once again experience such liveliness that I had lost long ago.

I waited and waited until there were no more students exiting the school at the time, even after that, I waited ten minutes for even a slight chance of them exiting the front entrance, but the only thing that was there was nothing.

It had turned disappointing, and I had become a bit depressed, my little hopes that I had were shattered, but it was only that I had asked for too much.

Even if we had met near the gates, who would've proved that they would actually bother on going with me, it was just that they wanted to be nice to me when we had met again.

My thoughts had even came up with an idea to wait for Tohsaka-senpai's classes to end, but she would only scold me for waiting such a long time just for her, so I just left alone, as always.

I had high hopes throughout the day, but they were in nigh, just my selfish wishes.

I had various thoughts going all through my head, whether if I was just too late, I had to be much faster and Emiya-senpai just escaped under my nose, or if I had just waited a bit longer, his figure would've left the school building, and I would've met him near the school gates with a greeting as "So we meet again", and laugh mischievously.

To try and be as friendly as possible, to accustom with the social skills that I have, like a normal friend, to make a friend, of Emiya-senpai.

Though I could always try another day, maybe even not putting the "surprising Emiya-senpai" act in consideration, and just ask him if he would like to walk home together after school once.

Another option was to find out his timetable and memorize his schedule, but that would make me a bit of a stalker per se.

I hope I won't annoy Senpai to much by being such an insisting person, I wouldn't mind if he ended up turning me down if it was what he wanted, I was being a nuisance and stepping over my boundaries.

Who am I to say that I should be the one to experience everything good in life? I don't have that luxury, as I am just a simple irrelevant person that you may see everyday.

But during the time when I had went home today, alone, it felt different than usual. I am used to going alone after school on days like these, but today I did feel rather… dismal.

I had felt like that most of my way. My mood was mixed with my thoughts and plans that were in my head.

It was an expected change of mood, just during a time in which I had never had it happen. An unpleasant end to the day it turned out to be.

Though to be honest, I felt rather nervous when Emiya-senpai came near my classroom this morning. I tried to keep as relaxed near him as possible, but it came so sudden, and we hadn't conversed in such a long time, I was met with surprise, but had enjoyed that time with him.

In the end, it looks that either I will have to give up on my selfish thoughts, or engage on trying again, even considering on asking Senpai.

Actually, before he had ran off out of the classroom, I wanted to ask him that. I had built up courage while being with him. Even though still on a certain level of anxiety, I was ready to ask if I could accompany him home and get to know how he is.

The only options seem to be…

 **Give up.**

 **It doesn't even matter anymore, he doesn't care even a little about you, it's been proven by what he had done with you. It's utterly useless to even bother thinking about it. The reason for why he was so nice to you this morning is that it was his obligation as an upper-classmen, though behind school grounds, you are nothing but a mistake to him. And besides…**

 **Your future has already been decided.**

…

It is only a waste. Senpai had proved that long ago anyway. But I still respect him, and care for him, looking past his actions.

If only things could've turned out differently for me, guess I don't deserve to be feeling happy, it's all been bad and hurtful, it's a wreck that should be cleaned up of all useless remains.

I get Emiya-senpai's generosity at school, but I don't even deserve to have that, even if it does seem fake. It felt nice, and I did feel slightly happy, even if it was an act, even if it was produced, made into his duty as an upper-classmen, to have respect on school grounds, being known as the most generous person.

The reason why I didn't even get to meet him near the gates was either because he had left beforehand, because he had read through me and wanted to avoid meeting me after school, or was waiting inside the building for me to leave, and I had made him wait.

I'm a real burden to others. I make false accusations that negatively affect others, obscured by my selfish greediness, I hate it so much.

Hate is such a powerful word, but it's the only way I can describe my foolish actions, if I could find a word more hateful than hate, I would use it in an instant.

Hated by all of humanity, even the nicest person out there would instantly find a reason to hate it, to see it as an annoying thing, even urging them to want to get rid of it instantly because it's so annoying.

I don't want my actions to negatively affect anyone, I want to be nice to everyone and make friends with them.

 **It's useless.**

It's unnecessary, worthless, meaningless, yes.

But even if my future has been decided, I want to be the best that I could make of myself, even though I think that some hate me, I want better, I want to be helpful, at least this once, to find a light in myself.

I don't imagine Senpai as the meanest person while out of school grounds, and I could never talk bad of him, even if he had done something bad, as that is exactly how much I respect him as an upper-classmen.

And even though if it doesn't seem like it, I still consider him as… a friend, even if it doesn't seem like it.

I hope he got home safe, that wanted killer had been worrying me. Though Senpai is smart and strong, I can't think of anything or anyone that may take him out.

Even if that whole household had been murdered, such a horrible thing to happen here, these kind of occurrences have a little to no chance of happening.

Something more serious may be going on, since that family, from what I know, have no relations or past history that could result to their horrible deaths, they were the nicest of people, like everyone around here. Could a random killing have happened?

Anything could be happening with them out and about. Their way may even lead to anyone I care about.

The only thing I can hope for is them to be caught and apprehended before anything bad happens again, if it is something that the police department can find out.

I'll feel more relaxed once that is over. I'll won't have to worry that much about everyone's safety, no one must die like that, the family didn't even deserve such a brutal execution, it was a massacre.

When I was walking back, I hadn't noticed it this morning. The streets were pretty empty with people here and there, but there was so much blood on the windows. The whole stone path was covered in dry blood, it had seeped through the body bags and dripped on the stones, painting them a slight reddish colour, the inside is probably much worse than that.

I wish for everyone's safety in Fuyuki.

Dark nights are falling onto the small sea side town, something obscure may be awaiting, for everyone.

I've been waiting until night has fallen, while everyone has went to sleep, so that I have no casualties during the act. I must keep any casualties at a minimum.

And I know for sure that it is time, since my head has stopped burning. It has come to this.

There was nothing else that I had to do, so I've been sitting here for the past three hours with a cup, which is now unfortunately empty.

After making the preparations, there was still a bit of time before I had needed to commence my task, so I decided to think about my future plans while having a nice cup of a warm beverage.

First I started of with a brew of rosehip tea, which I had finished the whole teapot in an hour, which made up eight cups. Then I cleaned the wares and mixed some green tea made with kabusecha leaves.

I would've made a normal brew of dried fruit tea, but I knew that what I was going to be doing would be during midnight, I wanted to feel a bit buzzed and not fatigued before the so called "act".

My tongue feels a bit bitter at the moment to the amount of tea that I had drank through these past three hours, but I wouldn't mind to have another cup or two, maybe I should wait another half of an hour and go make a batch of green tea with some ceylon leaves that were shipped in. Oh how I love that tea as well, the aroma it emits is just splendid, and the bitterness is not too strong to the tongue!

But no, I shouldn't be distracted by the fine leaves that I have stored in my pantry, I have a much more important matter to attend to that only I must do, I can have another cup in the coming hours, after I have summoned the Heroic Spirit.

* * *

I had hoped that my choosing would happen, but didn't much expect that it would actually had happened, even if it did occur in such an unusual and indifferent way than it has too, but it did. I don't know what was seen in me, since I am but as an empty shell of a soul inside, I was found worthy to possess the set of Command Spells.

Though they were placed in a rather strange location, I had though that I was chosen falsely and these were chosen to be incrested onto a different individual, but it may only be mere defect caused by a bad culling, and I was chosen as a participant.

It will only take a matter of minutes for my participation in the Holy Grail War to finally commence. I already have the Command Spells, and all I need now is to summon the Heroic Spirit.

The summoning will take place where nothing from the outside will be seen, if any casualty happens, it will only be heard and witnessed inside the house, which's only inhabitant at the moment is me. Behind this door, is a staircase leading to the lower grounds of the estate.

I step through.

* * *

This is the perfect place to hold the summoning of the Heroic Spirit. There are windows that give out a bit of light from the outside. During a sunny day they may light up the whole floor enough to be visible in normal vision. Though the glasses are tainted on the outside layer so that no one may peek at what may be happening here.

It is currently nigh time, with only the moon slightly illuminating through the tainted windows, I can barely see my surroundings, but this will be enough.

I had been done with the preparations beforehand as to not waste any time.

I took many precautions to this one. By holding the summoning in the area that is in most seclusion and during night while everyone is already in their homes, I took casualties to a minimum.

To be fair, I am rather nervous. This will be the first time I have ever done such a complex magical act - the summoning of a Heroic Spirit.

A Heroic Spirit. A reknown character from folklore or history that had done many great deeds during their life, being taken in by the Throne of Heroes after their death, and I will need to summon one.

It's such a high level of conjuring that I have some doubts that it may even be possible- summoning a dead individual into the present world, it seems ludicrous, but it has been done before, so it is true.

Since I have been chosen to participate in the Holy Grail War, having the Command Seals prove it, I must first summon the so called Heroic Spirit.

My worthiness is little of this, but I have already been picked, and will not throw away this opportunity so soon.

I guess my choosing will only be proven if the summoned Heroic Spirit, if I do actually be able to summon it, decides to make a contract with me, I may end up looking weak against them and they decide on killing me. I've heard of results like that actually happening.

I'll put my luck up to the test then, worst case scenario I end up dead in this here basement by the spirit before the war even starts.

The item I will be using for the summoning, I hadn't actually have one prepared specifically for this as that I had no certainty that I would be participating.

Only a dagger with a rather flamboyant religious look that I had found in the knife storage in this basement. It had the largest amount of magical energy out of all of the others, and I had not come up with anything that has such a large amount of mana as it possessed anywhere inside the house that could possibly summon a Heroic Spirit. Even with a slight amount of it happening , I had decided it was sufficient.

I don't quite remember how a weapon with such a peculiar design happened to be here, though it was in the knife storage in which my father used to keep some ancient blades, but I wouldn't think that he would keep this, it seems so uncomfortable to hold…

Oh, you have to hold it in reverse with the blade going down. I had held it with the blade going up, now it feels much more comfortable in my hand.

So this dagger was primarily designed for stabbing, and the blade itself seems to be sharp like a razor, specially made for cutting through thick flesh. It could maybe even cut through bone.

The dagger might limit some of the classes the Heroic Spirit might be summoned in. I can't think of a Saber using a knife, or an Archer, or a Lancer, so all of the Knight classes seem to be out of it. Though no, they may be one of those, it would just mean that this here dagger wouldn't be their primary weapon that they would be using, but the chance of that happening is slim.

I actually had hoped to summon an Archer class Servant, but this here dagger is giving me some doubts of that happening at this point…

Well, I guess I'll just have to deal with whatever class the Heroic Spirit is summoned in, I could practically do with any, it was just that I would've had an advantage with an Archer, but I'll take whatever I get, IF I manage to summon one that is.

With an Archer class Servant I could've…

( **Thunk!** )

Not again. Why am so clumsy today, I almost cut my right forearm while falling. Well, at the least I didn't hit my head again, I would've broken my nose if it had hit the stone floor below me.

Seems that I had not noticed the books that had fallen from a nearby stool that I had left them on when making space for the Summoning Circle, and had tripped over the top one, falling on my right shoulder.

Instead of putting the books back onto the unbalanced stool, I put them on the counter where I had put the dagger that I am now holding. Now they should not be able to just slide on the surface and fall onto the ground again.

I'll put them back in the bookcase where all the other tomes are stored after the ritual. I had read through them not to long ago and had left them unattended for some days, while instead I should've just put them back in the bookcase with all the other magical tomes.

Though I hope that I didn't damage the dagger while falling, even through all this time, it is in pristine condition, and I wouldn't want the quality of the item being bad to interfere in the summoning. I take a thorough look at the handle, the hand-guard, and the blade, and it doesn't seem to have sustained any type of damage. It seems to be made from quite durable material as well, so that you would need special equipment to even bend it five degrees. The blade seems to be so reflective, in total perfection through all these…

I am able to spot my widened image in the blade, and the fact that a certain item is not being seen or reflected makes me check my collar.

Oh no, it dropped again!

The brooch dropped out of the collar again. It could've dropped and landed anywhere, I need it!

In disarray, I fall to my knees and begin searching for the important item that I had lost, crawling and dirtying my knees as I drag them on the stone floor.

It shouldn't have fallen too far from here, it should be somewhere on the cleared part of the floor. And I was right, it had dropped not to far from the stool on which those nasty books were sitting on.

I can't afford to lose this, and since this is such a crowded basement it would've taken me quite a bit of time to look through all of the furniture and other items, luckily my short search only took about a minute.

Hmm, now as I am holding this small clear jewel, I notice that it contains some amount of magical energy as well, maybe a bit more than the dagger. Actually, much more than the dagger.

I must've not noticed it since I had been wearing it on myself through this whole time when looking for a sufficient catalyst, the mana had mixed with the one in my own body and I was not able to sense it. I had known that it contained magical energy since it was an ancient magical treasure of my family, but just had forgotten about it.

It may be a long-shot, but this jewel may be a sufficient catalyst used in the summoning. I would have a higher chance of summoning a class that I have been wanting to, and the Heroic Spirit themselves may be my ancestor or someone related to the Gorichi family.

But if I use this as a catalyst, they would perhaps want me to give this item to them, since it had belonged to them originally. I wonder if the Servant knows what was used as their summoning catalyst. I may be able to hide it before they notice it in my hands. If that doesn't work, I'll just explain to them that this item now belongs to me, and as my Servant they will have to obey my wishes.

I apologize, wielder of this rather stunning knife, but I'll be using this since it gives me a higher chance of summoning who I want.

To not waste time, I quickly decide to get the summoning over with, by just affixing the dagger to my pants and putting it back later once I am done with the summoning. Straight of to the task then.

Stepping into the middle of the circle drawn on the stone floor, I take a couple of breaths before beginning the procedure. I've never tried any type of familiar summoning, and this is the summoning of a Heroic Spirit. I'm having slight thoughts that I may even be absorbed of magical energy and die right in the middle of this…

… I feel nervous from whatever may end up happening, anything could go wrong if I make a mistake. Even if you know how to do something by mind, anything could happen.

 **You can't…**

Whatever. Let's begin.

Magical energy capacity at maximum. Casualty rate seems at zero.

Concentration ratio at near maximum. Casualty rates have been slightly increased.

Catalyst at hand. Catalyst's magical energy capacity at… half… no… more than maximum…? Casualty rate is back at zero.

So this jewel is more powerful than you would expect it to be, huh. I'm a bit afraid of the power that I may end up using to the summoning. I may end up drawing a card much powerful than I could control.

My mana capacity is full, since I hadn't been using any magecraft for days, it has refilled itself. If nothing goes wrong, I'll be able to summon the Servant at the end, no matter how strong they may be. My fate will only be decided from if they see me worthy of being their Master.

Please, spirit. Find something of worth in me…

I stretch out my right arm with the jewel in hand. Concentration on the catalyst is on point. It will only start when I start transferring magical energy into the jewel.

That is what's so amazing about this here gemstone. It's able to hold magical energy over its magical capacity, as if it would be an endless box that may store anything of any quantity.

The whole basement seems to be filled with my exceeded magical energy, and my concentration on the item is at its peak, no one will disturb me, I am alone, with this Servant soon to be summoned. The ritual… may begin.

Magical energy from the core of my body starts to seep through the arm and air around into the crystal, physical energy.

The air around me is becoming thicker from the dense energy around me, it's working, but… it's not finishing up. Is my magical energy not enough? No, it is more than enough, if only slightly, everything should be fine.

Do I need to push more into the jewel, is this slow ratio not performing anything? I'm putting it into the jewel, so it should be working. Fine then, more.

Still not working. How is this not enough? More, faster. It has to do more than this.

I'm feeling lightheaded, I'm doing it way too quick. I have a lot of magical energy, a mage with less than me would already be passed out by now, but I still stand, with only a bit weighty.

"Spirit, I have chosen you to be my possible ally in this war."

If just the rules of how the summoning is supposed to go is not enough, I'll have to call them out.

"I, the mage, am asking you, to form a pact with me and fight by my side."

"My life has been chosen for this, fate has decided to bestow me the righteous title and obligation of your summon."

"Fate has led me to yours, to have the both of us fight alongside in battle and achieve our one goal."

With each word it's becoming more and more dense here, I'm being pushed a bit to the ground by the overwhelming energy. It's changed from before.

The spirit has heard my calling. I need to continue.

"Lend me your sword to strike down our enemies in battle. Lend me your shield to protect against any attacks. Lend me your weapon to help us come forth in this war of ours."

"May we bond a friendship of Master and Servant. May our bond lead us to victory, and may it be worth all in the end."

"You will only listen to my rightful requests and your own intuition by my allowance, you will only listen to what may lead you to your goal."

"So come, and fight in my stead."

I'm almost at my end. This has been taking a while, I've been putting the mana transferring ratio at my maximum and am almost empty of it. I will… lose my … consciousness, if they…

"Come forth, o Guardian of Scales!"

It comes to my last bits of mana, and I crumble to the ground. This summoning was rather difficult, I had thought that I would still be able to stand and would have only ended up using half of my magical energy reserve, but I am left almost empty.

I had to leave the list bit, or I would've ended up loosing my consciousness, or better yet end up dead. Even if I did end up passing out I would not be able to wake up for days, and I would eventually had died either way.

My head hurts, I think I'm bleeding again. I put my fingers to my nose to check if I am correct.

Yup, fresh blood coming out of my nasal holes, I wouldn't be surprised if my brain got fried during the ritual. I had used up so much of my magical energy.

If I had used this much, then I should've been able to draw the most powerful Servant, if it had required such a huge amount of magical energy to be able to manifest themselves into this world.

God. My head is hurting so much, and seems that not only my nose is bleeding but also my eyes, I can see a bit of red.

I am unable to get up. The pain is forbidding me from standing up, my knees are locked onto the cobble floor and are unable to rise up. I am an easy prey now, I wouldn't be able to protect myself if I had wanted to.

If I had summoned the Heroic Spirit, they would be able to dispose if me any moment if they aren't able to spot their requirements in me. I probably would seem pathetic to them, a weak Master has summoned them and had used up most of their magical energy, and now ended up bleeding from every possible hole on the floor and trying to hold themselves together.

The dreadful pain is beginning to go away, but the bleeding is still continuing, even though I can feel that some of my nose holes are clogged up already. I think I can stand.

I try to bring myself up and almost topple, but am able to keep my posture and balance. My vision is also a bit clogged, it's dark. The headache made me bit nauseous. I need to recover.

My whole face feels dry from the blood, I would probably be horrified if I looked at the mirror. There isn't any water that I could use to wash this off here, just liquids and potions that I would rather not put on my bare face.

I use a tissue paper from a packet that I had in my pocket to brush of the dried blood off my face, but the results seem pretty much the same. I've brushed it off pretty good, but my field of vision is still a bit shady. It's become darker then before, I am barely able to see anything.

This feels a bit as if I'm in a horror movie: in a dark basement, with the chance of somebody else being here with me, that may end up leaving me dead in this dark place. But…

Shouldn't have the Spirit said something by now, like asking me something like "Are you my Master?" , or anything at all?

Even if I hadn't seem as their ideal Master, I should already be dead. Or they wanted for my last moment at least being able to see the one who takes my life.

It is dark, but I can still see a bit into the darkness. The illuminating light from the moon outside has lessened, and is covering less of the basement than before.

There is a candle on the wall that when it is lit up, all the other ones in the room light up with it and vice versa. If I can get to it I'll be able to see more clearly.

But if I walk, I may end up tripping on something, since I do tend to be a clutz and trip on everything in here.

Now I'm just standing in the middle of this room, and I don't even know if I'm alone or what. I can't hear anything here either. It feels isolated and desolate.

I still seem to have the jewel in my hand, the one that had taken such a large amount of my mana. Though I feel as if it has much more magical energy than it had before the ritual.

Huh, it's glowing. The magical energy that is stored into it is emitting light from inside the crystal. I hadn't noticed it because I had clutched my hand and didn't let the light to leave.

If only little, I can still make out what's underneath me by holding the jewel in front of me. With this I can make my way to the wall with the candle.

With tiny steps, I make my way from my side from the summoning circle, passing the antique items that have been on the floor. The jewel doesn't seem to be running out of any light.

This chair. I'm right near the wall, even though I can see it. I hadn't moved this chair when I was tidying up, and I remember that there is no candle holder near it, though there is one if I take a right.

There. Now I only need to swipe the wick and it should light up automatically across the whole basement. And that is what I do.

The whole basement is lit up, though only partly, since these candles themselves are made with magical energy, and the created flame is blue. The crystal continues to shine in my hand. It's full of magical energy that is emitting it, but its function to concentrate magical energy should kick up and it should go out in a bit.

But now that I am able to see my surroundings, I am left quite disappointed and puzzled. I am, in fact, the only one individual in this here basement.

Was the summoning not a success? How is that possible? I used up so much of my magical energy and for what? No, it should have worked, I don't know, but maybe they're hiding somewhere.

I survey every corner and gap in the basement, but am left with nothing, there is no one here but me.

All this effort… for nothing… and I had thought that I had summoned a powerful Heroic Spirit, but it was only a mere false assumption.

I must've just transferred my magical energy into the jewel during the ritual, instead of letting the Servant form a presence, I failed…

And I won't be able to redo it, because I'm almost dry of magical energy. It has most been stored into the jewel, and I could transfer it back into me, but not all of it. Once magical energy has set into the gem, it is compressed to fit its size, and it would only manage to establish a regular flow that can't be rushed. Transferring all of it back into me would take at least twenty four hours, presumably more, and I will already have run out of time by then.

… I knew that I would end up failing, it was just a mistake. I wasn't supposed to be part of this, I should have known from the moment I found out, that… it would only come to this.

The only thing that I feel now is… disappointment in myself, I… thought too much of myself, only the result becoming this.

If I had only used another catalyst, then maybe I would've just done it correctly.

I didn't even think this much through, as my status as a magus. Would I be worthy to be a participant in the Holy Grail War? Would I be able to summon a Servant? Would I be an acceptable Master to them?

But now I've lost my chance. I'll have to wait here, to be eliminated.

I wouldn't be able to fend myself against other Servants by myself, that's why I needed to summon one, so that they could fight for me, to protect me!

Now, all I can do is wait to be eliminated… I'll be dead in only a short while, might take a couple of days, but I will only end up dead before this ends.

Even if I would've transferred the magical energy from the jewel back to me, it wouldn't matter. I had to summon the Servant now, doing it later is not an option…

I guess I'll… just live out as I usual have been, I'll go to school, clean the house… until I am finally at the end of a Servant's weapon.

My end is near. The only thing I am able to do is live out the last bit of a normal lifestyle that I may have.

…The jewel is still glowing, but it's almost done, the light is becoming slightly dim, it's compressing the magical energy…

I squeeze the small stone in my hand. It's hard as a diamond. Once I die, I have no idea what will be done with this family heirloom. It may as well just end up like me, to just, disappear.

But I'll keep it on myself as always. I've been wearing it ever since I could remember, so I should die with it on me. I've promised to have it, haven't I?

I had high hopes for this, to be able to summon someone associated with this jewel, but instead it turned out to be my misconception and turned into my own failure. I… don't know if I actually deserve to wear it.

I am supposed to wear it, but I feel as if my status doesn't confirm that I have to wear it, maybe it was that. I wasn't supposed to use it, because I wasn't worth to have it.

And, I am only doing this because it was left to me, so that I may cherish it and keep it safe, it's an important family item, so it's my obligation to not have it for myself, but to protect it.

I'll keep it safe with me, until my end comes, that's the least that I am able to do.

There's no point in just standing here anymore, I'm not in the mood to clean everything up. This can wait until tomorrow, or actually, why even bother? I'm not going to be using it anymore anyway.

* * *

I'm supposed to wake up in only a few hours, to start getting ready to go to Senpai's house and to school, like any other day.

I… wasn't cut out to be a Master. Me being chosen was a mistake. The Command Seal was probably supposed to belong to another Magi, but there was a problem and ended up becoming incrested into an unusual location.

Normally one would have a Command Seal somewhere on the surface of their body, with it usually being on the back of their hand.

If they would've failed to summon a Servant like myself, they would be in the same situation as me right now, but to expel themselves from the Grail War, they could just dispose of their Command Seals.

Though for me, I would die instantly, since it is on such an important part of the body.

Nothing works for me anymore, it has just been one tragic…

Seems that I didn't notice that I still had the interesting looking dagger that I thought about using as a possible catalyst. It was attached to the loop of my pants through the whole ritual.

I would've probably had better luck if I had used this instead. It's not any kind of special magical item, just a simple dagger containing magical energy.

This dagger must've been specifically made with a request, judging from its intriguing design. And the cross shaped handle may tell that the person it belonged to was very religious, or preferred their weapons in an unusual design.

No, clearly from the shape, it was meant to be made resembling a religious cross, a bit gothic if you ask me.

So it's a one of a kind item.

I can't find any use for it anymore. I don't like the way it feels in my hands as I am holding it. It is a good weapon- it's sharp, the perfect weight, easy to hold, but it's not for me to handle. It wouldn't protect me against a Servant while in my hands anyway.

I should put it back before I go to bed. It belongs in the basement with the other knifes and daggers. I don't even think I had the right to take it in the first place.

Besides, I left the candles on in the basement, and I have to exstinguish the candles, it'll save me the mana stored in them and not having to refill them again. Also it's a possible fire hazard.

* * *

Back in the basement, where what I had expected to summon a quite powerful Servant had failed, resulting in the failure of the whole summoning process of any Servant at all.

The candles are almost out of their indigo light, only leaving out a bit of luminosity along the walls.

I put back the dagger in its rightful place as it should be, also quickly polished it with a rag before putting it back along with the lesser, more typical knifes and dirks.

Honestly, there are so many magical artefacts in this here basement that have been collected over the decades by my various ancestors, I don't know what to do with them. I mean, once I have been, so to say, eliminated.

I could try at writing a will for another mage family. They would get ownership of all these items after my departure, and these wouldn't be exposed to the normal population of people that aren't mages.

There is also an option to dispose of them entirely. I could burn them somewhere and leave no trace of them, but I would feel regretful after that.

Everything here, belongs to the Gorichi family. Just giving it away to another Magi family, it would mean leaving it to our past adversaries, and they would continue our works in their own names.

My father, my grandmother and my ancestors before that- all of them had been researching deep into the world of magic, never being able to finish some of their long-time research, and I would just have to give it away, so that it wouldn't go to waste?

Even some of their already finished work may be taken after their deaths, away from them, confiscating of their hard work, it would label us as nothing.

But burning all of it would probably lead to the same, maybe even worse, but it is how they would've wanted.

For me, I just don't even know on what to decide. It's a huge decision for me, that means my family's reputation, and I only want to help. And I have to do it as soon as possible as well.

The lights are almost out. They will slowly regenerate the lost magical energy from the environment, if not, then I will have to refill them manually with my own magical energy.

The one behind me has seem to have completely gone out, so it's only a matter of time before all the other once go out as well…

…Even though, all of them work simultaneously with each other…

No, it didn't go out.

The light that deemed onto the floor and wall in front of me, even if it was little, has just disappeared completely, leaving it only dark, with only the other candles lighting the corners.

If the reserved magical energy in them had went out, all of them would go out at the same time, but it was only that one behind me.

The edges are being lit up as usual. It isn't coming from the other candles, but from that one. A shadow is in front of me, something is blocking the light coming from the candle.

I freeze in fear. It can't just be furniture that moved somehow, because there is nothing but a space there, and the shadow is more like a figurine.

There is someone standing behind me, covering the light from the candle. All the doors in the house are locked, so it can't be some kind of burglar or intruder. If that was the case, I wouldn't even be feeling the bit of fear right now.

And know that I have actually noticed the presence, I can sense it- the high source of magical energy, too high for a person to have. They are not human.

A Servant.

Another Master has finally found out my location and has come to take care of their opponent as soon as possible, leaving their Servant to do the deed.

They already know that I have found out about them. I've stopped moving and my breathing has become compressed. They can probably hear my heartbeat a bit faster as well.

They're waiting for me to turn around, so that I can face them as they take my life right before my maker.

So soon. I wasn't even able to write the will I had to. Maybe the Master of the Servant will take it for themselves. It would be logical than to just leave these quite useful items that are free for the grabbing.

Once I turn around, I will face death. It has only been decided. I guess that it was only decided to be sooner than later. At least I won't have to worry about the paperwork.

I close my eyes in preparation for my offing. May it be quick or slow, I don't want to witness it, may it be unknown for me. My death will only be but a regular occurrence in this world. I will only become a victim, dying by a ruthless killer's hands.

I'm sorry, Emiya-senpai…

…I wished, I could've…

"So, you have finally noticed my presence, well, you have quite some detection skills for a young magus. But let me ask, are you my Master?"

I turn around. I for sure had thought that I would be a goner, but after turning one hundred and eighty degrees, nothing had happened, nothing at all, just those four surprising words.

Honestly, I had expected to instantly be killed righty there, but I was still alive and breathing, yet slowly. I was surprised to see the unusual entity before me.

It was a black figure, shrouded in the darkness, with only the light of the dim candle outlining its posture. It was leaning on the wail, as if it were waiting for something.

"I didn't expect you to be this startled, but tell me, are you the mage that summoned me into this war?"

The black figure was tall, and I could see an outline of dark black clothes that it was wearing. There was also a weird object on their head that seemed to resemble some kind of top hat I think. Hearing their voice, you can also pretty much determine that they are in fact female.

Seems that they are just as confused as me, but just slightly less. They are asking me whether I am their Master, which I have no idea of, since I had thought that the summoning I had did fail, but here they are.

"Hehe, sorry, but you probably can't see me in this darkness, can't you. Let me fix it."

The dark figure comes standing off of the wall, and flings their black cape right in front of me. My instincts tell me to jump a bit back, even though it seemed as if it wouldn't do any harm to me.

Doing that, it resulted in… nothing. Nothing happened after that.

Only the candles become more brighter, and change their colour to of a regular candle. The room seems brighter than ever now, and I am able to see the figure in front of me.

"I apologize for the dramatic entry, but it was way to dark in here to see anything with these blue flames, so I changed the lighting if you don't mind. Oh, how rude of me, I should at the least greet you properly."

And as I had guessed, I was correct.

The individual standing before me, judging from their clothing, they can't be non other than a Servant.

She bows down with elegance, taking her skirt and bending her legs down.

She is dressed like a nineteen century noble man would wear, just with a skirt. She has the, well, smaller version of a top hat, and everything.

"Well, since you are the first person I have met here, I presume you are indeed my summoner. Very pleased to meet you."

I'm still at a bit of a confusion with this woman. Was it just mistake, and I had actually succeeded in summoning a Servant, and that it only took longer for her to materialise into this world?

"Oi, don't tell me that the magus who had summoned me is mute, because I unfortunately don't know sign language."

"Are you, the one that I summoned?"

"There you go. I was summoned in this here room, so the answer to your question is yes, though there had seemed to be a bit of a delay."

She seems friendly, though she has a bit of a sarcastic undertone. I shouldn't annoy her too much.

"I'm sorry to ask you, but when exactly were you summoned, and I mean the exact time. How long have you been here for?"

"I can't tell you the exact time, since unfortunately I don't have some kind of clock on me, but I could say… about ten minutes ago, in the circle for which you had used to summon me."

That was a bit after I had left. She's been waiting here all this time?

"Took you long enough to come back here, Master. I thought you would keep me locked up here until morning, or…forever."

"The door was unlocked. And can't your body shift into a non-physical form that may let you pass through solid surfaces?"

"I… thought that I was supposed to stay here until you had returned. I only thought that was what you had wanted, but instead, you had just decided to leave me in the dark."

"Oh, I'm truthfully sorry! I had not intended to leave you in here! I just thought that I had failed in summoning a Servant, so I left. Please, accept my apology."

I feel ashamed. Summoning a Servant and then just leaving them in the dark. Even though it was on a false assumption.

"Hey, don't get anxious about it! It's partly my fault for coming in a delay, so you can say I'm the one to blame."

"But it was because of my imperfect summon that your physical transmutation into this realm was delayed!"

I had memorised every small detailed that was needed for the summoning, but it wasn't enough. It resulted into a delay of the summoning. It's probably a first for a Master. I don't think that I deserve to be this person's Master.

"No, your summoning was indeed flawless, perfect, marvellous. I said I am at fault here. You had summoned me timely. Your magical energy had already formed my spirit body. It was I who had a bit of a problem forming into a physical body…"

So, she is saying that the ritual was a success, only her body hadn't become real in this world?

A magus, after completing the Servant summoning ritual, should have transferred their magical energy to give the Servant a physical form instantly in the real world, yet being myself, I resulted in summoning her in her spirit form.

Any way you look at it, it's not as it should be. Even a novice with little magic experience wouldn't pull something I did off.

"Actually, for an even stronger magus it's difficult to summon a being in a non-physical form from the bat. Keeping in their mana requires a lot of concentration on the catalyst and their flow of magical energy."

"You were trying your best at perfectly summoning me, and you managed to keep me in spirit form. You're an amazing Magus."

"Hey, don't be upset! I told you, your summoning was flawless, and here I am! For all that's worth, you could've ended up failing summoning me, that's the most important thing, isn't it?"

Never had I thought that I would get such compliments from someone that I had just met.

"Thank you, you flattered me. Your words were very touching, even though I don't deserve such generosity…

The woman in front of me smiles from my remark. I can tell she is a nice person. I didn't expect for a Servant to be this sweet with someone like me right after bringing them into this world.

"But, do you see me as someone capable of being your Master? I want to know your honest opinion, and… I won't mind or get that upset if you say that I am not."

Through this whole time, standing right in front of here, I've only been showing my weaknesses, how I can be easily think lowly of myself. It could ruin this, but I will have to accept her response anyway.

"You're a real perfectionist, aren't you Master?"

"Making the summoning ideal, trying to put on a good impression, you're trying a lot to impress a Servant. I wouldn't expect a Master to be like that. The first thing I thought after being summoned, was that I would right off go to fighting and not even getting the chance to speak back to the one who had summoned me, yet you are trying to ensure that you are the one sufficient for me."

I wouldn't say I am a perfectionist, maybe just a bit, but I wouldn't describe myself with that particular trait.

"Please, enough with the kind words if that is all. I would like to know if I am I worthy to lead you."

"Well, I wouldn't say lead…"

"…"

"… I wouldn't much appreciate for a human to boss me that much around… Yes."

I sight in relief behind my breath. It's done. Our contract has officially been forged. This woman here is now my Servant.

"Master, since I've pretty much agreed on our pact, would you mind showing me your Command Seals?"

"They're not on my hands as they should be."

"It sometimes occurs that a Master would have their Command Seals located somewhere else on the surface of their body."

I can't directly show her where my Command Seals are. That is impossible. How will I explain this to her?

"Is it on somewhere "private", where you wouldn't want to show me? Don't fret, there's nothing to be embarrassed about."

A slight smug appears on her face… I wouldn't want to know where she might think they are. I'm for sure glad something like that didn't happen to me.

"I… can't do that, because something had happened when the Grail was choosing its Masters and a slight defect had happened in the choosing."

"I can sense that you are in possession of Command Seals, so that is good enough on establishing our contract. I was just curious where they were located."

"It… isn't anywhere on my skin."

"Had some kind of object been used for the Command Seals then…?"

"It's on my brain…

"… That is certainly… unusual. A Master having the Command Crests located on their organ, especially on such an important one. That is indeed interesting."

"Well, I wouldn't want to cut off your scalp just for that, I do believe in your words…"

Suddenly, the female Servant stops in her near end sentence. What surprised her that much to stop?

"I know it's unusual, I can't even know how they look like, or how they look like. My brain is still functioning normally, so I don't think it received any particular damage from them, though I can't say for sure what would happen if I had used them."

Using them might result in… anything actually. Either from nothing, to damaging my brain tissue, which may even lead to my own death. These will have to be used as a last resort, or until the second one where I am sure what wouldn't result from using one.

"By the way, did you use the free time that you had when I had left to charge the candles with your own magical energy? I don't come down here much, so I use blue since it saves it."

"Yes… I had actually used the magical energy that I had when you summoned me, so technically I used yours."

"Anyway, would you mind if we would go somewhere a bit more lighter than here?"

"Oh! Not at all! I should've taken you upstairs as soon as I had met you. You're probably bored of being here in this one place. It does feel like a dungeon."

"No… Yes, I would prefer to be somewhere with a more natural light source if you may."

"Light source… Umm, very well."

* * *

I decided to bring her into my parent's bedroom, which has been remodelled into a guest room. I barely set foot in here, usually to tidy it up when I am planning on having a guest over, which happens very rarely.

"Master, why did you bring me into this room? Have you planned on doing a mana transfer right after my summoning? It's a good precaution, yet…"

"NO! That's not what I had intended to do! This room just has the most comfortable sofas in the house, so I had thought you would want to talk here."

Yet instead the female Servant is sitting with her legs crossed on the bed, while I take one of the two sofas.

"I'll be providing you this room for your stay if needed, so please, make yourself however you would like…"

Now that I remember, I didn't ask her what Servant she is?

"Master, you didn't really introduce yourself when we met. How should I address to you? Calling you Master would be a bit confusing, wouldn't it?"

"That's right, where are my manners…"

Matasa Gorichi, the heir of the Gorichi family. Please address me however you would like.

"Matasa… Master Matasa… Matasa the Master… Don't you kind of think that it sounds good?"

"I… don't know. If that is how you would prefer to call me, then please go ahead."

"No, I was just joking a bit, it was just that Matasa and Master have the same first letter that is all, Matasa it is then!"

"A heir, huh? Walking through this mansion I could already tell you were wealthy."

"Umm, can you tell me what class' spirit are you?"

"Huh? Don't you already know? You did summon me, so you would only know what class I am."

"Sorry, but I don't. I summoned the Heroic Spirit in random, so I wouldn't really know that."

"Hmm…"

"I have a nice idea, if you are up for it?"

"What is it?"

"Try guessing what class I am. Three strikes and you lose."

"What happens if I lose?"

"Nothing. I just made it up, but let's see how well you can distinguish a Servant just by looking at their clothing."

The unknown Servant rises up from the bed to give me a better look at her clothing. I can't really tell from her clothing. She isn't wearing any armour, so it's unlikely she is one of the Knight classes.

The one thing I can't really look back from is that miniature top hat on her head. It's not right in the middle, a bit moved to the right. How is that even holding? It doesn't seem as if it would be held down, it's just sitting on top of there being supported by her head.

"Could you perhaps be the Caster class Servant?"

"What would make you think such a ridiculous assumption like that?"

I'm a bit hesitant at first, as I thought that if I stated my reason, she would maybe get mad at me.

"Well, you're clothing don't seem very much for fighting at close range, and that hat that you are wearing is a bit peculiar…"

"Just so you know, I didn't choose to look like this at all. The Grail made me with these clothing items when I was summoned, so I had no part in these items. And I can hold myself in melee combat, I am a Servant after all."

Shoot, I was wrong about that. I hope she doesn't think that I was slightly making fun of how she looked. She is a Servant, so she is supposed to look a bit unusual on the outside.

"Assassin."

"Correct. Yes, I am the Assassin class Servant."

"So I will have to call you Assassin?"

She nods.

So her name, well, not name, but she is The Servant of the Assassin class- Servants that are skilled in quick executions.

"So we have finally formally greeted each other, Matasa. I will be looking forward to your expertise and leading in the Holy Grail War."

"Yes, same for me as well. It's a pleasure greeting you, Assassin."

Finally being able to know about the Servant which I have summoned, I feel a bit happier than earlier.

Though this whole time, from when we were at the basement and Assassin suddenly stopped talking in her conversation… yes, I remember that, she seems a bit more, observant of me. Right as we met, she seemed pleased on meeting me, her Master, but now she seems more suspicious of me.

"Assassin, was there something specific about that you wanted to ask of me here? You may ask me whatever you like, I will be happy to answer, because I wish that our relationship may be more than a regular Master and Servant relationship."

Whatever she may ask, I will only answer, after all, she, Assassin, is my Servant.

"Master, I know this will seem as an unusual question coming from someone like myself, but how did the summoning take magical energy wise?"

That's not that unusual, though it isn't just regular.

Though is it that why she's been a bit tensed about? Is it that important for her to know? I would think she would actually already know that and I wouldn't need to answer it, but I don't want to point it out and sound rude.

"I was required to use more magical energy in your summoning than I had expected, and I ended up almost draining it completely. I don't really know if it was just a mistake on my part, or that summoning you had needed that much of magical energy."

It was worth all of my mana. Summoning a Servant was my biggest priority, and I don't regret using that much to give her form, besides, it should be recharged completely in a couple of days.

"Isn't the Assassin class one that you can summon right of the bat if you did the certain requirements for it? Assassin, I'm a bit sorry to say this again, I know I said it earlier, but your summoning was completely random. I had no idea what class Servant I was going to be summoning."

"Do you regret summoning me then? Are you not satisfied with my class?"

"No! Not at all! I didn't really care for much of the Servant's class, all I care about is that I actually accomplished in summoning you. I'm satisfied with what I got. I'm just stating that even looking past the certain "may be" mistake that I did in your summoning, I'm also looking at other unusual parts of it."

The whole ritual did go south, even though it ended up being a success: I used up most of my magical energy, summoned Assassin in her spirit form instead of physical and summoned a Servant of the Assassin class, even though certain requirements are needed if you wanted to summon a Servant of that particular class. Same can be for a Berserker class Servant, but I'm talking about Assassin here.

"Don't you see this as a bit of unusual? I know that you said that it wasn't my mistake, but I am starting to actually think otherwise, all of the details are in order, though altered."

Shouldn't she now something about it, at the least something of most importance? It's her who was summoned after all.

I know it's not that much of an important matter, but it is still in my mind, I want to know the reasons. Either it was my failure, or something a bit different.

"You should just stop blaming yourselves so much, it's isn't your fault at all. The summoning was flawless with zero abnormalities, and you had made zero mistakes in it, it was a splendid Servant summoning."

"… . If you say so, thank you, Assassin. I'm happy to have summoned you."

She slightly blushes from my reply. I don't deserve her praise, so I should at the least thank her.

"Oh, you didn't answer my question before? Why did you so suddenly wanted to leave the basement?"

"Why would the place we would be getting to know each other be a basement?" or " Well I'm kind of a guest. You should at least offer some place more inviting than this". I expected her reason to sound something like that, if she hadn't been so, how should I say, peculiar when we were conversing and she had suddenly stopped."

"I don't know if this is going to sound weird, but I'll say it. I wanted to get a bit of a better look at you, and to examine your system."

System? Does she mean the amount of magical energy in my body?

"Do you mean my magical energy that I had left after your summoning? What made you so interested in it? I told you that I almost ended up using all of it. Do you not believe me?"

"I absolutely believe in what you had said. It just caught my attention. I told you it would sound unusual, but you."

It does sound unusual. It may only be my assumption, but I think she is hiding something from me.

"Assassin, you can tell me anything, don't be shy about it. If there is something that you think is wrong, please, state it with courage."

She takes a second to gather her thoughts and deciding on her response while I wait for not too long. If there is something weird she spotted in me, I want to know immediately.

"Matasa, first of all, I would prefer if you weren't so formal with me. It's too early for your age to act like an adult, and you are my Master. I would prefer if you acted not like a God's-made gentleman."

"Are calling me immature? I only wanted to be welcoming and… polite to you, that's how I always treat my guests! I'm very sorry Assassin, how would you like me to act then?"

"Just see me as how you would see a friend. It's good that you are well educated in etiquette with guests, but we will be working together in a war."

"I… I only meant to do it for today! It's my first time meeting you… so I would only act like that. Besides, you're the one dressed like a noble here, yet you're so relaxed…"

"I didn't choose to wear this kind of clothing! I told you before! Don't assume ridiculous stuff like me wearing what a snobbish man would wear…"

I'm more embarrassed than ever now, I've put such a pathetic impression on her through my mannerism. Well, at least I'm not the only one embarrassed here, so I quickly calm down and get back to topic.

"That wasn't what I wanted to know! Assassin, please tell me if there is something wrong, or… I'll use my Command Seal!"

"And risk your life for a reason like that? There is no need for that. Very well, are you ready to hear for what I have to say?"

"I've been ready the whole time! Please, tell me."

"Are you sure that you used up all of your magical energy during the summoning?"

"I said that I used up most of it, but I guess that I could say yes."

"You're not lying to me, are you?"

"You said that you trusted me! Are you changing your mind? What I have been saying is only the truth!"

"All right, all right, I believe you. I won't doubt you Master."

"Then state your words."

"Ok, I did honestly doubt you for a bit on having used up most of your mana, but even with the left amount, it is indeed a huge amount that you have left. It is interesting how much magical energy you are able to store in your body, Matasa."

"… Is that it? All you wanted is to make sure that you knew how much magical energy I am able to store in my body?"

"That's correct. You truly must me a powerful magician with that much magical energy."

"Th… thank you very much, Assassin. Please stop being so sweet to me though."

Never in my life I thought that a Servant, or anyone in that matter, would praise me so much. I'm truly lucky to have Assassin as my Servant.

You can't really judge a book by its cover. From looking at Assassin, you would think that she would be really snobbish and, maybe strict person, but it's quite something else. She's caring, especially for someone like myself.

"I honestly don't know why you have you been so praiseful of me. I just summoned you and the only words that you are telling are compliments towards me. I didn't make that big of an expected impression anyway."

"I can see anything bad about you from appearance or behavior. That whole "formal interaction" put me in a good impression. I'm very fortunate to have been chosen by a Master like you."

"I haven't been the only one trying. Wait a second, was this your whole scheme of trying to make a good impression of yourself?"

"… Absolutely,-with a smug smile on here face,- but what I said was the truth as well."

Really, you can't judge this woman by only her appearance. It will indeed be fun and interesting in getting to know her better.

"Anyway Master, just looking at you is putting me a bit at an edge."

"What do you mean?"

"You look as if you are about to pass out. This is you residence so you may sleep on the sofa if you want, I won't stop you from doing that."

"But I'm not that tired, I can still be up for another hour or two."

"Master, it's three in the morning, and don't you try to play dumb with me. We will have plenty of time in the morning when you have rested. I won't be going nowhere from the plot of your residence. I will always be near you if needed."

"Do you really not mind though?"

I do feel a bit fatigued, but I wouldn't want to leave her just because of that and have her wait until morning, even if it's only for some hours.

"Not at all. I wouldn't want my Master to get ill or worse. I'll be outside patrolling the area around the mansion if you need me."

She rises up elegantly from the side of the bed, turning around and with that cape of hers blowing in my direction.

"Don't you need to rest too? This is your room from now after all."

"Thank you for the kind offer, but I won't be needing it that much. Have a good restful night, Master."

With that, she vanishes in mid-air completely from my field of vision. Now that I've seen it, she is definitely an Assassin. She melted right into the atmosphere and disappeared without a trace or anything, as if I had blinked and she just vanished. A specialty of the Assassin class Servants.

I'll still have this room assigned to her if she needs it for any particular reason though, so I'll leave it as it is.

Three in the morning, huh? I'll have to wake up in three hours then. I should at the least get some sort of sleep. Coming in to school half asleep would be quite embarrassing.

* * *

Seems that Assassin was right, I do feel tired, more than I had thought actually. I had a couple of moments when making the way to my bedroom where I had thought that I would pass out on the floor and make myself on the carpeting, but I was fortunate enough to have the determination of arriving successfully to my bedroom.

She knows how to read people, or I am just an easy one to be read…. hope it's the first trait.

Entering my room I immediately fall onto the bed, without the thought of changing into my sleep wear. I'm too fatigued to even stand up right now.

I haven't done much physical work today. The reason is that I had used a large unnecessary amount of magical energy that left me almost empty of energy. With some rest I should become stable.

So… The Assassin class Servant- the one I was able to summon through an unpredicted case.

These Servants are highly skilled in quick executions of both Servants and Masters, though their combat skills aren't very much to boast about. Could Assassin actually be able to take down a Servant? Would she need to stealthily assassinate a Servant, or would she be able to fight in close courters with a Servant such as Saber or Lancer?

While we were in the guestroom, I saw a glimpse of something large attached to the back of her jacket, right under her cape, what seemed to look like some kind of holster that would perhaps be for a weapon.

It may just as well be an accessory to her apparel that is only part of her Servant outfit, or something that is related to her when she was still alive…

Noooo! How idiotic of me to forget on asking her of her identity! That should have been the first thing I should've asked her.

But oh well. I have until morning 'till I can speak to her again. If she won't mind I'll ask her right away. I'm a bit curious of who she may be, well, actually a lot curious.

Another strange thing is that Assassin didn't speak up about the catalyst I had used in summoning her.

I put my fingers to my neck to check if I had not accidentally dropped my priced possession yet again… good, it's still there.

Well, maybe she just forgot or didn't really have the opportunity since I was asking her so many questions, or just mistook it for an irrelevant piece of jewelry, though that seems unlikely, she should be able to recognize an item that was related to her.

Seems that I haven't completely finished knowing about her yet. So then it's settled that I will have to interrogate her during breakfast.

She seems nice, and friendly, and I feel as if I've gotten to know about her more than I would have expected.

And I had ended up using such a huge amount of magical energy is summoning her, she can only be one of the strongest Servants in this War.

Though I can't judge her by just her personality, she is a Servant after all. I'll know how good she is once I get the chance to see her in combat…

That's right, I'll… have to kill and spill the blood of others.

The Holy Grail War is a game to the death with other magus, meaning it is a killing game- with only the survivor winning.

I was so excited about summoning a Servant that I had forgotten about the rules of the game.

And also that I have summoned a soon to be killer, with a chance of me becoming one as well.

I've never actually taken a life before, would it actually be easy?

 **Stab them in the heart, shoot them in the head, cut their throats, it's easy as it sounds. Killing, taking a life, ending one's existence- an obligation for a Master in order to proceed in the Death Game.**

That is why Assassin is here. She's here to fight, and I am here to give her orders and provide support, but if a time comes when there is no other option- a time where my life might be in danger and I would have to protect myself, I would have to…

 **Spill the blood of the attacker.**

Accept my fate. Accept my death. I am not here to… fight. Assassin is, that's her role in the war. Being an Assassin, she is probably experienced taking another's life, that is who Assassins are- experienced killers.

I wouldn't be able to take a life. It's not that I am not capable of doing it, I am able to defend myself against an attacker.

Also, there is the reason for what am I actually going to be fighting for.

Once all of the other six Servants and Masters have been eliminated, the Holy Grail shall appear and grant the winner the victor one wish. It way be anything they can hope to desire.

But, that isn't at all what I am actually participating in this game at all. I'm not much interested in this omnipotent chalice.

Never in the Gorichi family history have we won the Holy Grail. We are a noble family that has lived on for many centuries, as long as the Tohsakas or the Einzberns. Originally we were the most known magus family in Scotland, though eventually my ancestors had changed it's home location to Japan.

And unfortunately, I am the only known living member of the family- the youngest and the only hope for what seems to be, the Gorichi family name, whose goal of obtaining the Grail has been for many years. So as the last heir, it is my obligation to add this achievement to the book.

I must regain my family's pride as a magi bloodline and establish ourselves as at the least the winners of one Holy Grail War.

As the only current living relative, I am taking quite a huge risk in competing, which may once and for all end the Gorichi family bloodline for good, and only be remembered as an extinct family of magi.

To be exact, my goal for winning the Holy Grail is to renown the Gorichi name, and to do that, I must come victorious in the War.

That is my obligation. Through coincidence I have been chosen as part of it, and I will only proceed into it, to try and complete the goal at the end.

And If I succeed, I will have achieved my task, with something else added to it- the second reason for why I am participating.

Surely it will not be an easy game. Other Masters want to obtain the Holy Grail as much as me, actually, even more than me, so they are determined and ready to kill others, including me, without hesitation.

I'm not the one to be killing them though, Assassin is. I will have to use her assistance in my goal of obtaining the omnipotent device.

Or she may just die from another Servant, which I wouldn't want to actually happen. I like Assassin, and it would put me in a depressed mood if she had fallen, so I will have to be smart and careful to ensure that she makes it to the end with me, if possible.

She will be the only person that will be able to protect me from other participants. I will try as much as I am able to defend myself obviously, but I am not willing to take another's life, unless they are another Servant.

Servants are spirits, so they are already dead. It doesn't really matter if they die in the war, they will only go back to whence they came from, back to the afterlife once they are defeated and evicted from the War, with only their Master left.

If possible, I would like for the Master not to die as well, but if there is no other possible choice, Assassin will have to finish and eliminate the enemy. I am not able to take one's life for my own benefits.

Assassin, will have to, even if I don't really like the sound of that, will have to take care most of the dirty work.

If I am fortunate enough, I may actually make it to the end and be victorious with Assassin. I will be given one wish.

My wish is a very simple one. It isn't very meaningful or major, and it will not affect anyone else badly. It's something that I have actually been wanting to happen… for a very long time…

As I had said, it's a very simple wish, one of the most easiest to be granted. In fact, my wish could be granted even without having to obtain the Grail, I could even have it become real this instant. The only reason is that, I do not deserve to have it become true. By winning the War, I will have the right to make it come true, I will finally be able to achieve what I have… actually wanted.

It will… only affect me… no one else, but me. I want it to become true, I want to…

 **To die.**

Yes, my wish for the Holy Grail is that. If I do manage to obtain it at the end, it is for my life to come to its end.

I already know that it is not normal wanting to die. Every person should hold they're life dearest to them. It's the best gift that life has ever given to them.

But for me…

I've never seen worth in myself. To others I may seem like a friendly and generous friend, but to me, myself, I feel as if I am not supposed to… exist.

This life that I've been living was filled with no achievements that I would be proud of, only things that have made me, happy, but they are only selfish emotions that I am able to feel, just a feeling that is there for my well-being as a person. An emotion isn't a reason I should be living for.

I am prohibited of taking my own life until I have achieved the Grail, or have died in the hands of another Servant or Master.

I'm the only one left- the only living member of the Gorichi family, and yet I don't deserve to exist.

I doubt I will be missed by anyone. No one would care if such a mistake like me would bite the dust. I would much rather if I was forgotten, just erased form everyone who has ever seen me.

There is no meaning in life for me, other than making my family known again.

And yet, my fate will stay the same.

I'll either die during the Holy Grail War by a Master, or I will win and use my one precious wish to take away my life, to sacrifice it for the Holy Grail.

And no one must know about this. A person's first instinct of hearing someone wanting to take their life is to try to stray them away from that kind of path.

So no one under any circumstances must know this. I cannot tell my Servant about it either. Assassin seems to… care for me… only as a Servant for Master.

In history, it should just be stated that the Gorichi family in their last stead managed to obtain the Grail. It should not matter who may have done it, only that it has been accomplished.

I will rise my family's name back to fame. To become renown as a family of magi yet again.

No matter the causes. No matter what I must really do.

Whatever may happen, my fate has already been decided. By the end of the war, I will be dead.


	3. Falling

It was something new to do, but it was only expected to be a bit dull to attend, especially for a preschooler, but it was only necessary to do.

The other family wanted to see of their new rival's heir in one of their so called "peaceful arrangements", where they would discuss about their new discoveries in the world where the child was going to be a part of when he has reached a certain age. A numberless amount of training and studies were only awaiting him in the future. He didn't understand much of what the adults were talking about, but he did hear of the discussion himself. The only things he had heard were compliments from various attendants, especially the noble women, where most had mistook him for a little girl because of those cute hairclips he had in his hair.

The father insisted him to remove them before attending, but he was rebellious and didn't agree to his father's wishes. "I need to always wear them!" he said frantically. The father didn't want to bother with his son, he didn't give it thought anymore and allowed him, as long as he had worn his blouse and dress shorts during the event.

The moment he had gotten there, it was only expected to seem very dull for his standards. There was no one close to his age that he could spot, mostly adults in their mid thirties to mid forties, not even a teenager in sight, then again, why would a teen want to talk to a preschooler anyway? He knew instantly that he would be damned with boredom.

During the first hours of the event, he had only stayed by his father's side, trying to not be left alone in the crowd of people. The man himself was certainly annoyed with it, having to multitask of discussing various discoveries with other attendants and tending to his child's needs.

Even the young boy could see that his father wasn't happy with it, he was rather understandable for his age. The meeting itself was rather mundane, the music there was only old classical and the food seemed so exquisite that he didn't even want to dare and touch it, not knowing if there is a certain way to eat the appetizers. Even though it was the start of Winter, he didn't much mind going outside, out where he doesn't have to receive compliments from strange old noble women, out of his father's way, out of everyone else's sight.

Despite the bit low temperatures, he didn't mind them at all, he was wearing those expensive suit shorts at the time, which left half of his legs exposed to the cold weathers. Though even through the resistance, it was only a matter of time before he had started shivering.

He had planned to stay the remainder of the whole meeting outside. Luckily for him, it wasn't snowing that day, so he had at least that going for him. Eventually wandering for about ten minutes, he had found a quite nice view of the whole city from a cliff right next to the sea. Adults would've never let him be there, since it was a rather dangerous area to leave a young child all by themselves. The cliff wasn't steep, but it was still rather risky being there.

Right next to the cliff was a rather large tree. It was roughly away from the other ones surrounding the area. It was pushed away, as if being secluded from every other tree there, being so pushed into the cliff, or at the least near it.

That's where he had sat and waited, waited for the hours to pass until he could finally go home. The one thing he could think about was his mother. Even though he had knew she was in good care, he was still worrying about her, wanting to know if she was truly doing all right, he thought about that while he was sitting there, staring into the nicely lit spectacle of the city before him, starting to shake as the winds started to pick up. There were occasions when he had thought that the best decision would be to go back, but to go back where he would only be harassed and feeling awkward next to all those famous magi, he would rather stay in the cold.

It was the first time where his father would take him with himself to attend something, even though he had known that it was obviously going to be dull, he hadn't known it was going to be that much of a boredom.

A lot had wanted to see the new heir of the Gorichi's, the young one who would continue the family legacy, and they were glad to see such an adorable girl, because most thought that that was who he was. His father probably had a difficult time explaining to everyone that wasn't what they had thought. It was hard to believe for most, but they didn't give it too much worry, they did not really care if it was a boy or a girl.

From one look one that, smooth youthful face and those pretty grey eyes, from that silvery white hair, and mostly because of those hair accessories, mostly everyone had thought that the heir would grow to be a beautiful lady magus, but it had unfortunately come to their surprise that it wouldn't actually be that.

He regretted coming here, being looked differently at everyone by how he looked. From then, he would rather not attend anymore of these meetings ever again, but it wouldn't matter, since it was fairly his father's decision to decide if he has to or doesn't in the near future.

Despite the fact that his father asked him to not wander far too off from the mansion, he had went quite a bit away from it, almost nearing a nearby park, luckily it was night and cold, so no people were found there, he was all alone by himself for the most part, trying to bear the cold and endure the wait of going back home, until sometime later, he heard one footstep. Most would only think that a branch fell or something like that, but he instead had instantly reacted to it. Maybe someone had come looking for him, or something else was there, something that he wouldn't really want to deal with at the moment. To avoid it, he tried hiding himself more behind the tree, trying to climb into it to perhaps hide fro the certain someone who had came there, but it didn't matter anyway, since they were already aware of the child's presence. He had known it already once he had heard:

"Hey dummy, you forgot this."

The next thing he was met was with his jacket that he had left at the mansion, being thrown to him from a distance. He was certainly surprised by that. Overlooking it, he looked to his front, and saw a certainly unsuspected individual, or should it be said, girl.

"I saw you leave the mansion. Good thinking, that was a certainly boring meeting, the most boring one I had been dragged into so far. I saw you forget the jacket you had on you when you had came in. I spent the last half hour looking for you. Lucky I didn't found you frozen or something haha. My name's Rin by the way."

Even though that day was expected to be dull, it was one which he would only remember forever.

* * *

 _Introduction_

* * *

 _Day 2_

* * *

 _Falling_

* * *

"This is absolutely delightful! Thank you very much Assassin!"

"I'm very glad. Even with the new generation of appliances, I was able to use them correctly and make it as how I know."

I've hit luck by having summoned Assassin. She makes a better cup of Earl Grey tea than I would ever be able to. This taste so delightful, I even had a bit of doubt in her by only boiling the water and mixing it with the leaves that I had stored somewhere in the depths of the cupboard, since it isn't one that I much prefer, though with Assassin serving it, this beverage has probably reached top ten in my favourite warm beverages.

The temperature is at a perfect point where you are able to drink it. The bitterness is not too overwhelming, and its aroma is just euphoric. I've already had three cups of this delicious drink.

"Please don't burn your tongue off while drinking it Master."

While I try to drink as much of it as possible, Assassin is sitting on the other side of the coffee table with the first cup that she had made for herself. Only half of it is empty. She's taking her time with it.

"Do not worry. I have a high tolerance to heat, so this barely affects me. I would probably be able to drink it as it was boiling."

"For some reason, I doubt that." She says that before taking another sip.

"Though why did you decide on making this blend? There were quite a lot of other bags of leaves that you could've used."

"I was not much familiar with the other kind, so I went with the regular black tea instead. And I wanted to know how you would like it, since that was in the back of the cupboard."

"You were risking quite a bit by making it with those, they were in the back for a reason. What If I had not liked them?"

"You would've disposed of them then. Why keep something that you don't like?"

"I may have just forgotten about them. They were pretty far back in there."

'But you are drinking it now. You've had seconds every time, so you are enjoying it.

She sips her cup again, narrowing her eyes at me. Is this a debate I am sensing from my dear Servant?

"What If I would feel bad for not drinking it, after someone else had gone through so much in preparing it for me?"

"You would've stopped after the first one. Why go for seconds at something you dislike?"

"Courtesy is a way to a guest's comfort zone, my dear. I abide to my family's reputation as nobles, and keep such manners within the walls of this manor to all guests. May you require a refill?"

"Where did such mannerism come from my Master? Has the beverage triggered such politeness?"

I chuckle my tea filled mouth from the reply, almost pouring at back into the cup. I would've not expected Assassin to say it in such a way, it's a bit humorous.

"Hehe, and you praise yourself as a noble individual. I know my etiquette, these looks correspond to it…. . I'll take you up on that refill though."

"It's rude to change the subject, you know. Do you honestly know your etiquette?

"I'm not a pure noble, but I do know most of how to act like one. Besides, you were the one to bring this unnecessary debate in the first place. I just wanted to get to know my Master better."

"Well, you should know that I have no complaints about your tea making skills. You said so before that you aren't accustomed to the Japanese style tea leaves that I have in the front of the cupboard."

"I… didn't want to make a bad impression and failing in making something new, so I had resorted in preparing something which I am familiar with."

"And you did quite a good job. At least you don't add milk or sugar to the tea."

"I gag when I see such an act. Such a beverage should stay pure, not having any other foreign matter combined into it."

"Hahah, I guess we do have some things in common."

"I believe that this is only part of things that we have in common with, Mata-chan."

"This is the last serving. You have the honours."

"You had enough anyway, so finish your current cup already. And thank you very much."

She is true to her words, even with her mannerism. She seems to know how to be polite in a situation, but only if she wanted to. Having known me for even just a bit, I feel as if we have already established a solid bond.

"Assassin, I am weary that you have very little knowledge of how I am capable at being a Master, especially yours. This is my first time participating in the Holy Grail War, and I have very little idea of what I should be aiming for to prosper in it… but I will definitely try my best at being the best Master that I am able to be."

I don't know about my current capabilities. While being currently, as I could say, crippled in my position, I have to result in other measures in advancing. I will have to be the one that gives out the orders.

"A lot of first time Masters would be that way, so it is not a worry. I believe that you will be a capable, actually, an expert Master that will command me."

Again with her compliments. That may actually be part of her being polite to someone like me, though she speaks out of her heart.

"You've taken quite a lot of precautions in summoning me from what you had said, even after completing in bringing me into this realm. Trying to put on a good impression so that I would be able to trust you more, you seem very trustworthy as a person, even implying to make me stronger by accomplishing a mana transfer, though I have no idea how that would be possible…"

"I told you that I wasn't implying on doing that! It was part of me being generous and providing you a room to stay!"

The tea is not too hot, so I only blush from that kind of remark.

"I thought the tea wasn't too hot for you, or is it that I have made you embarrassed yet again? Gosh Master, you are quite adorable when you are embarrassed, umpf…!"

"I… I thought you were supposed to be kind!"

"I am, at the moment I am giving you compliments, for having summoned someone like me to an adorable little Master like yourself."

She is right now teasing me with her words. I've only known this woman for less than a day and already is she acting like we have known each other for a while. Though… I guess that it means that we are rapidly getting to know each other better. I calm myself down and have the last sip of the contents of my cup.

"Assassin, you said something earlier that I don't understand by what you had meant."

"Ohhh, what is it that you didn't understand, Master?"

"Well you said before, when you were talking about…"

I feel really embarrassed to say this, but what she had said did piqued my interest. I pause and rethink if it is actually needed to ask of her.

"Come on, Matasa. Spit it out. Don't be shy. If you are insisting that you do want to do a mana transfer, then…"

"No! It's not that at all! It's not what I was planning to ask you at all!"

I spot a mischievous smile on her from across the table. She is enjoying this. It makes the situation even worse. I take a deep breath.

"You said… that if we were to do… a… mana transfer… you didn't know how that would work."

Oh Lord. I asked her such an embarrassing question. I want to die now. Where is a knife when I need one?

"Well, of course. A mana transfer would work normally between members of the opposite gender. You would need male to provide the necessary magical energy into the one who would need it. Between males, maybe that would actually work…"

"Why did you stop?"

After saying that she stopped in her tracks and her cheeks turned red.

"Ahem. So getting to the point, I wouldn't really know how a mana transfer would work between two females, since none of the both can provide a "mana source" to the other."

"… ."

"What? You wanted to know my theory. Unless you have proof that it would work between the both of us."

"… Assassin, what are you implying here?"

"I'm not implying anything at all. I told you, being women I have doubts that a mana transfer between the both of us would work.

She continues sipping her tea casually while I look at her with an embarrassed expression. I put my cup down and rise up from the seat.

"I'm not a woman!"

That get's her attention. She looks at me straight while her lips are still touching the cup.

"What do you mean you are not a woman? Do you identify yourself as a male, or are you some kind of weird individual that identifies themselves as something else. I will not judge you for that Master, I will respect your wishes."

"I don't identify myself as anything! No wait! I do!, I'm a…!"

"For Christ sake Master. You are overreacting while we are having such a nice conversation with each other, and you are practically ruining it. Please, sit down!"

Assassin raises her voice a bit, which leaves me a bit frightened. I sit back down on the armchair and calm myself down to her request.

"Good. Now that you have calmed down, tell me what you wanted to say."

I would've honestly thought that she would now. Wouldn't a Servant know a Master's gender, or is she just horrible at identifying someone's sex?

"Assassin, I thought that it would be easy for you to see it. Yes, people did sometimes mistake me for my gender, and I will not think badly of you for misunderstanding. But please know, that I am in fact, male."

Her expression changes as I say that. She resumes looking at me for a couple of seconds.

"It perhaps does seem as a surprise to you, but yes, I am a boy."

I hope that it didn't take her too much as a surprise. I do contain some feminine features, but she should know who I truly am.

Doesn't seem like she took it that well. Assassin rises up from the armchair after putting her now empty tea cup onto the coffee table, and goes to the window, facing her back to me.

"… ."

"I hope that this doesn't change your opinion of me, and that it will not change…"

"Bhbhbhbh…Bhahahahahahahahahahaaha! HAhahaAHhahaha!"

That fact seemed to have gotten to her, in a much more different way though. Assassin holds at her stomach, having trouble breathing through her hysterical laugh.

"Hahahaha… Oh Master…. Hahahaha… that is definitely… funny… a boy?! With that large of a pelvis… Mfffffhahahaha!"

"Don't make fun of the size of my hips! I know they're not normal, but you don't have to point it out in such a rude manner… ."

"Hahahaha, oh… hehe..heeeeh…!"

She stops to catch her breath back. I sit calmly, until she decides to approach me.

"Prove it then. Prove that what you are saying is true."

"I thought that you would believe me! You said that you would trust in me."

"Matasa, I have never heard something as ridiculous as that ever in my life. It would even be easy for a young child to tell if one is a man or a woman, and you definitely don't look like one."

"How am I supposed to make you believe in me then…?"

"You should now exactly how you can prove it, Master."

Before I am able to finish my question, I feel Assassin's hand, pressing onto my chest.

"Oh, so you are a boy."

And takes it off.

"Well, you might just be a girl with a really flat chest, though I would've felt at least something there, but all I can feel is fat."

"Why… Why are you calling me fat?! I work out a lot, I…"

"The only thing that I am able to spot with enough muscle is those hips of yours, which definitely resembles a woman's. You must do a lot of squatting exercises, but you shouldn't just focus all of your attention into that if you want to have a flat male chest."

"I… I… ."

Assassin, you're so mean! Why must you point that out to me, that even though I don't have breasts, my chest resembles a slightly bigger A cup size.

"You only wanted to get a feel of them, didn't you?"

"Don't be ridiculous. I just wanted to make sure. It was good for me to investigate that area, or more people would become confused and use my poor Master to their ill advantages."

You're so mean! You could've at least asked me to show you some means of identification instead of touching my chest. Though my student identification does state that I am female. Curse you manufacturers!

"I thought that it was pretty obvious that I am a man, with a very large pelvis.

"You were mistaken, and so were others."

And you.

"Not only was I a bit confused on that, you are also wearing jewelry and accessories that men don't really seem to wear. Those hair clips for instance, they bring out a lot of femininity in you. If you took them of…"

"No! I can't do that. I've been wearing them every single day since my younger years. They wear a gift from my mother, and I promised her that I would wear them."

I've been using a set of two hair clippers from when I can remember. They're practically become a part of me. I'm easily identified from the both of these. I know it's quite unusual for a male to wear such feminine accessories, but these have played a very big role in my life… also Tohsaka-senpai says that I look good in them, and if she likes me wearing them, then… I will only oblige.

"That is not all of which I wanted to say. That choker that you are wearing is almost the same as the hair clippers. It looks indeed beautiful on your neck, don't get me wrong, but it as well brings out a lot of feminine features in you, especially that kind of design."

"Assassin, I never take this off unless I am bathing. I even sleep in it. It's an accessory that I am prohibited from taking off. It's also a family heirloom, I mean this gemstone. I would wear it somewhere else, but I have become quite accustomed to it. I've been wearing it for longer than I can remember. Even if it does make me look more like a girl, then so be it."

Even if these do make me look a lot girlish, it is only a small sacrifice to make.

"You must be very serious with your looks and accessories, but it doesn't really matter to me, I will not stop you from doing what you like, especially if it doesn't harm you in any way. But you should definitely work on your chest."

"Please stop pointing out my chest. I will get to it, eventually."

"Well, you can do it after the war is over. Who knows, maybe tricking our enemies into thinking that you are a girl might do us a favour, and…"

Everyone is accustomed to me looking like this, and those who don't just think that I am a girl. I've never really been bullied about it, everyone had been nice to me about it, with just a bit of teasing that Assassin does, mostly from Tohsaka-senpai. I've been wearing these for many years, especially the brooch, it's an important item to me…

"Assassin, I forgot to ask you something after I had summoned you yesterday.

"Oh, and what may that be, due tell, I will be happy to answer it for you. Mata-chan."

"Do you by any chance recognize what this is?"

I pull some of my hair back to reveal the brooch with the gemstone which is on my choker so that Assassin is able to see, pointing at it with my index finger.

"That is indeed a very nice looking gemstone, though I have seen many kinds of those during my previous life, so I don't really now about it."

"I'm not only talking about the gemstone, but the whole brooch. Are you in any way familiar with it?"

She puts her hands on the table and leans in forward to get a better luck onto the accessory on my neck.

"I'm sorry, but can't recognize it at all. I have seen a lot of those kinds of gems, but I may just have forgotten about it."

"It doesn't matter then, I only wanted to know if you were familiar with it. You would've known about it."

Quite peculiar. I had used the gemstone as a catalyst, yet Assassin doesn't know about it. She may have just forgotten because of my imperfect summon.

"I'm not exactly much for jewelry, but that is a fine flawless gem, and it does look very nice on you."

"This thing has practically become a part of my body. I take it everywhere with me, though it does sometimes tend to slip out of its holder and I end up being distressed."

"That is very risky of you to do then. If it is so valuable to you, then why not just put it away somewhere safe where you would have no risk of using it. That gemstone also seems quite expensive, and would for sure attract some people's attention."

"If that was the case, I would run away from the thief so that they wouldn't be able to take it. Fortunately for me, something like that has never happened."

"Well, it does blend a bit into your hair, so it would be a bit difficult for others to spot it."

"I'm not much for particularly interested in jewelry as well, but I only wear this because I have to."

I don't have much a need to be flashy and covered in different kinds of luxurious jewelry. Of course I am able to afford such things, but I have no interests in them. I am satisfied with the ones that I am wearing right now.

Now I am wondering if there was something else that was accidentally included in the summoning ritual. Assassin said that she is not kin on jewelry, meaning it's a very low chance if she had possession of the gemstone. Didn't something get in the way and switched out the gemstone catalyst?

"Well, even if I was able to actually purchase any kind of jewelry, I wouldn't bother doing it. I'm not a typical woman that only covers herself in everything that is feminine, I hate those kinds of broads, acting only on a stereotype. I wasn't very rich either."

"Really? I thought you being a Heroic Spirit and such would mean that you were quite noble, even your clothing looks very genuine and noble looking."

"… I wouldn't particularly call myself a Heroic Spirit. I've never done any good for anyone. I am only a Servant because of what I had done in life, which got a lot of attention through history."

"Oh, and what exactly had you done? I'm interested in knowing more about it if you don't mind telling me of what made you a Servant."

"… ."

Assassin is giving me a quite frightening look. She seems a bit tensed, her eyes are widely opened, as if she just seen a ghost from looking at me.

"Assassin, is something wrong? Did I say something that you didn't want to hear…"

"No, it's just that… you've been asking me some strange questions until now, that I wouldn't expect from my Master, about my past and whether I know something that you yourself possess."

"I just wanted to get to know about you more, you are my Servant after all, we should be strengthening our bond with each other."

I don't mean to be rude to her, but Assassin has been acting a bit iffy, even yesterday, though it may just be part of her weird personality.

"Well, you wouldn't be asking facts about me when you already know them. I didn't take you for having such a short-term memory."

"I don't remember asking you such things. Those were quite important questions for me to ask of you, I would've definitely remembered them."

"Oh, so it seems. Then don't worry about it, I won't mind you asking them again. You perhaps wanted to know if the gemstone which you have on your neck is the item you had used as a catalyst in my summoning."

"Umm, yes. How did you know about that? Was I that obvious?"

"Not at all. You had asked me the same thing during the time right after summoning me."

Why do I not have memory of that? I would honestly remember questioning her that after the ritual.

"Instead of transferring your magical energy into the gemstone, a misalignments with your mana flow was intercepted, and instead it was transferred into this."

I failed to transfer the magical energy into the catalyst? But how, I was sure that it was focused right on the gemstone, it was even charged with the magical energy.

Though Assassin shows me that I was indeed wrong in thinking that the gem was the catalyst. From behind her back, she takes out a dagger out of the holster which I had caught a glimpse of during the night. So it is a dagger holster.

I recognize the item instantly. The peculiar dagger I had for an option to use as a catalyst, so this item was used to summon her.

"Are you familiar with this. Well, I wouldn't be surprised if you're not, after all, you do have a pretty short memory span, Master."

"Not at all, I… remember having it during the ritual, but I hadn't used this dagger is the catalyst. I could swear that I had used the gemstone instead."

I could have sworn that during the summoning I had established my mana flow in the brooch, not the dagger. I wasn't even holding it in my hand, nor was I focused on it. This whole situation has become a quite peculiar one.

"It could have just been an interference between multiple catalysts, though I may be wrong about that. Anyway, you instead had used my dagger as a catalyst in my summoning and ended up getting me…"

Assassin may be right. A second catalyst interfering with ones mana flow might have disrupted and transferred onto itself, giving physical presence to its owner, who apparently was Assassin.

But the gemstone ended up charged with magical energy after I had finished the ritual, so it means that it had also absorbed some of the magical energy from the mana flow, so how could the catalyst be the dagger mainly, when I had charged both the dagger and gemstone with magical energy, then both of them would've been the catalyst. Maybe it's that more mana was fused into the dagger instead of the brooch, even though my whole focus was on the gemstone which I was definitely holding.

" Assassin, is something the matter? You look a bit upset."

"Humpf! Nothing is wrong. Nothing at all…"

While I was busy contemplating and solving the current mystery, Assassin seemed a bit angry at something. She has a frown.

"Just that you were not intending on summoning only the best possible Servant from the Throne of Heroes, the most powerful Servant in all of the Holy Grail War, the most trustworthy and loyal partner that could possibly exist, and YOU had not planned on summoning me?! I'm very offended by it Master."

"But you said that you weren't a Hero."

"So?! I was still chosen to be summoned out of the Throne of Heroes because I am well known, but no, my Master had intended to summon some foolish snobbish man or woman who would probably not even lift a goddamn finger for a cup of tea and instead used their Master in fights while they just watched."

"That's not how my family would act! Assassin, you're being very mean to my ancestors and even me!"

"Because that is the truth. I'm just stating the obvious here, your ancestors were probs snobs. Look at this whole house, it's so noble it's almost an eyesore."

"I'm very sorry if you are mad at me. Yes, I had intended to summon someone other than you, but it all ended up being good, because I ended up with summoning you, and I am very grateful for that. Assassin, I told you that I am of most grateful to have you as my Servant."

"…"

She still refuses to look at me. If she doesn't forgive me, I may end up crying and begging for her forgiveness.

"Very well, I forgive you. I believe in your words, but first I want to hear something from you…"

"You are the best Servant ever Assassin, I am honoured to have you as my partner in the Holy Grail War."

"Hmmhm, likewise Mata-chan. I'll prove to you of my powers. You will be left astonished by my... ."

She stops once more in her words.

"Ahem, anyway, you know of what I mean. I have nothing else to say, only show you of my awesomeness. I will defeat every foe that stands in our way."

"And I'll assist you in doing that with everything I am able to donate to our teamwork."

During this whole morning process, mixed with nice and bad discussions, it was rather lovely to spend a morning drinking hot beverages with someone new, making a new friend at the end. I'm very glad to have met Assassin.

I'm not complaining at all to have used the dagger as a catalyst instead of my family's gemstone. I guess I could now say that… I'm not really worthy, to be at someone of the higher Gorichi's presents. After all, I'm only partaking as my family's Servant I could say, with my goal being to only win and achieve victory, to bring glory and fame back to my family, without even giving a care to myself, because I don't deserve such at all.

I wouldn't feel comfortable around someone like that, being only a lamb in the way that is only but a burden. Assassin is more free and energetic about it, acting so friendly with me, besides being summoned into a war without her consent. But she seems happy, I can sense that she is satisfied with everything, especially about me being her Master.

Well I don't want our bond to be seen as only a Master Servant bond. I see us more as… friends.

"Mata-chan, if you are alright with it, I'll clean up the china so that we can go off to your school."

"Wait, let me at the least assist you. It'll be twice as fast, and I don't want you doing all the work after giving me such a nice morning, and the tea of course."

I hope that we can have mornings like these everyday, and I mean exactly everyday.

* * *

Just from a simple thing like cleaning dishes, I know that me and Assassin form a quite good team. At first she insisted on doing everything herself, but I just could not let her do absolutely everything, I had to show her my gratitude anyway, so I proposed to wash the china while she dried them. The work didn't take very long.

I was actually quite surprised by something when entering the kitchen. Boxed lunches, made the exact same way I always prepare them.

"I wouldn't think you were the kind of person to bring two lunch boxes to school. You do look really slim though, is it for someone else?"

Assassin prepared them. Every day I leave a note on the refrigerator of what to prepare in the mornings, both breakfast and lunch. The tea was rather unexpected, but lunch as well, Assassin is just… amazing.

"Yeah, it's for a friend of mine."

Assassin doesn't seem as if she would be familiar with Japanese bento boxes and how to prepare them, but they looked completely perfect, just how I make them. Of course the certain places of where to put what continents were mixed, but that doesn't really matter.

I don't want her to do all of this work of mine, but I am indeed grateful for her, and want to somehow repay her for it.

"We're going to be stopping somewhere while we go. I'll have to hand this in."

Though I was a bit doubtful if the food tasted the same as how they looked, so I had tried out every one of them beforehand, they were.

"Oooh? So someone else is going to be trying my magnificent cooking abilities. It's unfortunate that I won't be able to get their praise directly from them."

"I'll just ask them if they had liked them or not, and then give you their feedback, though I think that you should already know their answer."

"Everyone has a different taste, my dear Mata-chan, something may either taste divine for them, or just plainly horrible."

"How can something that good taste horrible to someone else. I make that every certain day of the week and they are completely in love with them."

"The dish itself isn't the only part of the food that is judged on, but also of the one who had made it. Two tastes come with food – the dish's itself and the cook's skills."

A bit weird for her to speak in such a manner, but she may be right. I don't really care for who prepares something, as long as it tastes good.

"Don't worry, they will like it. Me and Tohsaka-senpai have quite the similar tastes."

"Hmm. I will believe in your words Mata-chan. I have not much reason to doubt you if you say that then."

If Tohsaka-senpai thinks that his lunch doesn't meet her standards, I will only be left shocked. I'd say Assassin's cooking is on par with mine.

"Master, if you only think that I am really good at cooking, I'm actually quite average. I'm just very well in following orders that are given to me. I don't really know that many different types of recipes either, so if you asked me to prepare something without instructions, you would be left quite disappointed."

"But… but you have so much potential with cooking. If you only you tried learning something, you could do it quite well."

"I'm not the kind of woman that is kin on cooking or baking anyway. Preparing meals and dishes is not my hobby, nor am I interested in it. I am a Servant, so I had only prepared those to impress you and as a duty of a Servant."

"Assassin, you're supposed to help me in future fights, not be some kind of maid or housekeeper that prepares me food. I don't deserve such luxury from you."

"If you dislike me doing such deeds, then tell me to stop doing them. I was even planning on continuing making you those lunches every single day. If you had prepared notes for dinner as well, I would prepare them as well."

"I think preparing tea every morning for me will be just enough."

"Right! That is also one of the things that I wanted to ask of you?"

"To prepare tea every morning?"

She nods with an expression of happiness.

"It's a bit of an unusual thing to get so happy about. I'll allow you to do them. I enjoyed spending the time this morning with you Assassin."

"Thank you so ever much Master. If you have any recommendations of what beverages you would like me to prepare, I will do it. No matter if it is tea, coffee or any kind of alcohol."

"Assassin, I'm underage."

"So? Getting a bit of alcohol in your system won't do much damage. Besides, you always act like such an adult, I though drinking was only part of the things you do to act as one."

"Yes, and I drink tea to do that."

"… . God are you a smart little man that looks like a woman."

Her way of describing me is certainly… I'm not even going to comment about it.

I kind of feel a bit of an awkward nerve with her. Surprise I didn't feel like this yesterday when I first met her, or should I say… also this morning.

"You should also know that nothing unusual had happened during my surveillance. It was rather dull being on the rooftop through the whole night time, I had honestly thought that something that would pique my interest happen, but this whole region seems to only be mundane."

"Well that isn't unusual. This is the part of the city where crimes and certain occurrences happen very rarely, though there is something that had happened recently…"

"There is? Well indulge me with the news. I am quite interested in what had happened."

I don't really want to return to that occurrence, but it's still a bit in my head, and it just came out of my mouth. Assassin seems eager to hear the information about it though.

"It was just a murder."

"Describe it more thoroughly if you may."

"The victims were a whole family. I'm not much informed about it myself, but from what I saw it was a truly horrible spectacle, there was blood everywhere, I was shocked. I never expected something horrible like this to happen here of all places."

"Hmmm…"

Yup, she is interested, she is pinching her cheek and thinking it trough, about to ask another question.

"Do you at least know what the murder weapon may be?"

"I heard that it was some kind of knife. They had stab wounds and cuts, even the children of the family… Honestly, how could someone murder children in such a brutal way?"

I can't get that sight out of my head. On the gurney… it was covered up with a black sheet… with a small arm dangling out of it. Blood was dripping off of it. From the size I could only tell that they were about five years of age.

"Mata-chan, if you don't want to talk about this tragedy, then we can stop. I hope that you weren't to close with the victims."

"No, they were just neighbours that I would greet from time to time. And I think we should just leave it at that. Let me put on my shoes."

"Did you take everything you need with you? I wouldn't enjoy you ordering me to go retrieve an item you forgot because of your absent-mind."

"I wouldn't do that, I don't like asking anyone favours, or especially ordering them to. I probably overlooked something, but oh well."

"What if it's something important that you really need?"

"I have everything I need, so don't worry about it."

"Well then, I'll trust you on it."

She melts in the air, leaving no traces of her whatsoever, though I can still feel her presence next to me, even though she's not there.

"How long are you able to stay in that form?"

"For as long as I need to. It's the specialty of the Assassin class after all, other Servants have a hard time sensing our presence, so this is an ideal skill to have."

"Even though I am able to sense you…"

"I am using the magical energy that you are providing me, and you are my Master, so you of course know where I should be, in a short distance of course."

While she explains her unique skill I finish putting on my shoes. There. We're ready to set off. I exit the residence with my invisible Servant by my side.

* * *

"Oh God! It's so bright outside."

"Are you not used to such weather?"

"I would prefer it if the sun wasn't out. I do better during night time when the sun light isn't shining in my face."

"Well welcome to Japan, where the sun practically shines everyday. It's winter so the weather should get a bit colder soon."

"I hope for that to happen."

* * *

"Hmmm. These streets seem rather empty of citizens and vehicles. Is this area that lightly populated?"

"Well it's not like the urban part of town. Most are just inside their homes because it's still morning, so everyone is probably getting ready for their days."

"So you say that there are more people in the city itself than this region? I hope that that is not where we are going…"

"Why wouldn't you want us to be going there? I like spending time in the city when possible."

"I'm not fond of very populated areas. I'm fortunate that my Master is not residing in the centre of the city."

"Really? I thought differently. You seem that the kind of person that would be a bit more of an extrovert."

"That's not the only reason why? Walking through the city where more people could see you talking to yourself would lead to suspicion. What if another Master or Servant saw you?"

"Wouldn't that make no difference from us talking in this region, where there are even less people? It would be much easier to notice than in the city."

Assassin, you are definitely too paranoid. Though I guess it isn't too bad of a thing, you are precocious.

"That is exactly how I should be. You are fortunate that you do not have the Command Crest on the surface of your body where everyone is able to see."

"What is this?! We can communicate telepathically?"

"Only if you are addressing to me. This is quite convenient, now no one will think that you are an insane weirdo who talks to themselves."

Hooray for that…

* * *

"Matasa, do you not ever get tired of walking this much? Wouldn't it be more comfortable and quick to use one of those vehicles?"

"Not really, because I'm pretty used to it. Besides, it's much healthier and nicer to walk than to drive, I enjoy looking and observing everything that happens around here."

I wonder if that answer surrounds me or her, Assassin shouldn't be that tired to walk, this isn't even that much of what I plan to do today.

"Yes, this neighbourhood does look quite nice and lively, even though there's barely any life anywhere here."

"Didn't you say that you don't like being around crowded areas? This is idle for you and me."

Well, this neighbourhood is always pretty quiet, and I enjoy it being like that. It's only the morning, so of course there would be little amount of people here, most are just about getting ready to go out.

"I'm only saying that a some more effective means of transportation would be much more pleasant and swift than walking around, I don't really mind what it may be, as long as we could reach our destinations quicker."

"The only other thing I have is a bicycle at the mansion. I used it quite a while back for better exercise, but ended up accidentally breaking it. Then I just started walking to school and grown to appreciate it more than going with the bicycle. And I didn't really bother with fixing it since then."

"What about the many vehicles that we have seen, you must also have that stored somewhere?"

"A car? Sorry, but I'm too young to drive, and I don't have a licence to drive one nor can I get it. In two more years, then maybe."

Though I doubt that those two more years will end up coming…

"Two years? It's absurd, we don't have two years for waiting. Why not let me use the vehicle instead?"

"Sorry Assassin, but I'm not going to let you be driving a car anywhere. That's even more absurd – a Servant driving a vehicle…? Well, I guess it wouldn't be that bad of an idea, but I can't be risking it, besides, you can't."

"Why not? State your reason."

"Well first you would need to be educated in how to drive a vehicle, which would take quite a while, and we don't have that much time. Second, I would need to make you an identification card so that the driver's licence could be made, and I can't forge an I.D. for you, and lastly, you're a Servant."

"Curses, if only you would've summoned me in the Rider class then I would be able to find a more effective means of transportation than this."

"Well, I'm sorry Assassin, but you'll be doing much more walking than this, this isn't even half of the distance we have to go to get where we are going. And besides, let's enjoy the views and get more time to converse with each other."

"If you insist then Master."

Yes, I prefer this much more than a car or bicycle. It feels much more lively and nice, especially when I have some company, I do adore the times when I am able to walk to school with Tohsaka-senpai, and it feels a bit strange walking with someone who is, well, not exactly in physical form, and someone that I know for only practically less than a day, I do feel as if I've known the woman known as Assassin for quite a while.

Hmm, weird, I've never noticed this particular house while walking through here, it looks fairly empty from the looks of it, behind the windows there aren't even any curtains, Is it abandoned?

No, it looks fairly new and clean, well, not new, but kept in well condition.

Well, I'm not exactly familiar with every single house in this district, so I could only miss it. Maybe the person or people that live here have moved and are just putting it for sale. Well anyway, I should keep…

For a second there, I thought that I forgot the path to Tohsaka-senpai's mansion. Fortunately it's quite big, and I can recognize it from even a distance.

"Assassin, I can see Tosaka-senpai's house from here. We're close, after that we'll go to school and you can rest."

"Humf. I don't need any rest. My stamina is strong and I am able to exceed my limits whenever I want, so do not enhance our pace just because of me Mata-chan, I can walk for hours on end."

"Great then, because I have some very good plans en-stored for the both of us later today."

* * *

I kind of wanted to just run to the house, but instead I just did a faster walk to Tohsaka-senpai's house, and we are now at the premises.

"So Assassin, what do you think of Tohsaka-senpai's mansion? Did you think that I was the only semi-rich person in this whole neighbourhood?"

I'm completely right. Assassin looks speechless from looking at the huge mansion. She seems so focused on it as well. Indeed the Tohsaka mansion has a very foreign style to it that makes it stand out from the other houses around this area besides mine. Assassin looks Caucasian, so she should be more acquainted with this style more than me. Oh that reminds me, I should ask her something important, but first comes the task at hand.

"Let us act quick Assassin. Tell me if you see Tohsaka-senpai through the windows."

I start walking to the front door with a quick pace to not alarm anyone around. This is a sort of stealth mission now.

"Wait, Master!"

I stop in my tracks and proceed to run behind a bush to crouch and take cover.

" Can you see her? Did she see me?"

I feel nervous, if Tohsaka-senpai had somehow spotted me through my awesome stealth, means this so mission has unfortunately come to an end and I'll have to face her in person.

"Matasa, be cautious and stay where you are. I can…"

"Oh no! Assassin, please tell me if she saw me. I don't want to keep standing behind this bush looking even more suspicious, because I won't know how to explain this to her."

The quickest thing I could make up is that I was admiring this foreign greenery she has, but I quite doubt that it would be that believable.

I stay crouched for moment to not be visible through the window, or at least I hope so, I don't think that she would be able to spot me, this bush is quite thick and leafy, so it would be even difficult to spot someone here from even the second story windows.

"It's fine, just a false alarm."

"Is Tohsaka-senpai anywhere near the windows? I can't move an inch if she will be able to spot me."

"I see nor sense anyone near them. I'll keep a watch on them and you go do what you want to do."

Only a couple of metres are left between me and the front door. I swiftly, but quietly, walk towards them before arriving near the entrance. Now all that's left is to leave the package and retreat.

Next to the welcome mat, I set down the lunchbox filled with various types of Tohsaka-senpai's favourite food, wrapped in a red cloth adorned with kittens, and on top of it I clipped a simple note with a simple message.

" _Dear Tohsaka-senpai,_

 _I am very sorry to tell you this, but I won't be able to accompany you to school for a while due to a certain event I am participating in the mornings and afternoons after school activities. God I know this message is very formal and it totally doesn't have to be this way, but I'm sorry for that as well. If possible, we might just end up meeting each other as school and if I am able to find the free time for you, I definitely will. Please enjoy this meal that I have prepared for you. What am I saying, of course you will enjoy it, anyway, see you at school ;3._

 _Love, Mata-chan"_

I wrote my name like that because she obviously likes to call me by that nickname, and now I have another person calling me like that. Well I guess that I'll just have to get used to this kind of thing, it's if they want to call me that.

Honestly, I feel a little bad that I can't even tell Tohsaka-senpai this in person and have to leave her a simple note. But it's only for the best. Most of the time I will be having Assassin by my side, and I can't risk having her find out about her.

I'm happy that she will be enjoying her favourite lunch that I have prepared for her. Sadly though, I think this will be the last time that I will be able to prepare Tohsaka-senpai… any lunch at all. She doesn't ask me if it's something personal, so I'm not worrying at all if she decides to ask me for the reason why, because she won't. She will understand and respect the fact that I don't want to tell her.

Though I do hope no one steals this. Not that many people come to this mansion since of the stone fence and gate, so no one should be willing to come in here just for that. I must make my leave now.

Putting my back to the entrance, I silently run back behind the gates to safety.

"I did it partner, our mission is officially complete. Are you still not able to spot her?"

"Partner? Where did that come from? And no, there is no living being near them, fortunate us right?"

"Perfect. Then let's retreat from the area before we get busted. She still may come around and see us."

This turned out to be much easier than I had expected it to be, I guess I could say that without Assassin's assistance, it would've been much more risky and difficult to accomplish it. By know Tohsaka-senpai should anyway just be in the shower, because we had left early so that casualties would be left at a minimum.

It's a bit of a coward's way to just leave a note then to directly talk to her, but the reason is that it's only part of the plan that I have formulated.

I can't really do anything to change it, or I'm just not able to formulate a more effective one that could be better for me. This was the best one that I could come up with.

It is already decided that I will die, in only a certain amount of days while the Holy Grail War goes on. After that, Tohsaka-senpai will feel miserable over my loss, a lot of people will, and I don't want that to happen, I don't want everyone to be sad because of me, I'd feel guilty, even in death, and now, and in the future while I am still alive.

I don't want to be doing this, but leaving a worse impression, even after such a long time of knowing me, it's the most effective one that could possibly work.

If I do this, mine and Tohsaka-senpai's relationship will… deteriorate. She'll feel less worried about me if I act like this, if only a little. It will be for the best.

I don't want to act like this, because it isn't something that I would actually do, but since this is a war I am currently in, with my fate already decided and the only thing left is my care for the emotions of other's, I have to become a different person, as sort of… untrustworthy person, which may only be seen as bad, though I want to stay on the neutral side as much as possible.

Practically breaking my relationship with my friend, it's only a part of what has been decided for me, if I want to get what I want.

I'm very sorry Tohsaka-senpai. This is selfish, so I don't deserve your forgiveness at all. I just hope that… I can at the least be truthful to that one promise I left.

" _See you at school"_

At least one more time… So that I can just… settle it.

"Assassin, is something wrong?"

I've walked a bit already from the gates, but I can't feel Assassin's presence next to me, she keeps standing, looking at the house.

"It's nothing Master. Heh. Don't worry about it. My imagination might just be getting to me."

* * *

If I am correct, Tohsaka-senpai should already be going out of her house right about now, though I of course may be wrong about that, since it is possible she is still getting ready to.

Well, I don't really have to worry about her running into me, since I am fairly away from her house right now, and I am coming up pretty near the school.

If I am lucky, I might just run into Emiya-senpai at the courtyard, if not, then maybe in the halls somewhere, or in the Student Council room as always, though would it be a bit rude of me to just go into there to talk to him? He should allow it if it's me…

Then again... probably not. I just have to have hope that I meet him near the entrance, if not, then after school maybe….

Meeting him is only part of my plan. If Tohsaka-senpai saw me with Emiya-senpai, then she would think that I was ditching her for him, and she would begin to like me less, seeing me less than a friend…

Even though I don't want that to be the case, it only has to happen. I don't want Tohsaka-senpai to grieve for me after I depart from this life, and also…

I know that it is quite a selfish desire of mine, but… if only I would be able to… talk to Emiya-senpai once more before things actually start happening, and I may…

 **If you got closer to him, wouldn't he feel the same way as your soon to be ex-friend, when he finds out that his "friend" got his bowels torn out by an unknown assailant. You wouldn't want to put him in that kind of position, you're too weak to let that fact of yours be accepted.**

"Hey, if you weren't feeling any well then why are we outside, you should be resting."

"Uhhh… what?"

I hadn't noticed that I had stopped walking, and right as I was crossing the street, luckily there are no cars around at the moment, and Assassin was here to get me out of my random stage. I quickly move forward to the sidewalk in front of me.

"Well, you just stopped walking, and from the look you had I thought that you weren't feeling good at all. And standing in the middle of the road isn't the best place to have something like that happen, luckily there isn't any sign of people around to see you in that condition."

"Would anyone out here even care about that?"

"Someone would care about a person standing in the middle of the road. Anyway, answer my question, are you feeling all right?"

"Yes. I'm fine Assassin, thank you for worrying about me. I'm glad I have you with me."

"Of course, I am always by your side, what kind of Servant would I be if I wasn't?"

I feel a sensation of relief after hearing that. Even though the both of us haven't encountered any opponents yet, I feel as if I can entrust myself to Assassin. I will do the same for her, we're partners after all, and I will protect her.

* * *

"Well, here we are."

"So this is the education facility to where you arrive daily to study and learn different topics. Very fascinating."

"Would you like to see the inside? It should be fine as long as you stay dematerialised."

I wouldn't be able to give her a tour now, but I would consider giving her one after the school day ends. It would be easier when the halls are lesser of people.

"Thank you for the kind offer, but I feel that it would only be unnecessary, so I will refuse for now."

Seeing that she was quite interested in the outdoor design in the building, I thought that she would be interested in the inside as well, but oh well.

"If you ever want me to show you the inside, then feel free to ask, all right?"

Comparing today to yesterday, when I had also come quite earlier, there are more students today. Not as much as when I usually come, but still a quite large amount that is seen in the courtyard.

"Matasa, will you be all right in the building by your own? There is a large amount of people here, any one of them can potentially be our enemy, just waiting for the right moment to attack you while I'm not by your side."

"I won't deny that, but my worries aren't very high. I've been rather careful with my identity as a Master, and for someone to find out would be pretty much impossible by just looking for Command Seals, why would they look just at me anyway?"

"There is always a small chance of anything happening. Masters and Servants may have their ways on how they distinguish other Masters."

"Even if that was the case, the school is filled with students. Attacking in a very populated area wouldn't be wise of a Magus. I have you with me anyway. If worse comes to show, you will come and save me, right?"

"Indeed Mata-chan. Very well then. Where should I stand idle for the remainder of your school day?"

Hmm, I haven't even thought about where Assassin could stay around here. Somewhere where she wouldn't have to worry about having others be near her would be fairly good. I quickly survey the area of the school to find a suitable spot…

A large abandoned tree near the wall. No students ever go next to it, should be a fairly suitable place for her.

"Yes, that seems like the most suitable area for me. Very well, I shall stay there until you require me. Have a pleasant school day, Mata-chan."

No longer can I sense Assassin's presence beside me. I do hope she stays put there and doesn't just wander off. Hopefully she doesn't get bored of being there as well, though I am able to talk with her without needing to be next to each other.

The amount of students that are beginning to come through the school gate is increasing drastically, despite the fact that there is still dozens of minutes before homeroom starts, proves that most students of this school are indeed diligent.

I stand there for a few minutes, waiting to see if the one person who I want to speak to comes through with the other mobs of students. It seems unlikely that they will be coming, but I just hope for the best, so that I could…

 **What an utterly useless attempt. Isn't it that you don't want others to be fond of you, because of the unfortunate fate that awaits you at the end of your goal? Acting out with your egoistic desires? Then again, you might as well if you want at least one to suffer, or… they might just not end up caring about you… at all.**

…I… I don't want to act the same way to Emiya-senpai as I am acting to Tohsaka-senpai. I'm already turning into a completely different individual than I am, and I don't want it to be that way at all, but… If only I could feel something and…

But I don't deserve to be remembered anyway. It's narcissistic of me to even think about it. I deserve no attention, only…

"Hey look! We finally caught up to the Silver Fox of Fuyuki. Heyo Mata-chan!"

"Oh. Good morning Gorichi-chan."

"Good morning."

These weren't the people I had expected to meet, but still…

"Good morning to you three as well. Makidera-senpai, I'm pretty sure that that title has been expired for me."

"No way will such a cool yet gentle title will ever expire. The Silver Fox of Fuyuki! Kind of sounds like some super hero name, but it totally fits you! It's a title that will be remembered even after death!"

"Maki-san, you're being obnoxious and rude. Gorichi-kun politely stated that he wouldn't want to be remembered or spoken to by that name."

"No way will I give that up! Mata-chan's my opponent! I won't stop it unless she defeats me in a race and I can finally be the fastest sprinter here!"

"That will never happen unless you somehow magically increase your speed and agility. There's no wonder on why Gorichi-kun was called the Silver Fox of Fuyuki. Had you also forgotten that he isn't what he seems."

"I don't worry about that! I'm determined that if I train hard enough, I'll be as twice as fast as the Silver Fox of Fuyuki. You hear me Gorichi? I'll own you one day!"

"Seems as if there is no end to her rudeness. I apologise Gorichi-kun. Her brain is too full with junk that it can't hold simple information as your capabilities, or your gender."

"No worries. I'm pretty forgetful myself of certain things as well. I don't feel insulted or anything. And it is as Makidera-senpai says, though I do believe that with a few years of enough training and cardio fitness, you will get to my level of speed, Makidera-senpai."

"Just watch it Gorichi-chan! In the next year or so, I will challenge you to the biggest race Homurahara Academy has ever held! Wait… what is this about her gender?"

"There's nothing about it. Forget what I said. You're not worth the explaining."

"I honestly didn't understand why you decided on leaving the track team Gorichi-chan. You were such a good runner, the best one… the best I've ever seen actually."

"It were my first days of the school year. I only intended to try out on the Track Club."

"But didn't you have fun being with us? Well, with that training you could've become better and harder to beat for me, though you still probably train somewhere other than the club. I though we would finally have an addition to our group."

"I had the best first months with all of you, I indeed did. It's just as I said, it was only a try, and I did have other activities I was signed on and focused more of my time into those. Eventually I grew out of them."

"Despite the fact that even in your first days, you were chosen for the Fuyuki Marathon and had come in first place. You are throwing away a talent that can be improved beyond remark Gorichi. A big number of other members even looked up to you for your outstanding capabilities."

"We're not trying to force you with anything Gorichi-chan. You were such a bright light when you first came, and then you just left us, you stopped attending, eventually resigning yourself from the team."

This was practically a while ago, a few months back if I remember. I haven't gotten much of a chance to speak with the three of them until know. I consider Makidera, Himuro and Saegusa-senpai my friends, after a few months of spending time with them, though I feel as if I can't really expand that anymore, since it's already ruined. It can't go anywhere anymore, after all, my fate is sealed in death.

"Well, after all this time of actually thinking this trough. I have come to the decision. I haven't been active in any other clubs since that time as well, because during all the times when I attended them, they seemed fun, but as the Track team, I only did because I wanted to see how they would feel like."

"It's nice that you were trying out every club the school had to offer, trying to find something that you enjoy doing. Very little would put themselves in that kind of commitment."

"You can practically do anything. Your have an unlimited number of talents Gorichi-kun, and you should use them how you would like them."

"Gorichi-chan, even if you don't come back to us, we can still be friends.."

All of them. I had a different connection with this group of girls than I have with Tohsaka-senpai. In the length of the bond it's still the same, though I felt as a group with them. They've all been so nice to me since I had come to Homurahara.

"Don't worry, I have made it up. In a few weeks sorts, I'm coming back."

All three of them stare at me blankly after my decision, even Himuro-senpai, who is known to be very emotionless. I can sense relief from all of them.

"Thank goodness! Thank you so much Gorichi-chan, I'm so glad about it. We all are!"

"Indeed. Now that you are coming back, we will have less problems with the newcomers. If you do not mind, it would be relevant for you to train them once you finally sign back onto the team."

"Kane-san, Gorichi-chan isn't coming back to act as an instructor."

"I don't mind that Saegusa-senpai. It'll be fun to assist anyone else, I'm all up for it, and I'd be honoured to act as a sort of guide in the team, as long as I get to be the same as them."

"Yes, I have high hopes for this. Our guidance abilities aren't as good in neutral as Gorichi's. Thank you very much, Gorichi-kun."

"Oh you don't have to thank me. I'm very glad that all of you still want me to come back after such a while. I should be thanking you for bringing me back in."

"Why wouldn't we bring you back? You're the second best Ace that we need! Without you, dealing with the new members was difficult, since none really like my type of training. The track team will be back on its feet again!"

"I didn't know that the Track team needed me that much. I'm honestly honoured. I'm… glad that all of you have…"

"Oh crap! We made Mata-chan cry!"

"I apologise. This is just very nice of all of you. I'll be waiting for that time to come in the coming weeks, so please wait for it."

"Of course Gorichi-chan. I've got a very sweet idea, we should all celebrate Gorichi-chan's return with all of us going out somewhere. Gorichi-chan, would you want that?"

"Oh that's not really necessary for me…"

"But this is a very important thing! We have to celebrate it in some way."

"But… would all of you be actually willing to do that?"

"I have nothing against it. With that, we would be able to review on how has your life been going, I'm quite curious."

"As long as I get to race you again! I've gotten a lot better since the last time Gorichi!"

"Yes, I believe in your words Makidera-senpai. Though if all of you don't mind, could we decide on the date of that celebration during a different time, maybe when I finally come back?"

"Of course! It's about you, and we wouldn't want to do it on a day on which you would be busy. Just inform us when you want to decide on it."

"I definitely will. Thank you all very much. I'll see the three of you later then. Have a good day at school!"

I turn my back to them, waving my hand to state my goodbye. It was very nice of them to still have so much hope for me. I guess that… they still are somehow girls that I can consider being, my friends. Unfortunately, I couldn't encounter the one I had waited for, but it doesn't really matter anyway. It's only decided to be irrelevant. As cruel as it sounds, it's only a small part of what has been decided for me.

I won't be able to… talk to Emiya-senpai. It was over before I had even met him yesterday anyway. All those hopes. No, it's been done much earlier. It's for the best if I don't encounter Emiya-senpai… or Tohsaka-senpai to that matter ever again. If I do that, then things for them will only become worse… I have Assassin with me at the least. I hope she is staying at her assigned position, and continues doing it for the remainder of the day.

It's fortunate, that I didn't get to meet Emiya-senpai again. I'll leave those actions that had happened to yesterday's events. I need to keep the contact between them as low as possible.

Then again, I'll have to sign myself up for the Track team again. I would start now and hold that celebration with them today if I could, unfortunately I already have plans, and the days after this will only get harder. I will keep that promise I made to them – joining the Track team and coming back, even if that is unlikely to happen…

I'll… come back to the Track team… to them once again…

 **You lied to them…**

* * *

What a dull day. I hadn't moved an inch from my position. Even my classmates probably started thinking that something was wrong with me. Me spending the whole day inside of the classroom, while I most of the times go out during breaks.

It was necessary. It's only going to be like this from now on anyways. Or at least when I come up with a better plan to avoid Tohsaka-senpai. I might just have an idea of her lunch routines. If she spends her times on the roof during them, then the halls should be pretty safe from the first minutes of the beginning and last minutes of the end of the breaks. But then there is Emiya-senpai. I don't have much of a clue on how he spends his breaks. Obviously having lunch, but where?

I could perhaps find that out if I try to look out for him. Would stalking him during breaks actually be that really great of an idea…? No, it's just ridiculous. He just, shouldn't be my problem… why should I be worried about it.

I'm afraid. If I see him again, I'll want to talk to him. Staying clear of the halls will just have to be the correct choice. At the least I can chat with Assassin, kind of unusual for the time, but I'll get used to it. At the least I didn't die of boredom during breaks. Assassin has… a pretty unique sense of humour, a kind I wouldn't expect for a person like her to have, most of the times she would just ask me about the students and the teachers, and would end up making fun of them. It's a really mean thing of her to do, but I have to admit, it was rather hilarious. There were cases when I almost started giggling during a lesson.

"Well all right. Sorry for disturbing you… see you tomorrow."

Seems that I have come out during an unpleasant time. I can only recognize that voice being Makidera-senpai's. I would prefer not talking with them at the moment. I would be up for a bit of chitchat, but only once, for my sake, when I sign up to the Track team, perhaps tomorrow or sometime next week, but I shouldn't take too long.

I take a look forward to see if there is any possible way to avoid meeting them again, unfortunately, I see something else, something that would be even more of a… problem… . Emiya-senpai.

From the looks of it, Makidera-senpai, with Saegusa and Himuro-senpai, where talking to him, and seem to now be parting. Perfect.

There doesn't seem to be anyway to pass him without being spotted, going through the back would only make me look suspicious and would make it awkward if he caught up to me. Though actually, why would he talk to me anyway? Maybe if I just pass through him without saying anything, I might make it.

I continue walking forward, trying to look semi to the ground so that we wouldn't have eye-contact. He still seems to be looking in the direction of the trio exiting the school, not staring at me coming past him.

I begin to become nervous as I get closer to him. Talking to Emiya-senpai, I just can't do it. I increase my speed a bit, not too much so that I wouldn't look more suspicious.

"Oh, hi Gorichi-kun!"

Curses. He saw me! No, I'll just say hi to him and pass through. Maybe he just wanted to say hello to me. Hopefully.

"Good afternoon Senpai."

It was a bit awkward of making a greeting and a parting at the same time, but it's the best, seems that it was…

"Hey, can I ask you something?"

I'll say no to it, after all, being rude is only the part of what I have to do…

"Yes…?"

Dang it. I couldn't go through with it. I should've said that I was in a hurry instead, since I kind of am. Whatever, too late for it now I guess.

"You're acquaintances with Tohsaka, right?"

"Yes… What is it about Senpai?"

"I just heard that she hadn't come to school today, and since I've seen you coming with her to school most of the times, I thought you would know why she was absent."

Tohsaka-senpai hadn't come to school today? It's unusual, she most of the time never skips coming to school.

"Are you for certain that Tohsaka-senpai was absent today?"

"Seems that no one has seen her today, so it pretty much proves it. So I'm gueesing you don't know about it huh? I hear from the trio that she got sick and decided to take a day off."

This is a bit unnerving. If something had happened to Tohsaka-senpai, I should find out about it. I have to find out if she is all right. I'll check a bit in the evening.

"This is the first I heard of it, I'll have to go check up on her. If you don't mind, Senpai."

"So that's how it is… Well, it's not that big of a deal if she only hadn't come for today. I'm sure it isn't very serious. She is a frighteningly strong person after all."

"…Indeed. I don't really know of anyone that might be stronger than her… I'll see you tomorrow then. Goodnight, Emiya-senpai."

"Gorichi-kun."

I stop in my tracks once more.

"Is there something else you wanted to know, Senpai?"

I wonder what else he wants to ask me. I don't want to be standing here for any longer… next to him.

"We couldn't have really talked much yesterday. Everything went by way to quickly, especially when I was fixing up the radiators in the classroom. By the way, were they working?"

"Yes. My class didn't seem to bother with it much, but I could feel it. Thank you, again, for doing it. I told my homeroom teacher what you had done. She's grateful that you took it upon yourself to do it."

"Well that kind of is my duty in the school. I'm glad I decided on doing it, especially that it made a difference."

"I sit right next to them, so I was on the warmer side of the class."

"I hope I didn't make you sit next to a high heating source and left you bearing with it in sweat, haha…!"

"Don't worry. I'm pretty neutral with temperatures. My body is used to both cold and heat, though I did feel a bit warmer while sitting."

"Good. That's kind of the problem - we barely get to talk like this. I wanted to know how you been doing."

"I'm the same as how I feel everyday. My mood uncommonly changes, but I do feel fine most of the time. Thank you for asking."

"No worries. But… I'm glad that you feel positive from what I look at. You're one of the most optimistic people I know, and it's rare to find someone like you."

"I try to make everyone feel comfortable around me. I like everyone I meet, so I don't have a reason to look irritated. Like I am now - talking to you."

"I'm glad… Matasa…"

Again, he called me by my first name. That startled me a bit, but with a good feeling.

"You're saying that you have been doing all right, and I trust you with that. But… you should know, if there is anything that is bothering you, then you can obviously tell me about it. I'll only…"

"Emiya-senpai… . You shouldn't… worry about me that much. Besides, if I had any problems, I would know how to deal with them. I don't want anyone else trying to help me with the things that I can take care of by myself. I've gained experience every day, and eventually had learned on how to live. You were worried about me, correct?"

From the corner of my eye, I spot that he nods.

"I've had many issues, and learned to deal with them. Well, to be fair, I am still dealing with them. Every day they try to pin me down and don't let my stand up, but I know how to get back on my feet again. Obviously there will be more, but I'll only be more experienced from the ones that I am facing now. After all, a student's life is only made up of problems that they must conquer, correct?"

"So… you are doing all right. I'm glad you're being friendly, even after…"

"I've learned something through the years. You should be living in the future. Making a fresh start would only lead to many new possibilities, Emiya-senpai. The future can hold… a lot of mysteries… that can have an unsuspected outcome."

"That says a lot, but would making a fresh start be worth it, and leaving everything behind."

"You make a fresh new start everyday. The actions of yesterday, or before that don't really matter in today's world. It's unsuspecting, anything could happen. The only thing that seems to stay in the future, is the problems that still follow you from the days before, unless you just learn to deal with them. Then, the brighter your future will become, if not… it will only get darker from there."

I've said more than I had to, but I know that from what I said, Emiya-senpai should understand. I'll wrap it up.

"Everything after that day, it hadn't changed. I'd say it was only… for the better. I learned that I only became better for myself. I've learned from that day. And I believe that, it will be… better if I continue to aim for it."

"Were you really… all right with that? I don't understand."

"Emiya-senpai. Nothing was wrong. I told you, that it only became better from there on out, because I became a better being. Making a fresh new start would only be for the best."

"Would you actually… let me, after what I had did?"

"I have no control over your actions, nor had I. You are free to do whatever you want, Emiya-senpai, it is your life after all, and I have no right to. Have a pleasant evening."

It's for the best anyway. To encourage him in starting a new day, tomorrow. Everyday must be a new day, so why would he even care anymore. It's been long, and I must just leave him.

"A new start you say… I can go with that. It's better having a fresh start anyway. Then, can I ask you something, Gorichi-kun? Do you want to walk together?"

I've wanted that… from the start of yesterday, when we had met. I can't do it, even though it's the one thing the I would ant to before… . Would just one…

 **Making it worse for him. I thought you wouldn't want that. With this, he would get some attachment to you, and when you finally end…**

"I'm sorry, Emiya-senpai, but not today. Have a pleasant remainder of your evening."

"Oh, well then, all right… . Same for you."

I start resuming walking, my shadow growing behind him as I walk forward out of the school courtyard.

"Emiya-senpai…

I don't deserve it anyway. It will end… badly. Please don't keep those memories anymore. By what I meant to start anew, I meant it… completely anew, without the memories, holding you back. It's best to seize the time we had completely, since it will only be irrelevant."

A tear runs down my cheek. I try to look to the front so that he doesn't see it. It's a tear of sadness, but I'm happy. That way… I have less worries. I brush the small droplet off with the scuff of my jacket.

It was the best decision to make. Avoiding those memories to linger. In my mind, I will always remember them. I said those words to Senpai, because I wanted to encourage him on forgetting the past that we had. I'm glad he was worried though, selfishly. It's for the best that he doesn't give a care about it anymore, same with Tohsaka-senpai.

These two seniors of mine. I've known them for such a long time, and eventually we had became something that would be considered as friends, more than that actually. But now, because of my selfishness, I have to seize these bonds that we made. They were deteriorating anyway, with Emiya-senpai's… . He's been a bit awkward around me, and I had noticed this from yesterday as well. He was still living with the unnecessary guilt that he made up, which he didn't even deserve to have. He can't live in that anymore, so forgetting about me… would be for the best.

I want the both of them, and the bonds, to be broken, meaning as less contact with each other as possible. I'll…

 **Be dead. It was for the best. It would be the best, if they actually just disliked you, because then there would be no worries. You'll die, and the only bond that you will end up having is one with Death. Your wish of your end is only making it stronger than with the both of them. Keep this up, and they won't feel as much grief. Become fortunate for the wish you want, and they may end up not even giving a care for it. Embrace the end of yours that will only await at the end of your goal.**

Will Death be my only true friend… who knows my wish?

Assassin, she's my other friend, but I can't tell her, or she will become worried. I haven't even asked her about her identity yet. I should already do that, if it doesn't come with a cost. I wouldn't want to lie to her.

 **No sin will be forged from now one anyway. Not even a lie. You've paid it with your end.**

I can say that today was rather difficult. I've done some decisions that were rather hard, but I know that they were for the best. I've made them already, and that was only the easiest part, choosing and doing them…

Guess this is only a small part of what I have gotten myself into. It was I'd say, half my obligation and half of my choice, since I am practically obligated to do them, and no going back now it seems, as if I wanted to do it anyway. At the least, I won't be alone most of my time now.

"You really took a while talking to that boy back in the school courtyard. Was he a friend of yours?"

"Yes, he was my friend. I only had something important to say to him, so I apologise for making you wait."

"If it was something important, then who am I to stop you from doing it?"

"Still, I took way more time than I had to."

"Doesn't really matter anymore, since we're already where you wanted to take me… I honestly thought that you would just take me around the city to let me get knowledge of the "battlefield", and not at a very risky area like this."

"You know that it would take too long to show you the whole city by just walking. We can get a pretty good view from here as well. Just thought that this would be the best place where you could check out the city for yourself."

Yes, and it being one of the largest buildings in Fuyuki. I'm not very familiar with the skyscraper on which me and Assassin are now, all I know is that it's a business office building that is under construction, though it has been paused for a month know because of a budget problem for it, and the construction will resume in only a couple of months when the budget problem is under control, which the owners presume to be in half a year I'm guessing. It's pretty abandoned now. It's closed off on the second floor with tape stating "Under Construction". I'm kind off breaking the law by entering a restricted building, but it should be fine if I don't get caught, it's way too high up to see from the streets and no one ever comes here, so we should be safe.

"I'll agree with you. You can surveillance a big plot of the city from here, even the forest is visible, though I couldn't say that I have very good sight to spot anything."

"I didn't intend for this to be a lookout spot, but it wouldn't be a bad idea to make it one. To be fair, this is the first time I've actually came here."

"And you didn't think about investigating it beforehand? You are indeed careless Mata-chan."

"Who would go into a semi-abandoned building anyway? We're staying on the rooftop anyway where the door is intended to be locked."

"Stealing the keys from the reception area of a restricted building seems like a felony to me though…"

"I'll only be borrowing them for the time being while we are here, very careless of the owners to just leave them there."

"Perhaps they are intended to be a spare."

"And being left where anyone can take them? I don't think that is the case."

A whole ring of keys just being left under the reception desk in the entrance, very careless, though it is a bit difficult to get into the building itself. All the entrance doors where locked, except one open window in the back alley. It was a fair jump that wouldn't be enough even for very tall people, so Assassin gave me a lift and she herself just went through the wall. I wonder how that feels.

"I didn't expect my master to have this sort of rebellious side. I'm glad that there isn't just a goody two shoes in that personality of yours."

"If my actions don't hurt anybody, then I will only do what doesn't affect others in a bad way."

"Despite abandoning your friends?"

"…I'm not abandoning them. I'm only doing what will be right for them"

"And how will that exactly be better for them? You've done a lot of measures to ensure that to happen, actually, you could say that in all, you're the one that is trying to make them abandon you, but you are the one that is actually leaving them behind."

…I… I didn't really take it in that way, but it is true. Even if it's for the better good, I'm abandoning them, even though it's the last thing of what I want to happen. If possible, I'll only true to ensure their safety, but in the end, I'll only leave them without me.

No, the thing is that… I may just not deserve to be with them. They're better people than me anyway, they…

 **Thinking that you are utterly useless will only bring irrelevance during the remaining time in which you are still alive.**

I care about Tohsaka and Emiya-senpai. I'm not worth the kindness that they give me. I don't want to be a burden to everyone, with my death being the case here. I'm… abandoning them… just for the greater good.

"Your rethinking the decisions you have made, aren't you?"

"There's no point in rethinking them if I've already done them, and I don't want to anyway, it's only for the better good."

"Hmmm, and are you doing it in your or their favour?"

"Of courses it's for their sake. Assassin, we're risking our lives in this war. It's better if I do something good for them than for myself. We might end up dead anyway."

"Yes, anything may happen throughout the days of the Holy Grail War. It's either win or lose, and losing means death, like in any battle royal. The results are unimaginable, even if you are experienced and have knowledge of what you are doing, but anything can be the case."

As a regular Master, I will only try to avoid making that happen, for both mine and Assassins sake. Even though I… couldn't actually… kill somebody. I'm not mostly worrying about that, though I should, anything like that could end up happening. Even though Assassin is the one who is going to be doing most of the fighting, I don't know if I could… actually do it, and end up taking someone else's life.

"I'm not going to be interfering into your relations with those friends of yours, but aren't you considering the outcome way too soon? It's just seems to me that you are doubting your capabilities as a Master, or even mine as a Servant."

"I'm not doubting neither myself nor you Assassin. It may as well be beneficial, so that it there would be a lower risk of either of them, or anyone in that matter, to find out about your existence."

"Well I am flattered that you are putting me before your real friends, but still… I am capable of hiding my presence and existence from anyone, it's more effective since I am the Servant of the Assassin class, so you shouldn't take such precautions of hiding me away. You may as well just leave me somewhere where they wouldn't be able to find out about me, if it would only make it better."

It's only part of the reason, yes, it would be better and safer if I kept Assassin's presence in all reality secluded.

"But even if something like them finding out about me happen, what would you do? If the existence of Servants got out to non-magi individuals, the action of executing them would be the answer to that."

"Assassin… you can't do that! Would you really have to expose of them?"

"Unless you have some other method. Perhaps you know on how to erase someone's memory or wind back the past so that them finding out about the existence of Servants would be avoided, I have no other option but to do that…"

The existence of magic in all should be secluded from the minor society of people which have no knowledge of it. It would pose a huge problem then. But is killing off the ones who find out about it is really the answer for it? It's way to drastic to do! And Assassin killing of someone who I know…

"…Of course, I would only result to that if you gave me the authority to do so. I can't go by my own actions, even if they are obligatory to seclude our existence, I must first have my Master's permission to do so."

"You could've just said that in all! I was actually getting a bit nerved from that."

I should get used to that trait of hers, that she is always trying to make a frightening joke when I am at my vulnerability.

Her laugh rings in my ears, though I am at a bit of a relief. Even though it's a mean way to express something, she did state the truth.

"Mata-chan, I can't act on my own, I have to follow my Master's given orders. I believe that I had stated this before."

"I don't know. I'm sorry, but my memory isn't that great."

"But if your friends do intend to harm you in some way, I will not hesitate to murder them, providing them a slow agonizing death so that they may learn their lesson before accessing the afterlife."

I sense malicious intent from those words. I should take her serious on that. It only proves how brutal Assassin can be, even as a Servant.

" You would do what?! Assassin, I will not let you just so easily kill my friends!"

"Very well Mata-chan, I will only do as you command me."

I hope on that. I'll take her obedience for granted then.

"Anyway, I know that that's not the whole catch on why you are avoiding confrontations with that Tohsaka and Emiya you speak off. You fear it for something else, I already understand that, even if I have no clue of the reason. Your relationship with those two doesn't seem to be bad, well, I couldn't say for the Tohsaka girl since I haven't seen you interacting with her, but with the Emiya boy, you did seem fairly friendly with each other, at least from his side."

"You were spying at the both of us?"

"I didn't really have anything better to do, and nothing was stopping me from doing so. I should know about what my Master is doing."

I should say it's my fault for leaving her where she can see everything just perfectly…

"Even the fact that he was the one that talked with you proves that he only wanted to. From the first time seeing him as well, he seemed like a… gentleman actually. He was rather polite, I honestly don't know why you would want to end your relationship with someone like that. He is a rare fish in the sea to find. Maybe he's just affected by your "charming demeanour"?"

"That's not it at all. Emiya-senpai knows who I am, obviously. Besides, I've known him way before that, even then we seemed to only have a normal kind of relationship. Why are we even talking about this…? Assassin, please stop giving me that face."

"I apologise Master, but I'm picturing it. Looks like a fairly, actually, it's the idle couple. I must protect and ensure this. Mata-chan, I forbid you from ending your relationship with Emiya Shirou."

"That would never happen, and you know that it wouldn't."

"Not if I ensure it. Mwuhahahaha!"

I couldn't even try to see Emiya-senpai in that sort of way. I can only see him as a friend in my eyes, though I can't stop Assassin to have her fantasies.

"That only leads to it, yes, I will even ensure it more that we don't fall. But it won't be just the main reason for it. Mata-chan, you should know that it is my obligation to ensure your protection from our enemies. You think that the Grail might just affect your relationship with others, and you shouldn't let that, because I will do anything in my power to not let the both of us fall. If it isn't that reason and I may just be wrong, which is a possibility, then so proceed with it, if you do think that it is for the best, to leave out such people from your life. You should ensure your own wishes of having them be part of your life, and not leave them out for their well-being."

"Assassin…"

"Your low mood will affect our efforts badly if you proceed with that – that's what probably any other basic Servant would say to their Master, that a Master's low mood will affect them negatively in battles, and yes that is true, but I'm only looking out for my Master's well being not because they are my Master, but because I can consider them - a friend."

She's doing quite a lot in making me rethink about what I have decided. But what is the point of it if I have already done what I have? I can't change that.

"…!"

I feel Assassin putting her hand on my shoulder.

"You don't get many friends in your life, Mata-chan, especially such good ones that you have right now. You must cherish what you have at this moment, and not let something else ruin it for you. Be stronger, with your own strength and my assistance, we must continue to the goal of overcoming it, winning it! Being this strong and positive will only increase our motive and chances of survival."

"Assassin…"

Instead of a typical smug look, she gives me a smile, a genuine one, trying to reassure me. I feel… I don't know what I feel, but it's positive…

"Assassin… thank you. Even though I've only known you for about a day, I feel as if I've known you for as long as I can remember."

"I'm glad to hear that. Heh, of course none of those two can overcome me as being a better friend to you."

"Yeah. Even though I've gotten quite into it, I'll… I'll leave it as it is, and see on how it results at the end. I'll let them talk to me instead."

"Well you could just talk to them yourself, but I don't doubt that they will make the first move instead. How many times have you thanked me already, you're quite too generous with those words Mata-chan."

"I only want to express my gratitude for you. I wish I could do something more…"

"There's no need for that. You've already provided me with more than I can take in, believe me. It's that I have someone like you as a Master."

"… ."

I want to thank her for that as well, but I'll just hold it out for today. I couldn't have met a better Servant than her, I've been… truly blessed by the Holy Grail with Assassin. I have hope for…

 **Nothing changes it. It's not like you are going to be alive at the end anyway. Sure, make those close ones of yours miserable if you want, nothing will change the results being your death.**

…

It won't change the outcome. But even if that is the case, I shouldn't let things end just because of that with everyone. I'll let fate decide my relationships with them, but for now, I'm glad to have Assassin…

She let go off me a minute ago. I look at the front where she was sitting out on the edge of the rooftop, rather risky, but she isn't there anymore. I take a look around myself, but she is nowhere to be seen.

"Assassin, where are you?"

No response, where the heck did she go. She couldn't have gotten too far out, well, actually, she probably could've, but I didn't allow her, gosh, why am I acting so strict with her now, she's her own person.

Even though it seems unnecessary, I take a look out the edge into the long drop to the streets. It's quite high up, though it looks beautiful from here.

"Oh, my apologies. I was rather breath taken by the vista from here."

I feel a sense of shock as I see where she is. This building is under construction, which has been paused, though the machinery that has been used to assist has just been left out without being taken care off, like the one single crane that assists with moving structural materials.

Out off all the places she decided to be, she thought the best one would be the metal beam being held into the air by the crane, hovering hundreds of metres above road level. It seems to be firmly sealed with the chains, being able to hold out the perfect balance of the steel beam, with Assassin standing on top of it…

"I don't think that what you are doing is a good idea. What if you fall?"

No response from her. The steel beam is pretty away from the wall of the building, also the winds are masking my words.

"Assassin! You should get back here before you fall!"

"Don't worry. There is no chance that I will fall from this, even if I did the fall wouldn't hurt me in any way."

Doesn't seem as if she has any intentions of coming back. Just leaving me up here alone, did she get tired of consoling me? I wouldn't really blame her…

What am I even thinking? It's absurd, ridiculous…

"Assassin, I'm coming, so I'd advice that you hold on to it!"

"Wait, Master! What the hell are you thinking?! Fine, I'm coming back…"

I go back a few metres from the edge. If I get a heads start while running, I'll get to the beam. I'll try grabbing onto the chain holding it and then sit down on it. The chain holding it looked rather sturdy and large, so it should hold more weight.

Normally, anyone doing this would be rather nervous, falling from such a height would obviously lead to death, most wouldn't even think of doing it. I've never tried doing this before myself. I have done a rather large amount of long distance jumps, but not one from a rooftop onto a hanging steal beam.

But as Assassin had said – I could die anytime during the Holy Grail War, and I have her protecting me, so she'll save me if anything happens.

My feet start sprinting to the front, I gain more speed with every step I take. It only takes me a second before I arrive at the edge and jump.

My adrenaline is only pumping, but my conscious itself isn't nervous nor scared at all. I spot Assassin looking at me. Her face is priceless, though I see that she is truly surprised and frightened of what I have done. Well, I'll only impress her with my action. I'd do a flip in the air, but I won't risk that much, I don't have much time to do it either, as it take me milliseconds to get near the beam. I try grabbing at the chain…

But I miss

"Master!"

Time freezes for me there. I hear my Servant screaming for me. She is holding onto the ledge of the chain, but starts sprinting on it to me. The beam is indeed long as well, and she won't catch my arm by just running to me. She could probably just teleport to me and catch me, but would she actually succeed is the question. I knew before even jumping that if I failed, I would die. I'd fall for some moments from the tall building, and eventually come upon the ground. My whole body splattering from the momentum and force onto the ground, maybe even on a car. I wouldn't want to ruin somebody's vehicle because of my clumsy mistake, maybe I'll be fortunate enough to land somewhere not close to anyone. I wouldn't want my blood and meat to stain anyone as I slam myself onto the concrete ground, nor my bones flying into someone and impaling them, with my death even resulting in another. That would just seem silly… At the least, I have the spectacle of the ground road under my feet, at least I can gaze upon it as I close to my imminent death.

 **After that happens, most will only rule it as a suicide. The reason for that will only be obvious. You'll get your wish, because it had happened of a slight mistake you made. Finally, you have taken it upon yourself, even though it wasn't planned to happen, take your own life by such a failure. Would it be the best choice to go by your own hand, to avoid the confrontation with you enemies, eventually them being the ones on ending your life? You have taken it upon yourself, out of your opinion, just ceasing your existence that doesn't even belong to you anymore. This will be both a reward and a punishment.**

"Master!"

Ow. Fortunately my instincts and reflexes are good. I wasn't able to grab onto the chain, so in the last second I grabbed onto the beam itself with my left hand. The steel beam spins clockwise as I hold onto it.

"Hold right there! I'll get you up."

I didn't intend to put such stress on Assassin. I feel like an idiot now. It was way too risky of a thing to do, and I should've just waited back on the rooftop. Then again, I feel quite satisfied with the stunt itself. Now I'm but a hanging man in the sky above life, with a beautiful spectacle spotted beneath my feet. It's such an… exhilarating experience, though my wrist are getting a bit sore from holding in all my weight.

The whole steel beam is spinning, and I'm having an indeed difficult time of getting my bearings. I put all of my strength into my left arm to try and pull me up. I'm even starting to slip, since my hand is sweating and the metal is quite slippery, though I manage to reach high enough to grab the beam with my other hand.

There's not much space because the beam is long and narrow, so getting up will be more difficult than expected, but I can manage it. I pull myself up more, now being easier because I have both of my hands on the surface of the beam, and try to move my right leg over the beam to get onto it. First time fails, though the second one seems to succeed.

Finally, I seem to be out of harms way, at least a bigger one's for sure, though I am a bit nervous to try and stand on my feet, since there's not much wide space, so I have my arms wrapped around the metal bar.

"Here, get up. Grab onto the chain so you don't fall.

I look upward to see Assassin giving out her hand to assist me. I gladly take it for support and am able to get on my two feet. Slowly I put my balance into action and move back and grab the chain supporting the beam into the air. I take a deep breath for my accomplished deed.

"Haha…heh…heh…"

"Are you satisfied now, making me so worried? Was that your goal all along?"

Seems that my Servant has no problem of holding her balance, I'm envious of her skills. Even with the beam still moving left and right, Assassin keeps on standing like nothing on the narrow ground.

"I didn't intend to do that. You could've saved me if I had fallen anyway."

"The chance of that happening is slim because off the distance of the possible fall. You shouldn't only relay on a Servant's abilities in saving their Master. There will be cases when a more major thing would be more difficult, or even impossible to do."

"Well, even if that did happen and I fell, you said so yourself: We can die anytime during the Holy Grail War – so I only took that fact in."

"And that's why you jumped? That's an utterly stupid reason to do something like that."

"The stunt itself was rather risky and idiotic indeed. I only took that fact in, thinking that at any possible moment, I may just die. Death can be anywhere, waiting for the chance to strike us when we least expect it to. We can't avoid it from happening, it's imminent, I can't force it to do it."

"That's only a risk you would take. Forcing Death is only suicide, and what you did would kind of relate to it, if you had failed and fallen."

"But it didn't happen. I got into the part of survival in the chance instead of dying. Basically, I'm saying it can and will come for us, and we shouldn't fear it, for our well-being, remember?"

"I don't. I have no reason to. I'm already a Spirit who has experienced Death, so I know what it is. But you still have your life, so you don't really know about it. Seems that I'll have to be more quick about ensuring on keeping it in good condition."

Even though I haven't experienced it by myself, I think I have more interest, and maybe even knowledge of it than Assassin has.

"You have to admit that what I did was a pretty awesome though."

"Oh definitely. I never thought of you to be such a daredevil. Things like this can make a relationship interesting you know?"

"I've never done something like that in my life. Long distance jumps from point were common things, but from a building onto an unstable platform – definitely not."

"Oh I believe in that. I can only spot muscle in those thick thighs of yours. You could probably do a really effective leg choke with them. Hah! I would've liked to see you grab onto the beam with your legs instead of your hands."

"That's an impossible thing to do!"

"No Master, I am not satisfied with the stunt you have performed in front of me. Please restart and this time, grab hold of the beam with your legs."

I chuckle a bit from that. If she was Tohsaka-senpai, she would be screaming her lungs out on me for doing such a stupid thing, while Assassin just cracks a joke after it and leaves it with a comment.

"I actually wonder if you would be able to do that."

"Master, I am only one of the rarest Servants that you could possibly find. My Agility rank exceeds in large numbers. Obviously I would be able to do such a simple stunt, and more."

"Oh I would definitely like to see that."

"Do you have doubts about me Mata-chan?"

"Of course I don't. You're an Assassin after all, you should be able to do that. And if you say so, then I will only believe in it."

"One of these days I promise to you, that you will be able to see my magnificent Agility skills and tricks. You will truly be amazed by them."

I am already astonished by her. She's a Servant, a being that could practically do anything which would only seem to be impossible to do. In both personality and skills, Assassin is indeed one of a kind.

"The view is much better from here than from the roof. You can look all around, well except the building behind us."

"You're right. You probably found the best possible spot in the whole city."

"The sea, the mountains, maybe even your house if my eyes are correct. You can spot anything and everything from here."

Guess the risky jump was worth it. The building itself is so tall, you have the image of the city, into the sea right in front of you. If you could only fly, you could reach your destination from here within seconds by just flying straight. The beam has fortunately ceased moving, so I decide to sit down to rest my legs. Assassin keeps staring into the view of the city down.

"This spectacle is indeed breathtaking. Even while being alive, I've never seen something that could be as beautiful and cool as this. Matasa, we should make this our special spot."

One of many. Eventually the construction of the building will resume, and the steel beam on which we are at this moment will become part of the building. We'll still have the rooftop, but it won't be the same. But for now, we can at least have this for ourselves during the remainder of the War.

"It's still more dangerous to be on here than the roof though. Without carful movement we could just fall, worst case scenario, the chains holding it break and we fall."

"Heh! I believe the supports are strong enough to withhold two people on it. And don't worry, I myself have exceptional balancing skills, and if you fell, I wouldn't let you hit the ground."

"I'll try to avoid of giving you the job of saving me because of my clumsiness. I should warn you, I rather am like that."

"Yeah, I could tell that…"

This is a rather calm moment. It's windy, but the whole bar is heavy enough and has resistance to the air, so it isn't moving that much. The red sky looks as beautiful as the city beneath us. It's going to become night time soon, but I want to be here until that does come.

And I presume it's a better time than any to ask her.

"Assassin. I feel as if we've become best friends, throughout just one day. It seems impossible, but the both of us managed to do so."

"Indeed. I am very grateful for the moments I have spent with you, and there will still be more to come. I've been blessed, to have been summoned by you and not some other Magus."

"The same is for me, but even so, I don't even know who you are. I should've asked right when I had met you."

Even though we've talked so much with each other, and had exchanged so much about ourselves to one another, I haven't even found about who Assassin was as a living human, if she was one.

"Matasa… I've known you for a day, and got to know so much. I'm truly happy to know what kind of person… boy you are. And I've only been trying to impress you with words that describe me as only the best, which is still of course true, no other Servant can be more awesome than yours truly here."

No other to me at least.

"I've been summoned into the War as your Assassin class Servant, that being my name. From here on now, you've only known me as the person named Assassin, and I presume that that is the case – I am your friend, Assassin."

"Yes, you are. And that's because I've known you being that from just yesterday. There where many Holy Grail Wars before this and other Assassins had existed."

"I believe that. But they were all different from me. I'm my own person, and your Serv… friend. And there are other traits I differ from them, and the only thing that resembles us are our titles. I'm the Assassin of the Fifth Holy Grail. That is who I am at this moment."

"Assassin, what are you trying to say?"

"Matasa, I've started a new life just yesterday as Assassin. I'm more satisfied with it than I ever was before. I want it to stay like that from now on."

"Are you telling me… that you want to leave your old self in the past?"

She nods to my question with a smile. Assassin is genuinely happy. Is it the case that… who she was while she was alive is something that she would want to forget?

"I have started a new existence. Even if it either turns out if we win, or we die, at the end, I want to be Assassin. If possible, I want to leave the things that I had done behind me, in the past, and eventually forget them."

"Assassin, but you can't change that. You can change yourself but… was your past that regretful? I'm not going to ask in detail, just a simple answer is enough."

"I wouldn't want to leave it if that wasn't the case. Starting anew would be the best for a person like me. I'm a Servant now, and will be one from now on. It's already the fact that I am a different person than when I was still alive."

"But you are still the Heroic Spirit of who you were before, there's no changing that right now…"

I know that the person who I have known as this woman is Assassin, my good friend, but there is more to it. Assassin was somebody in life or fiction, she could be anything. She can't hide away that, even if she is a Servant.

" Mata-chan, was the goal of you asking that to find out about my identity?"

"I have to find out about it eventually, don't I? A Master should know about their Servant's identity."

"I've formed a strong bond with you, I can reveal and express myself with you, with such a caring Master such as yourself, you're in fact a perfect friend. Even if I do want to forget the person who I was, my origin, I will only tell you of that if you want. I'm grateful for that. Just please, I don't want you to see as the one of who I was, but the person that is Assassin – your Servant and dear friend."

This whole conversation of the topic, Assassin has just been expressing her happiness of being a new individual. I truly do want to know who she was, it's obligatory of a Master to know of their Servants identity, it would help them in the duration of the Holy Grail War, forming plans and alike…

"I won't lie to you. I'm interested in knowing who that person was… but I doubt they don't compare to the awesome Servant who is Assassin. I don't need to know about that person."

I didn't want to ruin this for her. I won't push her. If Assassin doesn't want to reveal her identity and go back to the time of who she was, then I won't ask her.

"Thank you Mata-chan. Even if it is for a longer time, I want the both of us to make a bond that nothing could break."

"I already predict that being the case. I'm letting you off the hook this time. There will always be the possibility of you using your Noble Phantasm during battle."

If a time comes when Assassin has to use her Noble Phantasm, then I will most likely found out who she is that way. It can't be avoided during a drastic fight when there is no other option.

"You shouldn't worry Mata-chan. By then I presume that you won't care about the person who I was anyway, and I won't let my awful past intervene in me using my Noble Phantasm. It's for this moment that I truly care about that, and maybe tomorrow if we don't have to."

"Assassin, I also have something else to say to you."

"Hmmm, and what would that be exactly?"

"You shouldn't assume that being a Servant is always better than the person in your past. You're the main subject of a War. It may just be harder than even that, most likely that it will be."

"Hmpf. Don't presume as if I hadn't known that. I am a Servant after all. The moment you summoned me, I knew that I had become part of something grave."

She of course had known that. I just reminded, hoping for her to have a bigger picture of it than how she sees it. It's practically the same for me as well…

"I wouldn't have been an Assassin otherwise. I know how to take the life of another, quickly if they don't resist. I could do it quickly even if they were trying to fight me of course, but it would save me strength not having to fight them if they did nothing. Though being of my class, it would be best for me to go with assassinating other Masters, ambushing a Servant obviously would be more difficult, but it would be more fun to fight them than simply ending them right off the bat."

"What if a Master noticed your presence and started fighting back then?"

"Most would obviously think that they wouldn't be a match to fight a Servant, so they would just use theirs, even if they did try to fight back, how long would they be able to hold off against me?"

"It depends on how experienced they are, though I presume not long…"

"Exactly. Being a Servant I get the upper-hand, and being an Assassin, executing them would only take a matter of seconds, and if their Servant managed to arrive at their Master's time of need, then a fight between me and them would be in order."

"Assassin, do you absolutely need to kill the Master?"

She changes her composure. She looked quite confident before I said that.

"I assumed you were going to ask that…"

"Why would you assume that?"

"You don't look like a person that could actually take another's… (sight) you know what, I'll just ask you right now. Matasa, could you actually kill someone?"

There it is again. Could I take someone else's life if needed be? Could I end someone's existence with my own hands? Doing such an awful thing, even if it is a War I'm in. It just sounds so difficult to do, and it probably is.

"Would you be angry at me if I said no…?"

"No. I wouldn't be angry at you. I'd be angry in the fact that you have decided to be part of something, which would require you to take somebody else's life, without taking in that fact. But I guess there is no other way now."

" I already knew what I was getting myself into before becoming a Master. I knew that I would require to take other's lives for us to advance. And I only thought that some way… there would be a more peaceful path that we could take."

How foolish of me. I am a horrible magus if I can't kill anyone. Seems that the only person that I am only planning on killing is… . Anyway, I'm weak. Why had I even considered being part in this, if I couldn't even do that? All I wanted was to do something for my lineage, and I couldn't even take in the fact of killing others. I'm pathetic. I truly don't deserve to be a Gorichi, nor a magus, nor Assassins Master, nor to…

 **Live.**

"Why are you looking so down…?"

"Isn't it obvious? Why am I even your Master when I can't even kill anyone? There, I straight out said it, that I wouldn't be able to kill another Master."

"I had guessed that being the case from the first time meeting you. You probably wouldn't be able to squish a bug if you needed to."

"I think I could do that, but another human being?"

"You shouldn't be moping like that, because first of all, you're ruining this moment which we are having. Second of all, why do you think I am here?"

"To be my Servant in the Holy Grail War."

"Yes, and as one, it is my obligation to act as your weapon against other Servants. Masters provide Servants support while they do the fighting, so you don't require to kill anyone. I just meant that… you should've taken in that fact Mata-chan. For now, you won't have to kill anyone. You're too innocent anyway. I couldn't even imagine you even cutting someone intentionally."

"During a fight, it's not the weapon that kills, but the one wielding it."

"Don't you compare me to an object now. I'm a human being, well, Heroic Spirit, but you get it. Basically, see it my way – we both have the same target, and I'll be the one taking them out, carrying the burden of stealing their life."

"Assassin… I guess I should say that I am sorry…"

"For what?"

"For giving you this burden. I'm probably pathetic in your eyes as a Master…"

"You should shut your mouth about that. You're the best Master I could ever ask for. I will only decide on that on what support you will be providing me, but even now, you're only giving me the hope and will to fight. Other than that, it is my job to seek and destroy my targets. And we are talking about Servants here, who where already dead from the start. Why should I carry the burden of killing something which was already dead to begin with?"

"But what about a Master?"

"This whole topic started with that. So you asked me that, because you don't want to kill the Masters, which are your enemies now, correct?"

I nod. They're living human beings that have their own lives. Even if they're my enemies, I wouldn't want them to die.

"I wouldn't be able to act out if I wasn't given an order from you to dispose of them. I'll always be obedient and loyal to your given tasks, and I will only result in taking out an enemy Master if you order me to. Matasa, my orders and obligations are to fight in this War, and I will do them respectively, so you don't need to kill if you don't have to."

"I'm glad for that, but I still know that you are trying to encourage me, trying to point me out of the path to the reason. As a magus, I am a failure until the end if I can't even do that."

"A path of a killer isn't the best one to take."

"It's already one which has been decided for a magus."

"Mata-chan, which do you think is easier: taking someone else's life, or carrying that burden for the rest of yours?

"But aren't both of those the same?"

"They are, but don't mind that. Which one do you think is easier to do?

You couldn't carry a burden of taking a life without having taken one, so this doesn't particularly make sense…

"I guess carrying the burden would be easier. Even if it's for a longer time, it's still easier than actually doing the deed."

"Would you be willing to… share the burden with me? I don't exactly think that killing would prove one being a magus, but carrying a heavy burden. It can only make someone stronger. In its own way it's as difficult, but you get a more meaningful thing than when taking a life."

Every magus is their own individual that only has a title of their own. They shouldn't particularly be all the same, some are more peaceful than others… I think that is what Assassin has to say. And even if I had to give that order, I would accompany her. It's better to have such a share than have her carrying all that anyway. I will not have Assassin do everything, after all, the both of us are in this together.

"It's obvious that we are in this together. Assassin, I'll take part of the burden. I'll won't be greedy by letting you do all the hard work, what kind of friend would I be then?"

"Haha, yeah. I won't act out without your order. And we are in this together."

She gives me her hand. Another agreement, but this one seems firm. Not as in she's actually squeezing her hand harder than last time, but that it's not as a Master and Servant pact agreement, but as a Friendship pact meaning "we are in the same boat here". She has a quite strong grip though.

"Now that that's out of our ways, why don't we have some last bit of fun before we go."

"What do you exactly mean by that?"

"I want to see more of that daredevil side of yours. That first jump had quite piqued my interest, so I want you to show me more of that side of yours."

"What?! But you said that it was foolish of me to do, and that I shouldn't repeat something like that again! Besides… uh… I don't think I'll be able to do something like that again!"

First she says that she will ensure my safety, and now she wants me be risking my life again? The first stunt was stupid before.

"The first jump you had done, I wasn't prepared for it, but now I most certainly am for an encore of your daredevil-ish abilities. Of course, if you are up for it. I won't force you to do it if you do not want to."

She's probably just looking for a show, but such that would even risk her partner's life? She is a bit insane in that head others, but she is indeed a fun person to be around.

"Well it depends… what will I get if I repeat it?"

"Oh I ensure you, that your reward will truly be an amazing one which you will love."

"You're not even going to be telling me what it is? How cheap of you!"

I am curious of what she has in mind though. Assassin is the kind of person that is full of surprises, and not only bad intended ones.

"So Mata-chan, are you up for putting up an awesome impression of yourself to your Servant?

"… Will I have to do the exact same thing though, but this time landing perfectly on the beam?"

I might just end up not catching myself on anything and fall to the ground. Assassin would then regret her idea…

"Of course not. Anyone could practically jump past such a short distance. It wouldn't please me. I have something else in mind. You better hold on tight now!"

Hold on tight… and she disappears on me, leaving me all alone on the hanging beam. Just to be safer, I grab onto the chain holding the beam in-air tightly, also wrapping my legs around it. I wait for a couple of seconds, and the unexpected happens. I don't know how she actually knows how to operate such a thing, but the crane moves inward from the building, pulling me with the beam away from it.

My hands become sweaty from holding onto the cold chains, also from the anxiety that I am facing at this moment. The whole beam has little weight on it, and with the sudden movements it begins moving back and forth.

"Assassin, what exactly are you planning on doing?"

I'd say that I am about five meters away from the wall of the building, so quite far. Unfortunately I can't spot my deranged Servant anywhere right now. Hopefully she didn't leave me to watch how I get myself out of this situation which I am in.

"Assassin, do you think this is a good i… Ahhhhh!"

The winds are starting to pick up by the minute. This whole thing keeps swinging, and I am loosing leverage on containing my balance. I think this has gotten way too far, even for her. Doesn't seem as if the madness ends here, as I can't imagine what she has planned next, seeing her appear, grabbing and holding herself onto the curves of the wall.

"Hey Mata-chan! Can you hear me from there?! I hope I didn't took you to far hehe!"

"Just please cut to the chase of what I have to do… Eeep!"

"Perfect, he can hear me. Anyway, let's see how the majestic Mata-chan can conquer… The Leap of Faith!"

"Ahhh! Assassin!"

"Oh this would be ideal if only we had an audience, but oh well. Your challenge is to jump into the building before you fall!"

Ok, she is definitely out of her mind. This seems more ridiculous of her forcing me than when I did it myself, though I would rather get somewhere more stable than be here for the moment.

The beam continues to keep swinging back and forth from the building, and I am either getting more or less distance from it. I have to get close enough before jumping into the open wall of building…

This is absurd! What if I hit my head or something on the wall, has she even considered that happening?

"Mata-chan, don't worry! I won't let you fall. Prove to me that you are worthy of being my Master!"

Oh my goodness…

"(sigh) Assassin… you're crazy!"

My jump position was about six metres from the building. I used all of my strength and momentum to push back from the beams surface.

Heh, if Assassin wants to get a show from her Master, than I'll just provide her with one. I manage to lean forward in mid-air and roll myself inward, with that I also gain more momentum. She must've been amazed with that stunt, left speechless and astonished of my effort and determination to try and impress, this will surely have her be surprised.

But unfortunately, the distance between my jumping point and the building was too far apart. Even with the momentum, I fail to manage even grabbing onto the ledge of the surface. Now I am descending in couple of hundred kilometres per hour speed downwards. Seems that I hadn't done enough for it and failed, but at least Assassin got to see that cool front-flip I had done. At the least she'll remember me doing that.

"Well, better luck next time, Master."

"You should give me more preparation time next time."

She did say that she wouldn't let me fall. I of course had believed her.

"Let me guess… is this that reward you said? I thought that you wouldn't give me anything if I had failed."

She was ready to grab me at any given moment. She's quick, even while in mid-air, since she managed to grab me by the abdomen. But honestly… I didn't expect that she could do such an awesome thing as soaring above ground.

"Doesn't matter if you failed to do it, what mattered to me is that you were up for doing it. Your determination proved your winning. And that awesome flip you did. You're a true daredevil Mata-chan."

"Assassin… you're truly amazing."

"Well you should know about the fact of spirits being able to float above ground. It's only natural for a Heroic Spirit to be able to do so. Anyway, where is our next destination, Master?"

We need to visit one more place before ending it for the day and going home. I need to check out something to make sure if a certain someone is doing all right.

"I need to see a certain friend."

"Oh, a certain friend? Seems easy enough, looks as if that friend of yours is out and about this time of night. Just to our luck it seems."

Looks like they're just going home, probably going back from their part-time work. They're pretty close to their house, so I shouldn't worry about them getting home safe.

"No, not him. Remember the house we went to in the morning? I need to get there."

"Right then."

* * *

Fortunately landing was very swift and gentle. The flight with Assassin was definitely something extreme to experience. Literally, best reward she could give me for my failed attempt at jumping between two long-distance platforms.

"That didn't take very long, and fortunately no one was around to witness it."

"Indeed. So what is it that you wanted to investigate? Is that if your friend actually took the lunch meal you had prepared for her?"

"I guess that is one of the reasons. Though would you mind letting me check it out for myself while you go back home."

She seems surprised by that, I had expected her to be. Asking her to go on without me, especially leaving me vulnerable during the night when anyone could possibly attack me. It seems too careless to do, but I want to check it out for myself, since this is more of a personal thing.

"I'll decide on it only if you answer my question: do you actually and truthfully think that leaving you on yourself out here will be a fair action to do?"

"It's only for a couple of minutes, after that I'll go straight home. I'll be back before you know it."

"Master, answer my question please."

She seems serious with this. She's probably asking for a fair response from me, to see as how of a careless Master I am.

"Well, it's not the best idea, but it should be good enough if I am quick."

Staying balanced with it would seem to be the best thing to do. But I don't want her to get mad again.

"Fair enough. Then I will await your return in your residence. Please do be careful and quick though. I don't want to worry too much about what might be happening to you."

With that she disappears in thin air, I can't sense her presence anymore. Well she is quick to leave the area, and now I am left alone on the streets next to Tohsaka-senpai's residence. Hmm… the lights seem to be out, so it may mean that nobody is at home, or perhaps she is sleeping, though it is still pretty early before the time she usually goes to sleep.

Still, I had planned to go to the entrance for a closer look, and to check if my continents are not still laying near the doorstep.

If no one is home, or Tohsaka-senpai is already asleep, which I actually doubt, I don't have to hide myself while trying to get to the entrance.

I can fortunately already see from here that my neatly wrapped box is nowhere to bee seen. Or I may just be blind, it's quite dark and a bit difficult to see, so getting right to there would be for the best, just to make sure.

So even from a distance I was right. No lunchbox in sight. Of course there is a possibility that someone stole it, though it's pretty low. Most of all, I hope that Tohsaka-senpai enjoyed having it, since it's… probably going to be the last one I make for her.

I used to bring her lunch every morning after transferring to Homurahara High. At first I was worried for what she would actually prefer to have, so I ended up bringing her different styled bento boxes with different designs, with them containing different continents every time. I presumed she would be picky with the type of food she prefers, but she always smiled and told my how well I am at preparing food, and that everything I had brought her was good and could only get better. I was worried that she didn't have breakfast, and for her to save any effort of preparing lunch for herself, I started taking up cooking as a hobby. Tohsaka-senpai… inspired me to do a lot of things. I've known her longer than anyone… she is practically… an older sister to me which I don't have.

I'd be happy if I could bring her lunchboxes everyday, to talk with her and walk with her to school, like we always did. Unfortunately… I've taken a path that won't let me do those things anymore, if she doesn't want to talk to me anymore.

 **Abandoning friends for the sake of you winning, to not let them fall into grief. How quant, it's very common of you, it is only because you care about your friends more than you care about our own well-being. It's very brave… yet foolish.**

Tohsaka-senpai, I don't expect to receive forgiveness, from acting on these kind of selfish ways, just so that I wouldn't feel guilty of putting you in possible grief, but I want to apologize. Even if my time does come during the war, I want to say… that I am sorry.

I'm probably a very horrible friend… who just abandons his own for that kind of bias sake, but it still ends up being very selfish to do… I care very much for you.

You had made me into such a new person… through hard times and such, when I had nobody else… I couldn't thank you more… for what you have done for me. Knowing you since five years of age, you were my longest friend, who practically stayed near the end. I can't expect when I will die, but it should be pretty soon.

If this is a farewell that is after this note, even when you are possibly not even here, then I guess I should only make it more superficial. I'm only getting started in a war, and I could die any given moment, after that happens, you might just become a different person.

 **Losing someone close would definitely change someone for who they are, it's only natural to happen, when a person loses someone so close, they would end up going for the worst path possible.**

I don't though. I shouldn't betray on Assassin's words and just give up on it. I'll be… acting out as usual if you talk to me again. I can't predict that it will be the same, but I will only do what is best for you, Tohsaka-senpai. If possible, I won't try to act as selfish as possible to you. It's only if destiny decides to reunite us again, and I can only hope for that to happen… while I am still alive.

Tohsaka-senpai, don't worry. I have Assassin to protect me. She's truly an amazing person. And I won't give up that easily. I'm a magus after all, and you will be my reason for staying alive and to keep on fighting, waiting for those final days when we can finally talk to each other once more… as friends. You have other friends as well, they'll take care of you if anything does happen to me.

And I guess just try to always be yourself. Despite the fact that you tend to be fairly hot-headed, I enjoy that kind of personality of yours. You are always determined to get what you want, and you only try to achieve it.

Anyway, I have a lot and lot of other things that I would like to say, but I am having hope Senpai. I'll keep clinging onto it as much as possible, fighting for the reason that I have, I will not let go of the bond of which we have formed.

I promise, Tohsaka-senpai.


	4. Light at the End

_Introduction_

* * *

 _Day 3_

* * *

 _Light at the End_

* * *

Something seems to be off about her. Usually Assassin is very talkative in the mornings. Maybe she just hasn't gotten any sleep in the past few days. She's been up on the rooftop through the whole nights. I should ask her about it.

"Mata-chan, I can spot that worrisome look you have on your face."

Obviously.

"I don't really know if it is true, but do Servants need to sleep from time to time? It sounds like it would be pretty beneficial."

"Oh, so that's why you look worried. Well do not care about it. To answer your question, Servants don't entirely need to rest like humans do, though sleeping does serve some sorts of our needs, like preserving the magical energy we have. Though that doesn't really account for me, since I haven't even experienced any type of actions that would use a certainly big percentage of my mana, nor would I really require to do that anyway."

"Would it really be that bad for you to take a short rest from time to time? I don't mind it entirely, actually, I would much like it if you decided to take some hours to rest, then I would worry less about you. I have given you permission to the room I have assigned for you, so that you can do as you please."

Perhaps during the daytime if she could. Assassin has been doing a pretty well job of looking out for the residence during night time, but I would prefer it if she could somewhat rest during the day, even if she hasn't really done anything exhausting.

"I'm having the best rest that I could have at this moment. You couldn't even comprehend how dull it is standing outside for countless hours with nothing interesting happening. I am relieved every moment when I can spend the morning with you Master."

"I didn't even tell you to stay the whole time on the roof, so it's your decision to do so. You're free to have a break from time to time whenever you want, and you can go around the house as much as you like, but I would prefer it if you wouldn't leave the premises."

"I've already accustomed with the house during my first night here, and the only place that I haven't visited yet is your bedroom. I have my dignity to not go into your private room without your permission."

"There's nothing really interesting in there anyway, since I am only there when I am either sleeping, or sometimes doing homework, though I mainly do that in the study since it is more convenient."

"Still, you know how someone is interested in seeing how one's room is like."

I've never even given her prohibition of entering my bedroom, yet she is indeed polite in that manner, and very curious.

"Well, I might as well just show it to you a bit later. But that isn't what I wanted to know. I had to ask something, of you. Is there something wrong?"

"It isn't all about if I am slightly fatigued of my patrol, but it's been two days since I have been summoned, and that is what I have been implying – nothing has been happening."

She's right. These past two days have been pretty calm, as if the War hasn't even started, we have spotted nothing out of the ordinary, not even a clue of a Servant or Master anywhere. I've only been spending time getting to know Assassin, and it has indeed been worthwhile of it, but we do need to start something.

"It has only been two days. Are you saying that both of them have went to waste?"

"What are you even thinking? Not at all, these first two days have been very beneficial for the both of us, and very sweet in a sense of manner. I'm not saying entirely that we need to have any kind of information on our enemies, even though that would be very good, I'm saying about the option of acting in on something, or at least beginning to consider it. Let's not forget in what thing we are part of now."

If we don't start doing anything, than we are being put in a disadvantage, and possibly in an unguarded state of being attacked by our enemies. Though I couldn't really imagine where we could start looking.

"This seems a bit like some reconnaissance meeting than a morning tea time, don't you think?"

"We are in a war after all, I had partly intended to discuss such a topic during this time, with of course the main aim being to spend the morning time with my lovely Master."

"Indeed. But I will guess that you are right."

"I am right Mata-chan. We need to act before our enemies get the upper hand before us, and starts moving towards both you and me while we are at a disadvantage. If we can get something on, we can use it and take them out, fortunately before they even know about it."

"But there is one problem. I have very little leads at the moment, actually, I could say that I have none. I apologize about that. So I am all up for a search for clues and information on our enemies. I kind of feel as if a search would be quite interesting."

"Despite the circumstances – I hope that is what you were implying. But a search does sound interesting, and of course beneficial."

"Of course I meant it like that."

"Yes. We will start on that whenever you think that the time is appropriate, though I do hope that it will be soon."

"That search had already started, our efforts have only been the one thing lacking."

It's a good idea to be the active part in this. I don't want to do nothing, I have to, or we won't get anywhere in that rate. Taking up action is our current priority if we want to be ahead.

"I don't particularly want to mix this in with my everyday life, so we'll only be able to do so during the time when I am not at school. I hope that you aren't against it."

"Not at all, it's for you to call decisions after all, I will only listen to what you tell me to do and be obedient. It would only be beneficial for you to continue your studies, even during the War.

I'm glad to have such an understanding companion.

"I shouldn't force my Master to work on finding our competitors twenty four seven hours a day, I don't have the rights to do that, and it would be better for us to take it a bit slow in pace, don't you think so? We'll be working on them anyway."

On an account, I disagree on that, but at the same time…

"I don't mind it if it's after school hours, I would rather try to progress in it than to do something that isn't as beneficial to me anyway. Don't forget that this is our priority, besides, we haven't really done anything yet now, have we?"

"Hmm… then I guess we'll let it go out by itself. If we have any leads, we should go with them, but for now our priority should be finding some kind of information."

"You are already familiar with the layout of the city, correct? I wouldn't mind giving you another tour if you would like that."

It would be a rather fun time to go out with Assassin again, I had the time of my life yesterday, spending the evening on showing her the city from the building, despite some circumstances.

"I would enjoy repeating the events of yesterday, but I'll speak honestly and say that another one like that would only be a waste of precious time that we have. Don't take it crudely Mata-chan, I liked the time we had yesterday, and even though we perhaps have the best view of the whole city from there, it isn't the best to stare from one point of view now, isn't it?"

"I had actually meant going around the city this time. There are other places that you should see not just from the skyscraper, and it would be best to get to know the layout of it as best as possible."

I would really love to take Assassin to the beach shore. It looks absolutely stunning during the evening, especially when there is a sunset behind the ocean waves. She would definitely love that.

"I don't mind it then. Whenever you think that a time when we can do that does come, then know that I am all up for it. It's quite a fun activity to go sightseeing, especially in a different location."

"You're sort of like a tourist in Fuyuki."

Once you look at her, you can instantly spot that Assassin isn't Japanese, even without her such Western noble clothing, she doesn't look of Asian descendants.

"So this is your first time in Japan?"

"It's my first time in a different country…"

She instantly stops there. She probably almost blurted something out about her identity and decided to stop at the last second about it. I don't want to push my dear friend with it, so I just won't ask anything.

"You're not the only one. I myself have never left Japan as well. I've been here all of my life practically."

Seems as if she is surprised by what I had said.

"That's fairly unexpected, I would've thought that at least once you had gone to some foreign lands."

"I never had such an opportunity. I didn't really have any possible way or the time to try even. School for me has been very busy for the past years. I don't mind it though."

Truthfully speaking, I would very much like to visit a foreign country. I have more than enough wealth to do so anytime I want, but it doesn't really seem as if I'll have such an opportunity now though.

"Only hope Master, that one day you can be free of your confinements and be able to explore more of the world. There is much more of it to see, and with your age you are still able to do it freely without any worries."

I would do that, but unfortunately, my confinements are unbreakable, and I will never be able to free them, though I can still at least dream on them.

"Of course that will only happen if we manage to survive the Holy Grail War, hehe. One of the incentives for you can be to try fresh foreign tea from those different nations, instead of them having to be shipped here."

"I'll bet on you being right. There are still probably so many types that I haven't tried out yet, I must try them. Maybe I should put out an order on another shipment, maybe one's from India."

I love Assassin's black tea so much. It tastes much better than yesterday. I wonder if she did something else to make it taste this well, or just got used to it and made it better. I take the whole cup and sip it into my throat with one big slurp, without making that god awful sound of course, I have my manners.

"Do you perhaps need a refill?"

I kindly oblige to her offer by handing her my empty fine cup china.

"Mata-chan, would you mind if I started making different blends? I don't want you or me to get bored of drinking the same black ones every day."

"Not at all. Do whatever you think is best, but hadn't you said that you aren't familiar with other types than black?"

"How hard could it be to make it from another blend? Just pour hot water on the leaves, let it sit for about a minute and done. Isn't that how it should be done?"

I nod as she hands me my refilled cup.

"Yes, but it also differs on how long do you leave the leaves in the water depending on the type of tea. You usually leave the more bitter and caffeine rich tea leaves in for less than normal."

"I had already known that, don't take me for some kind of fool now, or I'll feel offended by that, you little rascal."

"Rascal? Where did that kind of word come from?"

"You should know that I am sometimes known to make very rude insults to people that I'm not very fond of. I won't be using very vulgar language with you though."

That… doesn't really seem to fit the situation… Oh well.

"Well, I am a bit interested in seeing that side of you. You have proven to me on being full of interesting surprises."

"You just wait Mata-chan. Wait, and one day, you will truly get to know my awesome personality much more than you are now. Preferably during combat."

"Same for you I guess."

"Is there something that you are hiding from me, Mata-chan?"

…

"Of course there is, there are many things that I haven't told to you, and with the given time, I'll only reveal them to you. Hopefully you'll be doing the same for me as well."

Hopefully she's not considering on pushing me about my secrets. I let her off the hook every time about her identity, so she could at the least consider respecting my secrets.

 **Only part of it. Most beings have secrets that they even keep from themselves, not even being known of their existence. Secrets are kept to be away from society's intruders, though sometime… they can even be kept away from yourself – your deepest, darkest, most secluded secrets, sleeping away in the core of your consciousness where you aren't able to easily reach them. They may as well just be kept away… to keep you sane.**

"Very well then. But be known that sometimes it is best to reveal information that may just be for your well-being, everyone's well-being."

"I've already laid out everything I had wanted to say regarding our actions and all that. I wouldn't even consider keeping them away from you."

If I ever find out anything that would be beneficial for our progression, I'll inform about it to Assassin as soon as possible. I could get her comprehension on it, and we'd be fairly advanced. Private wishes… I don't really think that their exchange matters at this point. I'm curious to know what Assassin would want to do with the Grail, but if I did ask that, she would only ask mine in return… I can't go with it sadly. I'll just have to wait for a time when possibly Assassin reveals it to me on her own, if she actually does that.

"Anyway, since we have been talking about so much about our own secrets and regarded topics, how about I finally let you see my room."

"Oh I've been waiting for you to say that. I would be obliged on so. Please lead the way Mata-chan."

* * *

It's been a fairly long time since I had anyone else visit my bedroom, it's not something I would really want to show to anyone anyway, but I can feel Assassin's curiosity of wanting to see it for herself.

"…Is this it?"

Though after all, from the looks of it, she seems disappointed. What did she expect to find in here?

"I told you that I don't use it that much."

"The whole interior of this mansion seems to be only decorated in expensive antique furniture, even the bedroom you assigned to me was very elaborate. I expected to at the least see your room to look much nicer since you were using it."

"I'm already satisfied by how it is, so I don't need to bother redecorating it."

I had expected her being disappointed with how this looked, but it doesn't seem to be as bad as I had thought she would. I try to live in a modern era of style so you could say, though there are some quite old and expensive furniture here mixed with that as well, since I didn't want to bother with changing it completely. I'm glad to have a least one normal bed that gives me the right amount of space to sleep.

"Oh! This is something new for me."

Her attention is caught to the windowsill, which was quite spacious, so I decided to make it a bit more comfortable of a seating area. It's nice looking out of the window from there. Assassin immediately runs up to it and comforts herself on the cushions.

"This is very nice. I am much more satisfied with your room now Master, though wouldn't you think that some sorts of art would make it look a bit better?"

"Is how my bedroom decorated matter so much to you? You're not an interior designer, or are you?"

"I'm just giving some tips and opinions. It wouldn't hurt to change some things up a bit in here, don't you think?"

"I'll consider doing it. Would be good to put some kind of use to all of those paintings in the basement, though a lot of them only seem creepy to me, and I wouldn't want them staring at me while I work or sleep."

"That basement is indeed eerie, oh, why did you have to summon me in there, I had to wait for your return for a long time while I was alone in the pitch black darkness."

Indeed. Even though there were some other areas where I could've summoned her, for safety precautions, I had used the basement because it was the best secluded room in the manor, and… I had a feeling in there, it was how Assassin implied, eerie, but I felt more… unnerving, yet calm at the same time. Weird sensation.

"You don't like to personally show off to others about yourself."

"What?"

"You tend not to make yourself look that much of standing out, whether it be appearance or personality. Look at everything around here, you have the option of making yourself look a bit more noticeable, yet you avoid that, trying to make everything look simple. It's a bit as if you are secluded from your title…"

Why should I even bother of standing out? I don't really think I deserve to do that even. I enjoy being a simple individual by appearance, and I try doing that with personality, everything. Despite that, I am a mage, so I already stand out of society, but without anyone really knowing about it. Just staying simple in society's eyes just seems best for me really.

"It's a simple reason that I have already mentioned before."

"You did, but I have a slight feeling that it isn't just that being the case. It's been itching at me since the night I had met you, growing each day since then. It's off-putting that even someone such as yourself seems so simple of a person, respecting me so much as you had met me instantly, which I very much appreciate and of course deserve, but it is strange."

If only I was able to freely talk with her, about anything, but there are limits with even her, Assassin, my Servant, and most importantly, someone who I could consider an already close friend. I just can't do it.

 **The fall of your plans will only be the result of that. What will she think of you? Only pity, knowing of what her friend wishes of their well-being, your emotions will be triggered, it will only end worse for you, you'll want it to end even sooner, by making someone close so upset because of your selfishness. At the end, you won't get anything you wanted, but the opposite.**

"I guess I could say that I have a bit of a low self-esteem. I've been fond of the world of mage craft practically all of my life since, and this sort of trait can easily make someone special in a way, and to that, I have done a lot, studied a lot and trained, learning everything I am able to from each and every one of my studies…"

"And how does that make you feel so lowly of yourself? You are indeed special even without being a magus!"

"It only lead me to think, that all of these traits that I have, would just make me feel that way, to just be noticeable, and personally, I don't want that to happen, and it just so lead to it..."

I thought about lying to her, thinking that stating something that could be a bit off-setting would only make her realise it. This is the truth, not all of it, but it certainly is it.

"But I am trying my best to rise it up, and being around you is just enhancing its speed, yes, definitely, I can't even believe in my luck of being around such an awesome person such as yourself."

"I'm glad for that, but you shouldn't have that only be it, you have to think about yourself for once, and realise the fact that you are indeed special. Everyone would want to be in your shoes right now, not everyone is born with the knowledge of magic you know."

"You shouldn't automatically assume that being a mage is the best, we are in a war after all, and I have to hide that information from a lot of people, especially close friends, it's proven to be a rather tough challenge, I can't even let anyone enter the basement, fortunately not that many people come into the house anyway, just as I prefer it."

"And I am here the one thinking that you like to keep others out to not present on how wealthy you are."

"Of course that isn't the reason."

"Why avoid that? You could just lock the basement doors and it would be fine. If it so happened that they asked on what was in there, you could just say something more believable like a torture chamber."

"How is that in any way believable?"

"It's more believable than saying that you have a magic workshop in there."

Both of those sound similarly ridiculous, and the torture chamber is something that could cause more of a problem and a negative opinion.

"I always keep it locked up anyway, but you know what might happen."

"You seem as if you are being too secluded to yourself. You need to work on that."

"I am working on it right now."

"With someone that isn't your Servant."

"What would be the difference from talking to someone else other than you?"

"Look, having a Servant being your only friend isn't healthy in standards, we've only met through the circumstances of the Holy Grail War, and are connected by it. Be a bit more out of your current situation, sociable with others, it will only be better for you. That Emiya Shirou kid you were talking to yesterday, be more sociable with people like him, and don't seclude yourself with me, for the remainder, try having a normal socially healthy lifestyle."

…I'll stop thinking about it. If Assassin wants it to happen, I may as well try.

"As long as we can hang out too, I'll try my best at it."

"Of course, my presence will always be sensible next to you when you need me the most."

She gives me a heart-warming smile. It's unbelievable how nice of a person Assassin is, I can't even think of a minor bad thing that she could've done in her life.

It's time for me to get out of my shell anyway, despite the circumstances. Assassin wants me to, and I truly need to do it for myself. I feel relief in that… I don't want to though, reminding myself of my goal. I can't think about it, I can do it, but I can't have it be in my mind all the time. Staying neutral will just seem to be the best thing right now.

"I should get a bit of an evaluation."

"What evaluation?"

"If I'm going to be letting you be more sociable with that Emiya Shirou, I should know more about him, don't you think so?"

"Wasn't I supposed to be more free with who I can bond with?"

"You are, but I am still curious about him."

"I've known Emiya-senpai for many years now, and all that I could tell you that he is the nicest person you could ever meet. Helpful, honest, trustworthy, and even more than that, he is truly an outstanding person."

Saying those I remember the events of before yesterday, when Emiya-senpai helped me in the classroom, of course you can't compare such a little thing to everything else he ever did to others. An everyday hero so you could say, I truly respect him.

"He would help anyone in the time of need, without even expecting anything for him in return. The gratitude from others is more than enough for him, that's what at least he says."

"Sounds like someone easy to manipulate."

What kind of assumption is that?

"You aren't very close with him though, aren't you?"

"It's a bit complicated."

"How complicated?"

"… ."

"Matasa…?"

"I only started talking again to him recently. It had been a while before that. I… never really expected to have the chance of being able to talk normally with him again, it was on the day that I summoned you as well, a lot had happened that I am grateful."

Now that I recall, if I hadn't came to school early that day, then I maybe wouldn't have had that happening ever again.

"Hmmm, well, at least now you can try at it again. He seems to want to be your friend again. Take the chance while you have it available. I believe I said this before, finding a person like that is truly rare."

"I'll take it. I'll put Emiya-senpai my priority. He should be up to do something. He's always like that when he has time."

"I won't ask the details. The past doesn't really matter if the future is but brighter, holding many possibilities that could only provide you with happiness."

She stares out the window as she says it. The sun shines in my eyes. Seems to be a nice day today.

Yes hopefully, today will be the usual.

* * *

"Are you joking with me Mata-chan? Do you truly think that that is a good idea?"

"It's not that I think that it's good, I'd say it doesn't even go in being either bad or good."

I had expected this to happen from her, but she should first hear me out about it.

"Even it being difficult for someone to distinguish you from being a Master, anything could happen to you at anytime. What if the school gets attacked and I am not there for you?"

"Then I'll just take care of that situation myself."

"Do you actually think that would be possible? Do you assume that you would be able to take on perhaps an enemy Servant by yourself?"

"Assassin, you're forgetting the main thing of it…"

She's way more worried about me leaving her here without even thinking of all the precautions at my disposal…

"This IS the main thing of it! You going off by yourself without your guard will put you at most vulnerable against our enemies. I wouldn't have thought of you to be so careless, my own Master, seems that I'll have to educate you so that your mindset would be appropriate for a Master to have."

I just found another similarity we both seem to have – being oblivious, though I seem to be more aware of my surroundings than her at this moment. I'm hoping that she will eventually notice it, and I don't have to point it out to her.

"Should I ask you as a friend or a Master?"

"Ask me of what, to leave without me? You should do it in both ways at once."

She stills sounds angry about it. Maybe this is a rather dumb idea from me. Oh well.

"Assassin, you will let me go alone and that is final. You told me yourself I should start getting more sociable with others."

"Would I be a distraction for you in socialising with that friend of yours? I'm truly hurt by your words Master."

"It's not that you would be a distraction, and it isn't just with Emiya-senpai or Tohsaka-senpai. I want to go back a little bit, be a bit more regular at school, also without having you comment so negatively about everybody."

I can tell she's itchy to see new people and lay shade on them.

"That's a bad habit on my part, I will admit, but it is only for the better. Examining each individual thoroughly may lead me to a clue of them being an enemy Master. I'm being the most precautious that I can be."

"Well you can for some time be precautious out of school grounds while I am living and trying to educate myself. I don't want your bad habit to force you on badmouthing my acquaintances, it's so low of you."

Hoping that I hadn't put that in too bad of words, I don't want to be hurting Assassin's feelings now.

"Look who's talking about bad-mouthing other's on their habits. Then again, you are too young too understand, I still have to work a bit on you."

"Can you trust me on that I will make it up to you, after I come back?"

"If you do actually return."

"Assassin, I'll have a surprise for you on my return, so be expectant of it, that's why I don't want you to come and stay here, it's a surprise, so I can't show it to you yet."

To make it better, I try to say it in a cuter tone, she seems persuaded, yet I can still feel a tint of that previous irritation from her.

"There's no hope in it, so do what you want. I'll abide to my Master's order. If anything happens, retreat or contact me immediately. Just know that I will be worried every second you are away from me and vulnerable to predators."

At least she realised it, though what she said after is lingering on me, on how she implied it, it's horrible…

"I'll be back in the evening, since I'll have to do a bit of studying at school, research that will be beneficial for us you could say."

"Tch…!"

Presuming saying 'back in the evening, had triggered her uneasiness, oh well, I'll give her a bit more time away from me, hopefully she doesn't have some kind of phase while I'm not around.

…Huh? I was combing my hair and she vanished. Could she possibly not have bare to see me leave her alone for the remainder of the day? No, she went to go pick something up.

"At the least take these with you."

Even though I told her not to bother with it, she still ended up surprising me, finding her again, preparing this day's breakfast in double. I presumed she had only begun preparing everything while I had came in, but she was only putting back the ingredients in the fridge and putting the contents in the bento boxes, so I decided to help her finish everything.

"I'll be fine with you preparing the tea every morning if you please, just the tea, and not anything else."

"I wanted to thank you for yesterday, and knowing that you would only make one for yourself this time, I made two."

One for me and another one for…

"Have it yourself or give it to someone else, I don't really care, as long as you feed yourself properly, and you better not have it go to waste."

"Don't worry, I won't let your had work and effort be for nothing, thanks."

I take the boxes, which one is… actually wrapped up the same cloth I had used yesterday for Tohsaka-senpai's lunch hox. I remember those patterned kittens on it…

Wait a second… I never got the lunchbox back from Tohsaka-senpai, and I remember only having one of these cloths. How is it here now?

"Assassin, where did you get this cloth from?"

"Oh, my apologies Matasa. I had forgotten to inform you of the fact that I had found the lunchbox next to the front entrance once I had returned, your friend must've come to return it after using it."

Tohsaka-senpai had come here after school? I wouldn't have actually minded if she had kept the bento box. Maybe she wanted to talk to me about something, and in doing so, decided to return the bento box while coming here, but I wasn't there to greet her.

Wonder if it was good to not be here at the time, or would it have been better to be here… Well, in any case, I'm glad it's here, and that Assassin had used it in wrapping up the bento boxes.

"The box was neatly wrapped, and the inside was…

 **Time is ticking while you are wasting it away on unnecessary things.**

"Thank you Assassin, I have to go now. Try not to leave the perimeter of the house while I am absent, I will return after school. Have a nice day without me."

"Ummm… very well. Good luck at school, and don't have me waiting for too long, also watch out for anything bad that might happen, and please try not to act carelessly, last thing I want to happen is for…."

"You're acting a lot like a mother or an older sister, not that I really mind it."

"I'm just advising you to be safe out there, now go bugger off Mata-chan."

She starts shooing me away with her hand, it's only natural for her to do it right now, especially after what I had said.

Assassin as a mother figure… no, she's not that old, maybe just and older sister, yes, I could see that being the case.

* * *

Hope that she will be fine on her own for today, and doesn't start missing me too much.

"I'm already missing you Mata-chan!"

"I only just left a minute ago. For what distance are we able to communicate telepathically with each other?"

"I'd say fairly long, I think we could even manage to communicate with each other while you're at the school.

"That's too convenient."

I was expecting to have a day like before yesterday, where I was alone with myself. Not that I don't want to talk with Assassin but, she might just find out about what I have in mind for the surprise I plan for her, and that wouldn't be good.

"…Matasa, it depends on your permission to let our speeches be transferred to each other, you have the right to block them whenever you please to."

"Oh, I'm sorry Assassin, I'd like to talk with you all day if I could, but then the surprise would be ruined."

"It's obvious that that is not it."

Now I feel ashamed of that, and I don't know what to say to her.

"It's perfectly fine Mata-chan, I won't be a bothersome to you while at school."

"You aren't a bothersome to me. Where do you even get these assumptions from?"

"I know that I wouldn't really be helping you by conversing with you while you are learning, I'll just do whatever comes to mind here and patrol the perimeters while keeping everything here under check, worry about yourself anyway, doing that will be your favour for me."

If she gets herself preoccupied with something, then I guess I shouldn't worry too much about her. I'll be coming back after school, talk about what we had been doing for the day while having a nice warm beverage in the evening possibly, and then it starts.

I have no idea of where to start, but I'm presuming that the best choice would be to patrol the whole city for any irregular activity that might lead us to possibly the whereabouts of an enemy Master, and then… the main objective of ours will finally start.

I will be providing Assassin with support, and if that won't work…

 **Result to offensiveness.**

I will if that doesn't work. Just supporting her wouldn't really…

I shouldn't think about this yet. I'll just resort to doing what comes naturally and just go with it when it actually happens, and not worry about it now. I have things to do now anyway.

* * *

I've started going out earlier to try and avoid encountering a certain someone, doing that, time is much earlier, so that leads to the amount of individuals in the streets be less in numbers.

It's quite nice to live here instead of the more urban area where the streets are pact with people, it's much more quiet, quite a bliss for me. It's quite nice to be alone for once in a while from everybody, not that it's the best to do, but just being by one's self is very calming, not looking at the other matters at hand, but living in the present and now, while walking to school in the empty streets of the less populated side of the city.

I should come back in the evening after I have done some research in the library. Don't know how long it will take, since I will have to write down some notes for the upcoming test, which is due in a couple of days. Been too occupied with the Holy Grail War and all, and haven't even gotten a chance of doing anything much studying. Oh how I hope that I have enough time to get ready for it. It would be bad to go down in grades and ruin my flawless marks just because of that, not to mention Assassin would probably feel rather guilty because of that.

How will I even be able to mix two of these duties of mine? Well, a magus should be ready for anything that befell on them at any time, so this is only little training for me, and I have to prove myself of that, keeping both of these duties in check. Maybe taking some days off from school would be rather beneficial for us, both not at the moment, perhaps after I have done the test.

Then again, I might just die before that even comes. Dying at any possible moment, not even expecting it coming to take you away, even though you are expecting it to happen at any time, you can't truly expect it to happen, it's the unexpectable, you can't predict when you will truly die, because death is the unknown. It tangles on you when you least expect it, and drives it's deadly fangs into you, taking your soul away and leaving nothing but a carcass on the ground, to let it decay and be part of the earth where it belongs, being imbedded into the true reality, eventually being forgotten that such a being existed, with time, it takes.

When will I die? Will it be during the war or after? I don't know the answer to that, only Death and Time will now. Whatever happens, my death will be the because of the Holy Grail no matter what it seems, so I know who for what I have ceased to exist and pass onto the afterlife. It's a bit dreadful, knowing what will be the cause of your death, some might just go insane from knowing the reason, possibly even not wanting to expect the unexpected and result to taking their own lives to avoid the pain that is waiting for them, but it may just lead them to befall in eternal suffering, may it not?

Am I even in the status of expecting it to happen, even though I don't know when, I just know that it will? I'm not scared or nervous of it, I'm very calm about it, very calm and in my best composure, I must be ready for anything, and be ready for anything instant. I will only be in the middle of upcoming battles, with a high risk of dying. I could be stabbed while my attention is not at its best, I could be bludgeoned while knowing that it is happening, yet not fast or nimble enough to do anything about, and just end up meeting my maker at the end of some sort of weapon, or could a Servant beat my head in with their bare hands, bashing in my brain into a thin layer and nothing being above my neck anymore. What a horrible way to die, but there are obviously worse that could happen, even more painful ones, but I don't think that my imagination is capable on imagining anything worse that that really, even though I have quite the imagination, but thinking about these sort of thing, I just really don't know about them, maybe if I tried enough, but not now.

I'll try as much as I am able to keep on going in it, and be ready for anything that might happen. If I am not at the time of it actually happening, then I will try to hold my composure and think of a solution for it. I can't die or Assassin won't have a Master and will be terminated from the battle. I don't want it to be my fault, I have to more of a reason to continue, just for her.

 **What reason will you have to continue if your companion's death follows before yours? With them being more in battle, their chances of meeting the end will be much higher than yours. Will you be ready for when that time happens?**

I won't let her die that easily. I will protect her as much as she will protect me. We will be always covering each others backs, and won't let anything happen to each other, that won't…

 **The unexpected is a mystery that can't be forseen until it is at its action.**

I… I won't think about that happening. I couldn't imagine Assassin dying that easily, even though I haven't seen her fight, I know she is strong, her mana expenditure is incredible, so she can only be the strongest Servant. On her own she won't die that easy, and if I cover her, the chances of that happening are close to…

 **Disbelieving the unexpected will only make it worse for thyself. It's utterly pathetic to expect it to not happen and be such a selfish assumption to be it. This assumption will only lead to worse results if not taken into matters, then again, seems like you only require them.**

Not thinking about it. I'll think about them when they actually happen. I told myself before, I won't think about them now, it's unnecessary anyway.

Her house is pretty visible from anywhere. She should be finishing dressing up by know. I've calculated these way too thorough. It was necessary to ask Tohsaka-senpai on how long she takes to get ready to go out, so that I stop by during the appropriate time, and that she wouldn't have to pick up her pace just for me. I wouldn't want to force her on doing it just because of me. But now it's irrelevant really.

Maybe I'll meet her at school again. What do I know?

Maybe I'll even meet Emiya-senpai. I practically stood up his kind offer yesterday, thinking that I was only being a burden, I wanted to let the past go from him. It's unnecessary to keep it for my sake. He should have his free life, like he has been having.

Talking to him yesterday was really nice, even though it seemed rather serious from my side, as to not force him on me. He should be free from the past, not like we used to.

But Assassin wants me to start a new book. I don't know if I want to make a sequel or a completely new story, because it may just involve both sides. I still don't know if I should even talk to him again. I don't even know if I'll even get the chance to do it again, I've been having a lot of them happen before me recently, but haven't been taking them in, just leaving them behind unused.

But he is kind, and what I had said yesterday might not have gotten that much in his head, hopefully, just hopefully, Emiya-senpai will talk to me again.

Like any other day, students begin to arrive at the school one by one, not any acquaintances of mine though, unfortunately.

Wondering if at any moment Emiya-senpai might show up, but with that, waiting here might have me encounter Tohsaka-senpai. Then again, he might already be in the school building, he always comes early. Maybe I should've came earlier…

Oh well, if I am fortunate enough, I might just meet him in the halls during lunch break or after classes end. I won't be leaving for a while, so maybe he'll stay to help with maintenance at the student council room, hopefully.

A day without Assassin, meaning that my focus will be more sharp, but then I'll only be slowly dying of boredom during classes. Oh well, I'm used to this anyway…

What… is this?

It's faint, but I can feel something obscure in the air, my reflexes are starting to tingle a bit, this is unexpected, but of course possible.

An activated sigil in the area? No, it's coming right in front from me – the school building. I'm not mistaken, it's somewhere in the building, but its effects are indistinguishable, I can only tell that something with a source of magical energy is in the building.

I need to get into the building as soon as possible…

It's… even worse than I had presumed it to be. Now that I am closer, I can feel its effects affecting the surrounding area. It's a Bounded Field. Not the one with similar at my house, this one's effects are much more negative.

A bit weird, I only felt the throbbing for a split second, but it's slowly degrading now. I'm presuming that it's just a passive effect. It's absorbing the magical energy from any living form that enters the area, though it's rather slow, it's still only at its first levels of activation, so it should only have been put up recently.

That's all that I can presume it to be. I need to find the source of it. Luckily no one is able to feel it because of the low amount of magical energy in their bodies, but me myself, I know something is wrong around here.

Only a magus can put something like this around here, meaning that's what we are dealing with - an enemy Master.

I can think of a reason for why they decided to put this up here, but I must first examine the sigil, or possibly sigils, that are emitting this field. It could even be far worse than I am presuming it to be.

Out of all the places, they decided to put it in my school? Emiya-senpai, my friends are here, and they're being affected by this at the moment. I can't let it continue. I'll stop their work, I'll remove this field, I'll…

 **End their sinful deed.**

* * *

I couldn't focus much during first period, I was way too worried about the Bounded Field around the whole school.

The effects of it are much more potent inside the building than it was outside, if only by a little, meaning that the sigil, or most of them enabling the Bounded Field are inside the school building. Fortunately the effects of it are rather weak at the moment, I can't feel it draining anything really anymore, but it doesn't mean that I should ignore it, this is a serious matter.

The first signs of magus activity, inside my own school, it's as if I hit a goldmine, but of misfortune. It's the first clue to get about an enemy Master at the moment, so it's a start, and a rather grim one to be for sure.

At the moment I am able to pinpoint a few locations of the sigils enabling the Bounded field, each a relatively far amount from each other, expanding the Bounded Fields area of affection. They're most likely hidden so that no one else would be able to locate them easily, luckily I already know where they are hidden, the amount of magical energy they are giving off is rather abundant, the perpetrators didn't do the most they could do in hiding them.

I should get to them before anything worse may happen, or somebody finds them before I am able to deal with them, but for now…

I have to finish eating my rice.

This is rather good, I was expectant of my dear Servant to prepare something this delicious being by my own forged recipe, I see no difference for it being from my own prepared ones. Maybe it wouldn't be bad for her to make this for me every single morning if possible…

But then I would lose my touches on cooking, she will just maybe assist me in making them then, with the both of us, we would be able to finish it much quicker and have more time for tea time. She was even generous to add a cup of tea leaves into the box set, so I had obliged myself in preparing a few rounds for myself and some of my classmates who were rather parched.

From the taste I can tell that these are lemon shavings and black currants. It's a bit sour than the usual, but still a rather good beverage to mix with the rice…

If Assassin heard me speaking like that, she would probably end me, or at least be mad at me.

Now that I have finished this wonderful lunch, I have to think of what to do with the spare one she had prepared with this as well.

Well, I know I have to somehow get it to Tohsaka-senpai, but somehow. I don't know how.

I want to give this to her again. She's probably starving as I am thinking of what to do with this bento box set. I… don't want to present it directly to her. I'm still hesitant of encountering her again.

Now I know where her classroom is, so I could just go there and drop it off while she isn't there, but that is also the problem. I have no idea if she is there at the moment or not.

I should've thought this through way better while I had the chance, I am wasting time here, and Tohsaka-senpai isn't getting her daily income of food. This is horrible, I must do something about it or she may just starve to death, and it will be because of me.

Heck, I don't even know if she is at school today, she may as well be absent today as well. I know nothing at the moment, and I won't know and fail if I don't do something. I'm wasting precious time by just sitting here, contemplating on what to do next.

Best to just take it into action instead of doing nothing, but first, I must make sure that the coast is clear in the hallways. I peak my head through the corner of the door into the hall, luckily for me, no signs of her.

In fact, I see something much better than expected, something that may just help me in this situation, need to act quick and get to her before she leaves for the stairs.

I exit quickly into the hallways and hurriedly walk a couple of steps from my classroom to the stairs, she already went up them, so I make my way to the floor above through them, where the person I want to quickly speak to. I manage just in time.

"Oh, you startled me, good morning Gorichi-chan…!"

I didn't mean to sneak up on Saegusa-senpai like that, she does seem rather surprised of me coming to greet her, especially surprised with the contents in my hands.

"Good morning Saegusa-senpai. Sorry for that, I just wanted to ask you something, this will be very quick."

"Oh, Gorichi-chan. You want me to…!"

Saegusa-senpai is in the same class with Tohsaka-senpai, so it shouldn't be difficult to give the lunchbox to her, or just leave it on her desk.

I should give it to her now, she looks very anxious, so Saegusa-senpai probably has some sort of important businesses somewhere, maybe this wasn't a good idea to come to her.

"Senpai, is there somewhere that you have to be? I don't want to be wasting your time.?"

"No…! I'm free right now, I was just going to get something from my shoe locker…, and then you just came, I'm probably looking a bit nervous now don't I…?"

"You look a bit, I don't want to be holding you here."

"Don't worry, you aren't, it's not that important anyway, I can get it later as well."

"I won't hold you for too long, I wanted to ask you something."

"What is it Gorichi-chan?"

"Have you seen Tohsaka-senpai at school today by any chance?"

"Tohsaka-san…? Yes, she is attending school today."

Yes, good to know that she is here. Partially, it's good that she is feeling better.

"She does seem rather off today though, as if something irritated her, I don't really know why she could be like that."

"Did she say how she was feeling? She didn't attend school yesterday because of an illness, so I'm worried that she doesn't get worse by being at school."

"I had asked her and she was feeling well, she looks in good shape as well, must've been a temporary one she had. It's quite rare for her to get ill anyway, so it's no surprise she beat it in a day."

"She does keep herself in good shape every time. I make sure of that from time to time, though she is independently active herself and keeps her health well."

"That's very kind of you to be looking out for her."

She doesn't really need that from me, but I still remind her to be active from, also making her lunch every morning so that she stays fed during the days.

"I haven't seen you much with her lately Gorichi… would it be okay if I addressed to you by your name? I don't like being so formal with friends."

"It wouldn't be respectful of me to address to you by your given name, but you can call me whatever you prefer Saegusa-senpai."

"I wouldn't mind it at all, but whatever you prefer, Matasa-chan."

I don't enjoy being this formal with friends as well, but it's only my part to do this as an under-classmen.

"Anyway, you haven't been with Tohsaka-san lately, and I've only been seeing you coming into school alone, adding in why she looks a bit angry today. I don't mean to pry, but did something happen between the two of you?"

"It's… complicated, Senpai. I am assuming that she is angry at me because of it, and I'm only giving Tohsaka-senpai a bit of space from me to think."

"It's unnatural to see her be angry at you, I refuse to believe that is the reason Matasa-chan. No one has ever seen the both of you fighting or being separated. I know it's not my place to get into, but wouldn't the best option would be to just make up with what had happened."

If she is angry at me, is there even a reason for that anymore? It may as well be for the better that she is, and it might even get worse later on. Even when Assassin had said the same, I don't know what to do anymore.

 **It doesn't seem possible for there to be another reason but this. You have enabled it, burned that into her, caused it yourself. Changing it will make it worse in many ways than that.**

"I wished I could, but it depends roughly on her. I don't want to make her more angry if it's my fault. Best to just give her space away from me. Either me or she will start to come to an agreement. Maybe you could ask her the reason though?"

"It isn't healthy for friends to be mad at each other, after such long time of being that. I'm butting in way too much in this, sorry."

"It's okay, I don't mind it. I'm happy that you are trying to help. Thank you."

I'm feeling a bit better know. Saegusa-senpai is such a nice person, caring for everyone. She's probably gained this sort of experience when taking care of her younger siblings.

"I'll ask her about it. Don't really expect her to say it, but I'll do it anyway."

"Thank you very much, Saegusa-senpai. I can't be more grateful to you. I got a little bit deeper and off from my original request, but would you mind giving this to her?"

"I was assuming this was for her. Keeping her regulated even while in this, you're absolutely an amazing friend to her Matasa-kun. I'm sure the both of you will make up eventually."

"If she doesn't decide to throw it away. No, she will if she hadn't had anything else, even with that, she wouldn't be able to resist the temptation. I know her."

"She is rather greedy with her lunch, not giving it to anyone. I can only imagine how great your cooking must be. I prepare my own lunch as well, and mostly for my younger siblings, sometimes I even make some for Maki-chan, since she has a hard time of even boiling water by herself."

"I would've expected Makidera-senpai to be able to make more healthy lunch sets since she's more of the athletic type, guess you can't really expect that much from her, heehee."

"I should maybe teach her how to at the least be able to cook rice, then I wouldn't have to be quicker with everything during the mornings. Luckily she sometimes has premade ones or buys lunch in the cafeteria."

"It's always best to have homemade lunch, not that I am complaining about the food being served in the cafeteria. It's been a while since I had anything there though, I remember how good the ramen noodles were the last time I had them there."

"Well it isn't bad to change things up from time to time."

"Of course it isn't. Hey, I could prepare anything better than the cafeteria has, it would take me years of training to even begin to be able to prepare something decent by myself."

"Maki-chan, I said I was going to be quick with it."

"Not quick enough it seems, also hey Mata-chan. So you were the one holding up Yukika for this long?"

"Good morning. I only had a request for Saegusa-senpai. Oh, I'm very sorry Senpai! I didn't mean to hold you for this long, here, please take it!"

I hadn't expected nor planned to keep her for this long, now I have done it for myself, well, at the least I got to talk with her again for a bit.

"Don't get so stressed about it, we weren't really doing anything anyway."

"We're not in a hurry at all, in fact, it's fun to talk with each other, I'll just get what I need after school, it can wait."

"Maybe we can talk as you go get it, there's still plenty of time before the break ends Senpai."

"There's no need for that Matasa-chan, I'll just get it later, it's no big deal, it can wait."

"So… what were the two of you talking about while I wasn't here, the both of you seemed rather fun when I took a peak."

"Maki-chan, you were spying on us?"

"I heard my name, so I figured you were laying something on me. Come out with it, what was it Mata-chan? We're you making fun of me for being slower than you?"

"That wasn't it Makidera-senpai, me and Saegusa-senpai were just talking about… lunchboxes."

"Lunchboxes? Was Yukika telling you of that one incident? I was in a hurry, and I knew I wasn't going to be having anything until the evening, I didn't have money at the time too. Yukika, how could you say that to Mata-chan?"

"I wasn't saying that. I even forgot about that until you had mentioned it Maki-chan."

"Don't lie to me Yukika! I know you were lying down all of my past failures and weaknesses to Mata-chan here. You wouldn't have mentioned my name and laughed after it if it wasn't saying something weak of me."

"Well I guess that it's partly true, but I didn't mean it in a bad way to talk of you Maki-chan! It just slipped out of my tongue while I was talking, and it definitely wasn't that, I swear it!"

"So you did lay something out to Mata-chan about me.

"It wasn't anything that bad, Matasa-chan, tell her."

"Um… Saegusa-senpai was only telling me about how she makes lunch for you, which I think is very nice of her to do. That's the truth, it's what she told me."

This came from nowhere, and she's overreacting about it, and about that incident, I can think of what it may be, but I won't.

"Is that all that she said? That's not really something to laugh about now is it Yukika?"

Saegusa-senpai seems even more overreacted then her, she looks so nervous about this, even though there's nothing that wrong going on here or it was, she just telling me with her eyes 'please don't say that, please don't say that, make something up quick!'.

"Ummm… well…"

"Actually, Yukika, did Mata-chan say anything about rejoining the track club?"

"…what…?"

"Mata-chan, so, did you reapply yourself to the track club yet? Yeah, sorry about asking this way too soon, but I wanna know when I'll be able to race you again."

Was I just that lucky or something? Anyway, I should answer her.

"Well… not yet, but I said that I would in a short time, maybe tomorrow if I can, I'd do it today, but I'm pretty busy after school."

"Okay then, yup, we'll be awaiting your return, Silver Fox of Fuyuki!"

"I would appreciate it if you would stop calling me that, Makidera-senpai."

"Humpf, don't even think about asking me that Mata-chan. You should be honoured to have that title."

I honestly don't enjoy it when being addressed like that most of the time…

"If I beat you in a race, will you then stop calling me that? I may as well just race you while still out of the club, it shouldn't be a problem, should it?"

"Tempting, but you only wished for that, first get admitted, and then we'll have that, only then I will agree to your terms."

"Guess I'll have to get admitted as soon as possible then."

Seems we've steered off of the previous subject, I'm glad for that, Saegusa-senpai seems like so as well. I sigh in relieve under my breath.

"What's so bad about being called that, I would feel happy if someone would give me a nickname as good as that."

"Yukika just seems fine already, you haven't prospered as much as Mata-chan has. Try beating at least one of us in a race and then maybe we'll start calling you something, for now, you're Yukika, without the sloth added into it."

"A sloth?!"

"Yeah, a sloth, you're slow, but cute at the same time."

"I'm not that slow Maki-chan! Am I?"

"…Would a tortoise be better?"

"That's even slower!"

"Doesn't it just bring too many problems, like this instance? That's the reason Senpai."

"I guess so, I guess I'll just stick to being the simple Yukika."

"Yup, the simple Yukika is the best name you could have."

"Just adding simple to that makes it sound like I'm not unique at all."

"I didn't mean it like that of course, oh well. Anyway, you better inform us right after you admission yourself, then we can have that race, will it be a deal?"

She sticks out her hand to me, well this is a sort of an unusual agreement since Makidera-senpai has been insisting quite a while about it, and I have said that I will agree to it… oh well, maybe she'll just stop pestering me about the obvious for what is to come. I take her hand in, she certainly has a strong grip.

"…!Such cold hands…!"

"Oh, sorry, I am rather cold blooded I'd say, they're like that most of the time."

Since of my cold resistance, I do have a tendency of not really noticing things like that, though a lot of people other than myself are like this as well, just not as prone to be completely oblivious to the fact that their skin is cold. I try to rub my hand together to generate at least a bit of heat in them.

"That's not really something to be apologising for."

"I know, it was just natural of me. At least we have that agreement settled, maybe we can all race once that takes part, even Himuro-senpai could be in it. Who knows? Maybe she has improved a lot."

"She could only run a few meters before having to stop to catch her breath."

"Maki!"

"I'm just kidding Yukika, you're going to have a chance to at least redeem yourself then."

"I don't really care who wins it actually, as long as it stays as a workout, and we can all have it be again, like the old times."

"I missed those, we're honestly glad that you decided on coming back."

"Heh, wouldn't I ruin your trio if I were to come back?"

"We don't mind, a new member would be the best thing to happen, then we would be the Quartet of the Track club, like the Four Musketeers, but of the Track Club."

"Nor would we have rapiers."

"Ehhh running around with rapiers would be rather dangerous."

"Obviously. Anyway, I should get this to Tohsaka-san before the bell rings, so that she wouldn't have to wait until after classes to have it."

"What's that?"

"Matasa-chan prepared her lunch for her, though…"

"Oh, Tohsaka seems really pissed right now for some reason, good luck giving it to her Yukika."

"I'm sure when you give it to her she'll calm down, or at least I hope so, it's mine after all."

"You had to remind me of that Maki-chan, can't you give it to her?"

"I'm not gonna go near her, I'll provide moral support three meters away, and make sure that she doesn't go freak on you."

"Is Tohsaka-senpai really that angry?"

"She looks more irritated than she is usually, though I haven't really had the guts to speak to her. Wonder what it could be, maybe she got stud up or something."

"It's probably because of me…"

"You stud her up Mata-chan, whoah, I didn't even think that your relationship could exceed to that, let alone stand her up."

"It's not that at all!"

"Oh, well, it isn't really my job to butt into it, unlike Yukika here."

"Hey, I don't enjoy butting into other people's privacy!"

"Anyway, we should already get this to the Ice Queen before she gets more fierce for not getting her lunch before classes, see you maybe later Fox."

"Yes Matasa-chan, see you next time."

The both walk away and into the classroom at the end of the hall.

Was kind of missing the normal trio without Himuro-senpai, but it's nice to see the two act as such natural friends by themselves, they're honestly such fun people to talk to.

So, Tohsaka-senpai is angry for some reason. It could just be because of me, I haven't spoken to her in almost two days, she might as well be wondering what had actually happened to me to just stop visiting her.

I don't think that I am completely ready to talk to her yet, I'm honestly… a bit scared because of that, I know how she can be, and I'm not only terrified because of that, I don't want it to get worse, I don't want it to go worse for her.

I know what Assassin told me to do, I know that she wants me to start being sociable with them again. I'm honestly confused, and scared for it, and now that I've avoiding her, it may just go wrong again. Maybe if I just wait enough, possibly and hopefully just another day will be needed, then I will have the courage to be able to speak to her again. I just talked with Saegusa-senpai and Makidera-senpai just know, and it helped, this is just good for me, raising my moral and confidence.

I have to do it for Assassin, and start having and try on a normal life like before I had summoned her. She wants me to do it, so I have to try whatever I can to do it. I guess I'll even feel more morale for myself if I start doing this, be more positive about, despite me feeling that there isn't really much left of it.

I'm just thinking of the inevitable outcome that will befall me eventually, and if the decisions that I have made in the past few days have been the right ones. It hurt me so much that I did them, and I don't even know if they're right or wrong, I'm risking it, I'm risking everyone for my…

 **Selfishness.**

 **It's only natural for one to be like this, not being able to distinguish a good decision from a bad one, there will always be a risk in taking one, and there is never telling if both of them will actually be bad or good. It's an unavoidable part to experience, and choosing the bad… it will just ruin you at the end.**

Am I already to far into this? Will me even trying to correct it change the outcome in any way? Will it be worth it? I have no idea even of that. It's unplanned, it's stupid of me, utterly foolish, I didn't think enough through, I'm a pure idiot who only ruined everything for himself and others!

 **Anything can happen, anything can change, any action can change the outcome for the better or worse, as long is thee act, thee can change the result of it.**

I can only give myself time to do it, I'm too much of a weakling to do it now anyway, nor do I have the time for it now, nor the bravery, nor the wish to… that's false… I want to.

I don't even think I would be able to do it with Emiya-senpai. I failed Assassin for today, hopefully she'll give me another chance tomorrow. I don't even have an idea of how to explain my failure…

She would be more interested in the Bounded Field around the school if I told her about it, no, she would be obsessed about it, the first clue of our enemy, who is someone in the school.

Dang it, I got a bit caught up with Saegusa-senpai I hadn't thought about it too much. At the least the conversation we had was rather nice to have, and… it would be better to check it out after classes, once most have exited the building, so that it would be much safer. I need to investigate it.

* * *

For once I had actually wished Assassin had come with me. Didn't expect to miss her shady attitude on others, at least it adds humour to my dull times here, since today just seemed to be one of those old, dull and nothing to give days.

But if I had, my plans for her surprise would be spoiled. Oh well, I'm not even done with here yet.

It only took around ten minutes for my classroom to disperse, and I'm the only one who is left. I packed my belongings much slower then the others, also pushed some seats better into the desks and cleaned the chalkboard. The club activities should be in order outside and in the assigned rooms, so the school isn't completely empty, but it's good enough.

I take a peak through the corner of the doors and into the hall to check for any left students, and at least this floor seems to be empty of juniors. I'll have to keep a lookout for anyone though just in case.

To the rooftop I go.

* * *

No other students encountered on my way here fortunately, nor any on the rooftop, luckily the doors to access it were unlocked.

So I was able to sense two points of the activated sigils – one being in the student council room and another one here. I could understand the rooftop, but the Student Council room is a very risky place to set it in.

I wished I could lock the door so that I wouldn't get any unexpected guests while I am acting on the problem at hand, maybe I could block it with something…

Doesn't seem like there is anything I could use here. Oh well, I'll just have to act quickly about it before that may happen.

Hmm, so it's here, just on the ground, not even anywhere where it would be a bit more secluded. Well it's invincible to the naked eye anyway, but at least the perpetrator could have hidden it better.

They didn't bother too much of making it more hard to find – leaving it out at the open, not even concentrating the exhausted magical energy around it, you could feel it surging from the first floor. They just set it here, enabled its concealment and left it to do its magic. How unprepared of them.

This was expected from the start. The Bounded Field's purpose is to gather magical energy from any life form that comes into its affected zone. I can only think that it would be used to strengthen their Servant's abilities. Going to such manners of enforcing their victory, they're absolutely merciless about it, and probably desperate.

If there isn't anything done about it, it will activate in a few days, enhancing its effects more. It would kill anyone left in it for too long, especially normal human beings. I'm fortunate that the magus that set this was careless about it.

This Sigil is quite of high magecraft, and the amount of mana it's exceeding is abundant. Only a Servant could be able to accomplish this feat.

So a Servant is the perpetrator of the Bounded Field, probably under their Master's orders. I can presume their both ruthless and thirsty for more power, trying to make their odds as high as possible.

… Can't seem to find any other effects that it is causing, besides the barrier around the school, though it may… no, that's its one purpose – the Bounded field. It's still at its peak of activation, so it was only put recently by the perpetrator.

Hmm, maybe if I examine it a bit more, I might actually find out the class of the Servant that had established it, but is it good risking my time here and being caught…? Just a minute, I need to focus on this a bit more.

Not working at all. Despite not secluding it more, they did go through a lot to hide its properties of the one who casted it, but I can only tell that the amount of magical energy it's excluding is truly big, so they must have a high mana capacity, could possibly be Caster.

The sigil itself is of a rather interesting design, it may actually give me a clue of the Servant's identity. I can't tell where it exactly originated from, the design is rather similar to…

I may have seen this during my studies in Greek Mythology, I may be wrong though, can't exactly remember all the details, but it's similar. I should look into the books later, maybe I'll find out the Servant's identity, if I do that, we have such a good starting point here. Thank you careless one who did this I guess.

Maybe I should draw this for a reference, so that I wouldn't forget how it looks like. I wouldn't want to leave a good chance of finding out the identity of the Servant while it's being presented right in front of me. I'll just sketch it a little , especially these weird markings, they should have some kind of meaning to them.

That should be enough. Nothing more I can examine it about, I've looked at everything I am able to, so I should start getting rid of it.

Normally it's quite difficult on cancelling a Bounded Field without the one who casted it, but since it was formed from these sigils, I'll be able to take it down. Fortunately I took most of my magic studies in Sigils and Crests, time well spent, without that knowledge you wouldn't be able to cancel it, but I'll need to erase both sigils, and quick before any other ones are established.

And… Done! It has disappeared from the surface, and I can't feel its excluded magical energy anymore, and I can also feel the Bounded Field weakening. The location of the other one is in the Student Council Room, or at least I think it is, I felt a surge of magical energy coming from there as I passed through it one time, so it should be there.

… The trio seems to be having their regular club activities. Makidera-senpai is not wasting any time, continuing running at full speed around the course, while Himuro-senpai and Saegusa-senpai seem to be chatting with each other.

I miss those times in the Track club, I used to have so much fun spending time there, it was actually the most fun club that I was attending at the time, but unfortunately, because of my pushed studies and other tries at after-school activities, I had to resign from it for some time.

Maybe I could have one day, one after-school session with the trio before anything more serious happens, having that nice time with them once more, before…

Staying here was rather clumsy of me, the two noticed me on the rooftop and are giving me a wave, I should do the same to act less suspicious.

* * *

The inside of the school is surprisingly quite, as if it's abandoned, well it may as well be - no human in sight from the looks of it.

Still, I should try moving as quick as possible, I will be so unlucky if there are people in the student council room, I have to get there and erase the sigil, or it may only get worse. I'll pick up my pace, the stairs.

"Hey, watch where the hell you are going!"

Maybe running on the stairs wasn't that good of an idea, should've thought that before I started plummeting of the final step onto the ground, right next to an upper-classmen. Luckily I landed on my arms, still a bit irritated from the rubbing on the dirty floor, I'll need to clean these out later.

"I'm very sorry, I was in a bit of a hurry… Oh, hello there Matou-senpai."

Been a while since I've seen him, especially now when he seems quite irritated with the circumstances.

"You are lucky you didn't ruin my uniform Gorichi. Next time look where you are running."

"I'm sorry Senpai, I'll try to be more careful next time."

"Right… anyway…"

"Oh, before you leave, could I ask you something?"

He turned around with a quite irritated look, but oh well, I'll ask him anyway.

"How has Sakura-san been doing?"

"Why do you want to know about that dunce?"

"That's a bit of a cruel way to talk about your younger sister Senpai."

"Yeah, well it's the truth, she's a total dunce who deserves nobody's attention."

"…Senpai, is there something that you are angry about? If it was me, I guess I'll just apologise again."

"Stop looking at me like that, and stop apologising! If you want to know how she has been doing, why don't you ask her yourself?"

"…Well, I just had the chance to talk with you, so I decided to ask you about her, if it is fine with you, I won't waste your time if you aren't feeling on telling me."

"Ask her about it Gorichi, I don't have the time to deal with you, go to the archery dojo if you want to talk to her, I'll at least tell you that she is there."

At least he was kinder than he usually is to me. I do try to avoid talking with Matou-senpai, but I was eager to know when meeting him on how Sakura-san has been doing at school.

His words were rather harsh to Sakura-san, if he talks like that about her with others, especially someone like me, who he isn't that much acquainted with, then how does he badmouth about her to other people? Or actually, does he even speak that roughly to Sakura herself?

I used to help her with homework and her studies before, since we were in the same year, and had a shared class and project to do once, I had to help quite a bit with her. She hadn't been asking for any help from me, so I am presuming that she is doing just well, unfortunately her older brother couldn't tell me exactly about her.

… I should really talk to Sakura-san sometime, I want to know how she is actually doing academically wise, though I don't have much doubt about her on that, more importantly, is she even doing well at home, I'm… worried, even though we are only practically close to just classmates, I couldn't really…

Is it… my place to be in? I… It isn't my place to barge into their domestic problems, but…

I'll have to ask her sometime about how she is doing.

* * *

Out of all the times the Student Council staff decides to be absent, they choose this time. I'm lucky to come here at this time then, that accidental fall must've boosted karma for me, but that's probably not the case, I could imagine it being that though.

The door was unlocked as I came in, and it is locked when it is not in use, so that could mean the staff went out for a short bit and will be returning soon. I have to be quick with this, I wouldn't know how to explain myself if I was caught here.

The sigil is in this room, that's pretty obvious to sense, the magical energy around here is lingering on my skin, I feel cold air.

Yes, it is in here. They took in the idea of securing it much better here than on the rooftop, probably because this room is occupied most of the time. Now putting this behind the books in the bookshelf would be quite biased, you wouldn't know if someone were to take them out or not, even thought this sigil is too invisible to the naked eye, it would be sensible to magi like myself, more or so. There are marks of dust on these books, so I can only presume they weren't used much, meaning that they wouldn't catch the attention of other's.

But still. If it were me to be the perpetrator, I would made it as secure as possible, possibly putting the sigil behind the bookshelf itself, or someone where no one would ever even think of moving.

From what I can tell, this Master didn't think their plans through. They're not careful with their actions, these kind of actions need precision and a good think through before committing to it, and it's pretty obvious that they just set these up mindlessly. At the least, they tried.

If they keep up at this, they will eventually reveal their position and identity through their carelessness, which will be in my favour. Perhaps they will be easily persuaded into ceasing their actions with a bit of intimidation, which I would easily result to.

They have put everyone in the school in harms way of their own greed, only better their chances, which wouldn't even matter much if they weren't a good magus to begin with, nor would their Servant be. I couldn't tell on what level of skill they are, but if they're this careless, they can only be a first-rate magus.

If they won't abide to my proposal, I will have to let Assassin result to her methods then, she's probably better at it than me anyway, hopefully she won't result to bigger violence than it has to be, I wouldn't want the both of use staining our hands, or at the least as little as possible. She would begin with violence on her own if I wasn't to tell her not to, she doesn't really seem like the reasonable type, more of a… someone that would just end the cause of it with one swoop type of woman.

I myself would like to have as little casualties as possible, but if violence was the only answer, then…

 **End the perpetrator and end their ruthless pathetic actions for strength, such trash need no existence in the world in which they are found. Sinful beings will only meet their ends through their selfish deeds in the afterlife.**

I'll just result to whatever is needed to be in when it actually happens, I can only hope they'll be cooperative, I have Assassin on my side anyway – the presumed interrogator, she'll knock the bricks out of them and they'll have to succumb to her, if not… I'll just let her deal with the problem in her own way. Anyway, I have to get rid of this and stop wasting my time here thinking on the unnecessary. I'll get caught in the middle of it if I stay here for any longer.

This is the last sigil I was able to sense in the school, I'm quite close to it, and this one is exhausting even more mana than the other one. It must've been put here before that one on the rooftop was. Because of this magical energy, my abilities to sense other sources is somewhat obscured, and in this time, another one could possibly be applied somewhere else, and then I'll have to deal with that one, and if that's the case, then the one who put these up is still in the school area.

Their Servant is the one putting these up, I… don't know if I could face them alone without Assassin, I have no idea what they would be capable of doing to me if I faced them asking about these. I'll maybe just stake them out, at least then I'll know who they are and won't have to meet with them, hopefully.

If this is the only and final sigil, I can destroy the field itself and free the school from its binds, and the malignant air around here would be finally gone, or at least until they put up another one.

They will know that someone has found out about their actions, and will only try at finding out who demolished them, basically, they will start looking for me. They won't stop putting these until I have dealt with them myself, but I can only disable them for a time being, maybe I can create a bounded field around the school with no caused effects that would not allow the activation of other fields around the school, though preparing that would take a rather long time to do.

This is taking a bit longer to take down than the other one, putting in all of this in demolishing it is more time consuming than erasing it, but with only my knowledge…

It's done.

In an instant, the air around me became clearer. I feel less magical energy than before, of course there still is some, but not as much as before. With that as well, I am not able detect any other sigils in the plot of the school, meaning this was the only one left.

Now to leave the area before they come and find me here.

There wasn't really anywhere that I would be able to steak the perpetrator out unfortunately, I would look suspicious just being anywhere around the area. My classroom seems to be the safest place right now.

I maybe could've hidden somewhere inside the Student Council room, but I didn't have much time to think of a place so I had rushed to leave instead. Well fortunately for me, I wasn't caught by them. If Assassin was here with me, I wouldn't worry as much. I'll have to rethink about having her accompany me to school, it's too dangerous for me to be here without her.

But we finally got it, a lead so unexpectedly, a Master being someone in the school, and we didn't even have to do anything. And this Master is posing a deadly problem to the whole school, we have to deal with them as soon as possible. If the Bounded Field is activated, it will only be a matter of time before everyone perishes. They'll most likely go with putting a few more sigils around the school to ensure that their plans succeed, so I'll have to be looking for them everyday to ensure that that doesn't happen, and possibly find a way to restrict them from continuing it, most likely it will lead to me meeting them.

But it's a bit difficult to take in. Another Master in my own school? And with this kind of grim plan to strengthen their Servant? I shouldn't start underestimating anyone from now on, it's a war, with everyone trying to ensure their chances at winning by any means necessary, fortunately I'm not like those ones, all I want is to prosper and not have anyone be hurt in the process of it… if possible.

Yes, dealing with them in haste is our number one priority, to ensure the safety of this school, I will find out the identity of the magus and face them.

Now, I actually am really eager to report to Assassin of today's findings. She will definitely be interested in them…

I could actually tell her right now, if we are able to communicate through such a long distance between each other… No, she'll probably be worried about me and come here without my approval to ensure my safety. Then I won't be able to do that "surprise" I have in mind for her. It will be spoiled.

I'll be at most carefulness, trying not to attract anyone's attention for today, I should be safe then, nothing should happen. Yes, that sounds like the appropriate plan that will be beneficial for me.

Now then, I should get going. Staying here won't have me accomplish anything. Hopefully I don't run right into someone's personal space like I did some moments ago.

Darn, I should clean my hands. I can't have my day prosper without regularly maintained hand hygiene, I must have clean palms at every time.

* * *

Solitude of the Mind, the title I give to the one place that I can feel at peace, despite not looking at my current situation, before it was so nice, and it's still nice now, but I'm working rather hard here, fortunately there was no one around when I had come in, so I did not need to worry about ensuring my works to be a secret from anyone.

I've been more composed about this, but my head hurts a bit. I think I went through 10 or so books about Greek mythology, mixed in with classical literature that maybe could lead me to somewhere, but no where that I could find even a similar symbol, or even a part of it, that could relate to the sigils I found. Fortunately students are allowed to make some sorts of comfort inside the library, adorning us with a kettle for our needs. Good that I decided to save on some of those tea leaves I had in my bento box.

With this sort of coincidence, I can practically serve myself wherever I want whenever I want to. What an absolutely astonishing coincidence.

But so, even rechecking the books a second time wasn't sufficient enough, and the last couple of hours of researching have been for nought. If they didn't have anything that could title the symbols on the sigils that I had found, then I doubt they are written in any historical book at all. They were established by a Servant after all, so I guess I can't presume books can travel that much into the past.

And unfortunately for me, I hadn't brought my own world history books with me today since I hadn't a class for it on this day, and I couldn't find a copy of it in the library.

There has to be something in there if it gave me the clue of this. I'll only get to know about once I return home though.

Would I actually be up for maybe looking at the bookcases again? It's quite a big library, so the books I found were only a small part of everything about Greek mythology located here. Maybe I should make a quick thorough search around again, there should be a couple of them that I had missed…

I've never been so tensed up with work in a while - searching through books, looking for one specific thing… I don't even know for what I am actually looking, a lead? A certain figure that could lead me to the identities of my enemies, is taking this matter this soon a good thing?

I'm just a bit stressed, I've been going through the unexpected today, putting me a bit near the edge, it's been going for a few days actually, so many things happening at the same time, and I am trying to take them all in. Okay, taking a couple of deep breaths, I need to take a break from this, at least for a few minutes, maybe to think and process things through… no, let me have a rest for myself, I'll get back to it after that. A couple of breaths should be enough, I'm in my solitude place after all.

A bit of relief finally, combining bits of sips is thankfully making it better. This is only mandatory to do during researching time, or I will strain myself out, that won't be good at all.

Now that I recall, I did have similar incidents like these in the past, even more stressful ones in fact, which now would only be a cake walk for me.

Mixing in my elementary school studies with magic lessons by myself, I was utterly engulfed in binds of stress during the time, I remember studying, researching and training for countless hours throughout the days, taking more rests than now though, being rather weak and young physically back then. Thankfully I have grown out of that phase now, I'm older and more knowledgeable about every concept of things, even though there is still much for me to learn, mostly about things not relating to magecraft.

I was quite interested in the concept of magic at the time, and never got a chance to be taught about it before that, my peer probably wanted me to age a bit before I started getting into the concept of magecraft, despite it being best to start it off from the youngest age possible.

I studied in anything that I thought that would be good for a novice like myself, starting of with basic stuff like alchemy and Sigil craft. After studying those I started to get to more serious branches like incantations and healing magic. Incantations were such a bother, but I got the basics of them and then stopped. Maybe I'll resume in them sometime. Basically, I learned everything possible bit by bit, it was hard, but at the least I have become more experienced.

I don't regret any of it, since it was only mandatory for me to learn everything, even though it was by myself, I'm quite fortunate to be able on learning those on my own actually, self-teaching might sometimes come out better than having a superior guiding you through the way. I do wish I had someone like that, it would've made it a bit easier, and I probably could've learnt much more throughout the years.

Never did it happen. I had to stand on my own two feet and do it by myself. My life before was always the same, just ongoing chains of the same thing every single day, and now I have found myself here, doing practically the same. At least I have a much better reason for doing it, even though I don't know if I'll even be able to do anything, and if it will be worth for that.

What am I doing right now, just sitting in the school library, researching, basically something that any normal student like myself would do, but it's the reason that it is different, something that isn't normal – trying to find out the identity of my enemies through historical books, it doesn't sound that weird, but the context of it is truly unusual. I don't expect to find anything here, and the longer I sit here, the more I lose hope…

Hope that I don't even have anymore… Hope that I lost in a forgotten time. No, I've been given some, a little bit by Assassin, she's been so supportive, but I feel as if I lost it already. I'm truly careless of it, losing such a precious thing for a human being, it's stupid and pathetic to do for the reasons that I have.

That lost hope has made me think about it again.

I mostly contemplate about the unexpected that may befall upon me, it's true. I am not looking into my future anymore, because I can't see it there, only a blank space of emptiness with nothing in it. In the end, whenever it may be, there won't be anything there, nothing new, nothing old, just nothing.

Wishing for it? I think it's useless, the inevitable is awaiting me to succumb to it, and if I don't, I feel as if it will be worse.

 **A black space is still a concept. It is a mystery, Darkness can contain anything in itself, awaiting its release from its dark bindings that withhold it. It's an unexpected matter that will befall on you once you are able to. The end of life is only similar, even the dark space holds something within itself, May it bring either good or bad intentions for the one befalling it.**

…I… I expect my befalling to bring me harmony, but in the end, I get nothing from it. I only see the peace of my death. The joyous…

I already said to myself that I wouldn't think like this. Why…? Why am I so wanting of it? For myself, I've never been happy.

I don't deserve to think like that. I just don't. I'm prohibiting it. I never deserved it. I will never deserve to feel it anyway. That's the one feeling I am not allowed to have for myself.

I… should think about something else anyway. I'm almost finished drinking anyway. I need my morale back if I want to be able to accomplish anything while I am still here.

I don't I'll be able to speak to Senpai today, or any other day. I'm too weak to do it, morally I'm a weakling. I've already failed Assassin by not doing anything, by not even trying.

I'm just too scared to do anything, which proves that I'm only but a weakling, add to that, a selfish one who only cares about themselves. I was given my one chance yesterday, and I decided not to take it because of that, and now, I am forsaken with my selfishness, by myself, in my own mistakes, with only one person trying their best to support me, make me feel better about myself, and I am also failing them by not being able to comprehend it. Why do you care about me so much, Assassin?

Remembering parts of that past, those small fragments of a past time in which I had lived, they were so important, I couldn't… I couldn't give them away for anything, they were more valuable than anything I had really, part of it at least. I was only experiencing so much, and I couldn't think about anything anymore, I was a shut off machine without emotions, I lost faith in everything back then.

Not wanting to be sociable with anyone. Not wanting to properly take care of myself with required needs. Not wanting to feel the life around me anymore. Death was only thing attached to me, only to me, persuading me to join it. I couldn't resist it anymore. You would think I would do something drastic, but that's the point, I didn't do anything, I was resisting by not doing anything at all, and there were times… when I just wanted to hold those hands of it, so that it could take me away, someplace better than the world I was living in.

Despair, violence, grief, depression – all of them replaced the small bit of happiness that I felt, they broke me, I couldn't feel anything anymore. I was a broken down machine, worthless to the eye, I had no worth at all. The ones I cared about met their untimely death and I broke down into a rotten waste of flesh, my reasons to resist were all gone.

Tohsaka-senpai tried to help me, everyone I knew tried to help me, but I felt a lot of things, while also nothing, it's weird. I felt as if I didn't deserve it anymore. It was hopeless of them to put in so much effort. They just didn't stop doing it, I had become a burden, even more than I was before, and to that, I resulted to avoid them as much as possible.

I'd go anywhere that I could, to any place that wouldn't have people so caring for me waiting for me there, to be alone in my solitude of depression, to stray away from the help that was being provided to me. I had nothing to feel after that, seclusion was the only thing that I could accomplish. Sleeping outside was part of it as well. I'd go anywhere to be alone.

Outcasting myself… it seemed like the only thing I was able to do at the time, not wanting to be a burden for others. Hehe… doing such would only become worse obviously, I didn't even look at the outcome of it, similar situation like now I guess, but yes, from that moment on, it became so much worse, but as long as I was able to not bring a burden to others, it was a small sacrifice to make, after all, I'm a human tool, no, I didn't even deserve to be called like that at the time, just a tool, an instrument used to make the lives of other people better, I had no right to think for myself… I HAVE no right to think for myself.

Despite that, I still continued going to school. Everyone there had their eyes on me, as if they are watching a walking carcass that shouldn't be there, at least that's what I presumed, I looked out of place, I just came there and out gone as soon as it was over, back to my daily routine of secluding myself and being miserable until the next day when I repeat the process again.

Some of those eyes… were more interested in me than others. My pathetic presence would interest them, seeing such a mess of myself, probably thinking it was a perfect opportunity to use it for their own wishes, satisfy their needs.

They knew I wouldn't do anything. They could do with me as they pleased and I wouldn't say a word. It turned into such a twisted outcome. I found a reason for my existence, to be used for other people's needs, no matter what kind of needs they were. I felt both an unusual emotion, something that made me feel alive, no, it was a contrast between wanting to die, and a feeling of living, and I only could think that it was the reason for why I was still alive at the time, after some attempts of ending it myself, eventually coming to the conclusion that I don't deserve to do it myself.

It was so twisted, but I was satisfied with the sadness that I had succumbed to as they laid out their problems and held in anger on me, they only pointed out what a pathetic excuse for a living being I was, though I wasn't completely alive, it was like a contrast between both life and death, I couldn't tell anymore. All I knew is that what was left of me could've been used for the needs of others, and I was satisfied with the thought, that my accidental existence could be recycled.

An unending cycle of suffering befell. It lasted for a long time, some of those days thankfully I don't even remember, but basically every single day, I was left with bruises in the cold by myself, contemplating on why do I even walk on this Earth anymore. The answer to that is to suffer until I finally succumb to the temptation and commit a **sin.**

 **Resistance to the temptation of it, of feeling that reason within one's life was absent, if it was only futile, then death would be salvation in one's eyes. You wanted to seek salvation, and sought in violence and pain instead of succumbing to it… Committing a sin is only a small fortune to accomplish for salvation from one's despair.**

Always waiting in one spot, waiting for it to just come and go and come back the next day. The life of a toy with only the reason of living being to be broken completely by others, to watch it's accidental life being destroyed, to be punished for existing… . And I had only wanted to find a replacement for what I had, and eventually I had found it, my own cycle of suffering that follows me to this day, though so partly.

I could've not even got used to them, but fortunately I did, it hurt less, and with every passing day, I would only come to the conclusion that this was my reason that I was still alive back then. To be beaten for living. It was God's Judgement on me, and I deserved it,

And then it happened, something that would befall upon me and change my life from there on out had occurred.

It was like any other day. I was experiencing my daily beating from the other children at my school. Getting kicks and punches onto the surface of my skin, leaving scars and bruises, they probably wanted me to die already, everyday they got angrier, and with the fuelling anger it fuelled their strengths that they had unleashed upon me. They were only about to end me that time, with one of them bringing a big rock to me. With one drop to my head, I would've been dead.

Nobody would've even missed me, I was only a useless human being on which they could lay out their needs and anger, I didn't know much about them, other that they seeked pleasure from hurting others, and despite that, they just grew more angrily every single day. I never resisted them, they knew I wouldn't try anything, they knew I wouldn't stop them from killing me. Thinking, that if they had seen me as the manifestation of their problems, and that they would finally kill me, they would finally achieve their salvation. I think we all thought the same, me and the three others who were planning on making me their problems personified and ending it.

They already had the rock above my head while I was laying helpless on the ground, without even having a reason to fight them back. I could see it in their eyes that they wanted to end it with me, they were craving on finally seeing me with my head bashed into the ground under a big stone, to finally see their problems dead. I thought that it would finally end for me, until it happened.

I didn't even know where they came from at the time. It's as if they came out of thin air, fallen from the sky, not that dramatic, but there was someone else during the time of my upcoming death.

I didn't move at all. The only thing that I was able too look at is the object being held above my head, about to fall on me and end everything. My brain couldn't process the words that I heard, but the only thing that I was able to hear was a 'stop'.

Moments after that, death exited. They were gone, and I could only see the evening sky above me. Just the sky, it was beautiful, I did never expect to finally see it again without the children beating me. I was still helpless on the ground, sad that I didn't meet my end, for my suffering to finally end, but happy to see the sky above me. I kind of even hoped that while they were beating me, I had my skin punctured and couldn't feel as I was bleeding out, though I had made up a quite large tolerance to pain by then, and sadly, I couldn't bleed out while watching at the most beautiful spectacle that I could have. I lied there for moments, admiring the view before me, but then it was obstructed by the one who I would presume was the one who prevented my upcoming execution.

They were trying to say something to me, but I couldn't hear them. I didn't know who they were, they were a complete stranger who had apparently came from no where. I could only keep looking at the sky trying to avoid eye contact with them. I didn't want to pass up the moment that I had, I wanted to die there, peacefully at least, then it would've been accomplished – my own wish and the one's who beat me wish. I was staring lifelessly into the yellow sky for moment ignoring them, they probably were thinking that I had actually died. They continued moving me, it hurt when they touched my bruised skin a little, but I couldn't feel as if I had any punctures one the surface of my body. I wasn't going to die. Obviously they were worried about me, but they were making me put another burden on them, a total stranger, and an unnecessary one at that. I couldn't help it.

"Why?"

I asked them that. Their expression changed instantly. Was it unexpected to hear something like that from someone who was about to die? Someone who only wanted to die at the time.

"Leave me…"

I still kept on staring into the void above me, but after I asked them, they stopped doing anything. They only had an expression of confusion and fear in their eyes, but it was only for some moments. Eventually they went out of my field of vision, and I could only presume that they had listened to me and left. I was finally alone. I felt the cycle had been broken, but it felt good. It was better staring out into the sky above me than anything else at the time. I felt… satisfied in it, and it didn't hurt me, probably because I hadn't moved at all.

Eventually the sky was masked with a layer of blackness. The beautiful view before me had changed into something different. Don't get me wrong it was quite nice to look at as well, but around that time I should've went to find somewhere to spend the night. I could've just staid there as well, but since I knew I wasn't about to die, I didn't want to go to school in the morning with dirty clothes and untreated injuries. It was time for me to leave for the day.

I was glad that it was for once different, but also disappointed that I didn't die. I was so expected of it, yet it was ruined for me by one someone that had interrupted. Hopefully it could be executed the next day, and this time with it not being interrupted by a stranger.

It was quiet. I didn't exactly know what time it was at the moment, but not too late. I wished I was alone again at the time, but unfortunately for me, it was ruined.

I had presumed that they had vacated the area and actually listened to me, left me alone in my own being. But no, they were sitting there, for hours while I was laying on the ground minding my own weird business. I couldn't do much, and accidentally made I contact with them.

Couldn't recognize them at all. Great, I made myself a burden for a total stranger this time. My peacefulness ruined for me, and I felt the most guilty I could ever feel. For hours they sat next to me, and I don't even know for what reason they had done that.

But one thing caught my certain attention during the time. Everyone had looked so worried about me before, making me want to seclude from them and not make myself of a burden for them. I don't want to have others be wasted on me, I just don't want that. Don't rely only on me. But them… I could see that they looked relieved, that I wasn't brain dead and had actually stood up from the filth.

They looked glad for me. I didn't know why. Why were they relieved, they shouldn't have cared at all for me, what were they even thinking…? It wasn't their problem to begin with, and they decided to intervene in it, in the process, ruining this for me.

I didn't know what to say to them at all. I felt nothing as usual during the time. After all, they technically saved me back there, and they put their efforts into it. I should've just shown my gratitude for their actions, despite me being not wanting of them.

"Thank you."

After that, it only took a few steps for me to fall face onto the dirty ground. My legs wouldn't be able to support themselves. It didn't hurt, but I guess they were just too fatigued to support my weight. The stranger immediately rushed to my side, trying to help me up from the ground, part of me didn't, and they managed to sit me up.

"Please, I don't need your help anymore. I'll be fine on my own."

That was a lie from me. I knew I wouldn't be able to support myself, I'd probably just drag myself somewhere where I could rest, somewhere where I could spend the night again.

"You won't be. If you looked at the mirror you would know it yourself. Let me help you, I'll help you get home. Where do you live?"

I didn't say anything to them. I was only making myself more of a bother for somebody else, and I didn't want that to be it, besides, then they would take me to somewhere that I wouldn't want to be. I tried ignoring them, didn't assume that they would leave if I asked them, so I hoped that they just would've went away. We sat there for minutes, and they were still there, sitting next to me. I thought about trying to stand up and possibly run from them, but knew that I wouldn't get far. I was stuck in a predicament.

"You know, your parents are probably worried about you being out this late, mine are probably the same."

Parents. That word pulled a trigger in me the moment it left their mouth, but that trigger had no effect afterwards, I only got a glimpse of the past that I once had - a gone past.

"I have no one like that anymore…."

It was probably a mistake of me telling something like that to them. It would've lead to a whole lot of assumptions that would made the situation worse, but it didn't.

"Oh… Then that's something similar about the both of us."

My attention had come up to them, despite what they had said.

"You said that your parents were worried about you."

"Yeah, my stepdad probably is, but he'll understand once I tell him about what I was doing."

A stepfather. They were different from me then, they still had someone that they could count on and look up to… I didn't have someone like that… anymore really.

"You should go back to them, just… leave me be. Please, you don't need to help me anymore, I don't want to be a bother to you."

"You don't have anywhere to go, don't you…?"

"I do, it's just… it isn't your problem, I don't want to be a problem to others. I don't want to go back. I want to be here."

Going back to the Tohsaka residence would've made it more problematic, especially in the state in which I was. Tohsaka-senpai would've gotten a heart attack seeing me in such a manner that I was in. I had to stay away, until I could've…

"Well, you honestly are a problem to me right now. I want to go home, but I couldn't just leave you out here, I wouldn't be able to sleep at night, and I wouldn't get any sleep for school tomorrow."

It hit me then, the realization of it.

I had run away from the Tohsaka residence after not taking in anyone's help, thinking that I was only an unnecessary problem to them, eventually turning myself into one for the kids from my pre-school, and now… to a total stranger, who had… saved me.

I couldn't help it anymore, my stupidity just obscured the true cause of what I was doing, and I was only making it worse for everyone, just because I thought of some stupid assumption. I started crying, I hadn't cried for so long, I never really cried before, but I did, I finally had an emotion back, something that I could feel, something that would make me a human again. While the boy in front of me, the one who made me realize it, just sat in front of me and started patting me on the head, smiling. Someone was finally glad for me, even though I didn't even know who they were at all.

"It's all right. Cry out as much as you want. I won't leave you alone here."

I tried to stop myself, but the only thing that I could've thought of how I made people worried about me. My eyes had become swollen by then, and eventually I ran out of tears to cry out, realising the problem.

"Thank you… you made me realise something, a mistake that I had made, something that was hurting others."

"Hey, you were the one being hurt there. I couldn't think of what you needed to say to them to make them so angry at you like that. It didn't look like normal bullying at all, anyway, those kids were insane, luckily I came here just in time. "

I didn't really know what it made it be, but I had a feeling of calmness, being next to them, perhaps it was that… that they saved me, they made me realise my mistake, and with that, granted me a chance to fix them, granted me another retry in the world.

"Well, staying out here won't do you any good, especially in that condition. Can you stand up?"

My knees were able to stand me up, but only for a brief moment before plummeted back onto the ground, covering my bruised face in dirt, again.

"I'm so sorry! I should've helped you up to begin with."

They instantly pulled me back up on my feet, supporting me by putting my hand around their shoulders. One of my ankles was sprained, leading not to be able to properly support myself, I definitely needed their help, or I would've had to stay there for a while.

"I hope you don't mind this. I'll get you home. I'm Shirou by the way. Emiya Shirou."

I've basically reimagined this whole story again. That was the when I had first encountered Emiya-senpai. Sounds pretty dramatic for me, but it was just like that. Emiya-senpai… he saved me that day. It wasn't only my life that he had saved, but also my resolve, my understanding on the concept of life. He made me feel alive again. It was… a feeling that came back, a feeling that I had before the incident – the one feeling I cherished the most.

Now I couldn't go back to Tohsaka-senpai on that day yet, so I went somewhere that I would know I could feel at home. After half the way I insisted that my ankle was starting to feel better and that I would be able to walk back myself, but he didn't let me. He was truly worried about me, even though we had just met. How quant of him doubting about me back then, he even is the same right now. He eventually dropped me off at my home, ordering me to not go out during the night and sleep. The only thing after parting that I could do was listen to him. I got a much better rest that night, being alone, finally in a comfortable accommodation.

I… was thinking for a bit after that. Thinking about… everything. The fact that I was making someone caring of me to worry, which was only making it worse. I needed to fix it as soon as I were able to. I needed,,, to correct my mistakes, to possibly… correct my actions and in general… myself, my outlook on existence, another chance possibly.

From there onward, it got better. He came. I didn't expect him to, but he did, and… I was happy that he did. I made another friend, someone who I could rely on, from that day onward, from that one single encounter between the both of us… I had regained a bit of my humanity back.

Once I started feeling better, and coming to the conclusion that it was the right time, I went back, to Tohsaka-senpai. She was the happiest she could be when I came back, being both happy and angry at the same time, not really unusual of her, but for me, she was the most glad she could ever be, I became happy as well, and it was all because of my meeting with Emiya-senpai. He changed me with only a few words and a smile, he was like my own angel.

It got… better, for a while, and I felt happy to be around the new friend that I had made. He would walk me to pre-school everyday while he was at elementary school. I would finish earlier and I would wait for in the spot were we had met, we'd do many things together until sun down, mostly just talk about how our days have been, and pretty much regular child activities, but those were the best to experience, especially with him.

Every single day I would wait until I could meet him again, I could only think about the friend which I had made, Emiya-senpai, I cared about him a lot, I didn't really expect for us to turn out like that, but I was happy that it did, that he wanted to be friends with me, that we… made something, and I could consider him… my friend.

I lived for him. I continued my life for him. Hehe, I'm going to sound like a stalker if I continue thinking like this, but I became the person who I am today because of him… yeah, and then it just… changed with time.

Well guess my resting time is over, my mug is now empty of its previous contents, I took a fairly long one contemplating on the past that I experienced, so I should get to the more important stuff now.

I should hurry up and check. Assassin will be angry with me if I come back later than I told her. Well at the least she's not Tohsaka-senpai, so it would be easier to deal with her.

Now to recheck these bookcases.

… .

… .

… .

Just on the last bookshelf I checked. "The Tale of Perseus". Hmmm… I don't think there will be anything useful in here, but I should still check it, maybe I'll find something just hopefully.

A pretty famous story, Perseus was a Greek hero who is mostly known for slaying one of the Gorgon sisters.

I'm just going through all the pages to see if there is any inscribed pictures in the book that may lead me to something, but it's all just words in this book and no pictures, maybe in the last pages… nope, nothing, dang.

To no avail, oh well, at least it was worth checking, now I know that I couldn't find anything here. Maybe there was another book and someone just took it, but I don't know if that's the case. I guess I'll just have to look it in the books I have at home. There will be something there for sure, sucks that I wasn't able to find another copy in here.

Countless hours spent for no results, I should've really just waited until I came back home, I wasn't going to be dealing with the Master yet anyway today. No changing the past now I guess. I should just finish my things up so that I can leave for the day. It's getting so late, I must be the only one in school at the moment. Thankfully the doors of the school are left open until the evening.

Well, I've done everything I could relating to that. Don't want to come back later than promised, so I should start getting to it, fortunately for me there is no one around which is even better.

Inscribing a seal into a stone is quite a difficult task, especially on such a small one as this one. I'll have to be extra careful with the sigil inscription pen, a little too much magical energy and it will break it. I have a few spare ones but still, better not to waste them and just get it from the start.

Now once I am done I'll be able to leave before curfew which I do not have, but I feel as if I have one. Putting all of my concentration into this, one false misstep and I'll have to…

Luckily that wasn't too much off the sigil path. I don't know if I should take a break, I feel as if my hands are about to be shake uncontrollably, despite me being here completely in solitude with nothing to interfere in this, this precise work is making me nervous I guess, I don't want to screw up.

It's surprisingly turning out pretty well, oh no, my hands, just a bit more.

Done! Transferring Magical energy.

And my little gemstone lens is done. Put it in a safe place so that it doesn't shatter on me – in the cylinder where it is supposed to be with the other five that I did earlier. They all work as well.

Now to just get back home, put this where it belongs and I can present it to Assassin. I hope she'll like it, I worked a lot on it, and I don't want those months of hard work to have gone to waste.

Well if she won't use it, maybe I'll try to give it some use, it should aid us a lot during our progression and possibly future fights. Then again, if she doesn't accept then I'll have to make up an alternative, I promised to have a surprise for her, and she has to accept something from me. Maybe I'll just ask of what she would like.

Guess my work here for today is done, unfortunately nothing on the other Master in the school, only that there is one, and that their plans are malevolent. Assassin is going to totally be interested in this, our first lead. They're probably be more careful with the sigils they set next time, so I'll have to take some kind of precautions to prevent that if possible., they're…

 **Pathetic lowly mild lives that must be exterminated.**

* * *

It's kind of nice walking around in the darkness engulfed halls in the night, with the light of the moon shining through the windows, alone, with nobody around me, kind of creepy though, feeling like in some kind of a supernatural horror movie setting, with the main character being followed around by a spirit with a murderous intent towards them, following every step they take until they can catch them and murder them in the most horrible way possible.

Every turn I take, even if I know of the spirit's presence near me, is mot likely an unavoidable death. It's a spirit after all, and I'm just a lowly human

Actually, now that I think about it, that might just happen. I have no possible idea of what may be going after me, Assassin is just able to prove the fact that such things as spirits exist. What if my enemy is staking me at this right moment as I am making my way to the exit? What if they pounce on me and do terrible things to me, taking their revenge for me taking down their horrible sigils.

I take a quick look over my shoulder – nothing, only a hallway empty of life. No irregularities in the air as well, so no supernatural spirits.

I'm having a sort of thought that maybe it would be nice to share ghost stories with Assassin, curious how she would react to them, she would probably be astonished I made such an unexpected offer, but still, a creepy vibe and environment, that would make a rather fun tea time for the both of us, putting the Holy Grail War aside for at least a bit.

Though I know she's pretty serious with this, so she will want to first focus on finding out the identity of the Master in this school. That should be our obvious goal at the moment. She'll be worried every second I'm at school with an enemy that could come at any second for me, and I'm worried about everyone else in here…

I failed to be more active with others today, so I'm a bit sad about that. I'm… still nervous about it too, and I don't think I'll lose it a bit even until yesterday, Tohsaka-senpai was here today, and I couldn't talk to here because I was scared of it, of my own friend, it's so pathetic of me, haha….

I wasn't even able to meet with Emiya-senpai today, I guess it's for the best, at least for now, I still don't know about what to exactly do about it, I want to, but…

I keep saying that I'll try my best at it, but I'm obviously not trying. What's so hard about talking to someone you know? Even if the circumstances were rather unfortunate, still, you shouldn't be if you know that they will talk back to you… even after the words you had said to them…

I practically told him to forget about me… I'm sorry that I failed you Assassin, but… I guess you are the only friend that I could have at the moment. I'm sorry that I'm such a…

Accelerating footsteps a few meters away to my right, somebody is sprinting around the next hall. What the heck is that? The ghost?

In just a matter of seconds. I am met with the most unexpected being in front of me after jumping back to avoid the collision.

"Senpai? What are you doing out here so late?"

Just as I was thinking about it. He… he's here right in front of me, to that, pretty tensed up, like he's been running for his life. Now I'm instantly worried, what happened to him?

"Gorichi…!"

He grabs me by the hand and starts running to the hall from which I had came, I sprint with him, mildly in confusion and mostly worrisome. There has to be something bad happening, I try to look back to see for anything, but…

"Don't look back! Keep running, don't stop for anything!"

Am interrupted.

* * *

I have no idea where he is planning on running, someone is definitely chasing him with bad intent. I can clearly hear from him that he is losing his breath whilst running for this much.

"Senpai, let's go into the classroom."

He doesn't hear me say that, instead he is keeping on running, I think he plans to go take the different stairs and out of the school. I shake his hand off and he slips off.

"Gorichi, what are you…!?"

"What happened? Senpai, you're scaring me a bit . Who are you running…?"

A flash of red light appears behind him, I can assume what it may be. I jump to him and push him down onto the floor to avoid it.

What was that? I have to get up quickly…

"Good timing, though you should've avoided it, then it would've ended quicker."

A voice which I cannot recognize is being heard from in front of me, I quickly get up from my feet with Emiya-senpai to face the assailant.

Should I face them or continue running? I don't know what they had, it was some long object they had thrusted in, aiming into Senpai's back. If I run they might just throw it at us, and if I do nothing then they'll just attack us again. What the heck am I supposed to do to avoid us getting injured?!

In despair I throw my briefcase at them, hoping that they'll be stumbled and would give us enough time to run in the other direction. I take Senpai's arm and with haste the way we had came.

"Senpai, run in front of me!"

There's still a few ways until the stairs to the first floor, I need another distraction. I need to time this correctly, the door, I quickly open it to hope that our assailant is hit in them since they're running pretty quickly . To no avail, they're still going after Senpai, in time, I manage to push him out of the strike of the long weapon.

"Don't even try running anymore."

If we run, they'll just throw it and we'll be impaled. I stop myself quickly while having Senpai stand behind me. No more running.

Who… what are they?

"Quite exceptional timing and precision you have. If you kept that up you could've possibly managed to at most get to the stairs. Unfortunate for the both of you."

What could've Senpai done to make such a man as this… No, I know who they are, it's no mistake, the amount they have is astonishing, the same to Assassin's. A Servant.

A Servant other than Assassin? Could they possibly be the one setting the sigils in the school building? Whatever the case, this is a quite a horrible situation I am now in.

I'm currently standing in between Shirou-senpai and the assailant, having my back faced to him and with the assailant a few metres from the both of us, readying a spear at us. A spear... Lancer class Servant?

"How unlucky. I would've only needed to kill him if you hadn't been here at the time, and now you're fixated on protecting him."

I'm facing someone who could kill us at any second, and I don't have any idea of what would be a good option. The situation seems hopeless… doesn't matter, I'm not letting this man do anything to Emiya-senpai,

no matter what.

"Gorichi, I'm sorry I got you into this situation, it's… my fault. You quickly run behind me to the stairs while I distract him."

I hear him say it quietly behind me. I will not consider it, I just happened to get myself into this situation of my own accord. Senpai being a sacrificial lamb is out of the question. If needed be… I'll be the one to take that role.

"If you even think about escaping, then it's going to be worse for you."

I am able to feel the air shift as he swings to point that red spear at us, it obviously isn't a simple weapon, one false misstep and it will be over.

"…Why haven't you attacked us yet?"

Rather than being fixed on Senpai, he's been quite observant of me, probably because I am the one they are facing.

"There is something off about you…"

"Are you a Servant?"

From that question they became quite surprised.

"Oh, so you know who I am lass? I knew there was something off about your magical energy that you have, so, you're a Master…?"

Lass!? Who does he take me for?! This man is… well, maybe I could use his mistake in my favour, as crude as that sounds, that factor may just help us.

"You don't have any Command Seals from what I can see. So you're just a magus?"

He continues aiming his spear at me, until it instantly starts shifting to the side, behind me.

"I was only meant to kill your friend behind you since he found out about our existence, you should be able to understand that, even if you aren't an enemy, unless you decide on making yourself one. The boy can't live, though about you…"

…

"You shouldn't pose much of a problem for me, nor should even think about doing it, being myself, I couldn't give in to bruise such a pure maiden such as yourself. I'll grant you the chance to flee for handing him over."

This… this man is truly…! What does he take this situation for and to that he thinks I'm…! I've only just met him, and somehow they are irritating me, be it for wanting to murder Emiya-senpai or think so lowly of me.

I can feel a hand on my shoulder. It's Senpai's. A bit of pressure, he's… trying to push me out of the way…

No! I quickly push him back behind me. What is he even thinking of doing?! Is he… planning on sacrificing himself?! It's stupid… I won't let that happen to him. No… Senpai, I'll protect you from him.

There isn't any other way to escape this. No time to flee, and I'm not sacrificing anyone… I don't know if I am ready for this, and am I actually… willing to.

They're a Servant with a weapon. I am beyond their level of strength, I know that, but still… It's better to try than let him die, and what do I know, how can I trust him to let me… I won't let him get to Senpai… I'll…

My head hurts…

* * *

 _Point of view – Emiya Shirou_

* * *

I can't believe what's happening. Who… is this guy? A Servant? What does Gorichi mean by that?

I… got him into this, and he's standing up for me… why? This is my fault, I have to get away from here. This guy is dangerous, he'll kill the both of us if we stay here defenceless. How he was fighting that other guy in red… he'll easily kill the both of us and we won't be able to do anything. I… have to protect him, I have to.

"Who… who are you?"

…

"Lancer, I'll be more fare, though exposing my identity wouldn't be that beneficial for you lass, nor would it be in my favour. Hey, I'm giving you a pass, just leave the boy to me, you should take it and do me a favour of not having to kill you as well."

"No… I don't need your… help? I don't need it, I'm… grateful, but I can…"

He's panting, and he doesn't seem like he's talking to the guy in front of us. What is happening to him?

"Lancer… I won't leave. If you want to get him… you'll have to kill me first."

…What is he…. Gorichi… Why?

"…How unfortunate…"

Crap, he's going to charge at us. We can't stay here, I have to get him out of here…

He's… holding by my hand… quite firmly, how is his hand grip this firm. Does he not want me to run…!

This is… what is going on…? The so called "Lancer" guy continues standing in front of us, having his weapon readied. I'm actually quite surprised that Gorichi-kun is… now so calm about this, but his hand is shaking, though he himself looks calm. He does something unimaginable with his hands, moving them in different motions in the air, the air shifts, and the matter in the air in front of him forms a contrast of dark colours. Putting his small hand into the matter was completely unexpected on my part, but part of it disappears into the matter, which resembles a… portal I could say. What is he doing…?

Out of the weird sigil- portal that he has made in thin air, he slowly takes out something out by the grip of it, I can only look at it for a second until my eyes start hurting from the colours it emits. Once I upon them, I am surprised to see the item which he is now holding in his hand.

A modified revolver.

He faces a quick glance at me, with a genuine… smile.

"Senpai… please stay behind me… and don't run unless I tell you to. I'll… be returning the favour."

Running now seems pointless, but… Gorichi has a gun aimed at the guy in blue, and he only has a lance with him…

There isn't much doubt about, what Gorichi did just know… proves of it. I never knew about that, I never expected him to be like that.

"I hate to break it to you, but ranged weapons won't work well against me, and, lass, do you really think that you will be able to best me and protect him?

Now he's starting to shake. He's nervous. He can't seriously be going into this, even if it isn't all that I know about him, Gorichi can't take him on. He will just…

"Humpf, you are quite bold for a young mage, determined to protect others as well. I respect that about you, you are truly an interesting specimen, but even with that, you can't possibly think that you will…!"

Right as I try to push him behind me, it happens. He pulled the trigger of it in the middle of the guy in blue talking. It wasn't a normal bullet shot, it wasn't a solid object, the firearm barely did any sound like a normal gun should, wasn't silenced, but something irregular, that shot out a point of mana, denser than that of a normal bullet, with light speed. If the guy was standing only a bit more to his left, his ear, possibly even the whole left side of his head would've been blown off.

The barrel of the gun isn't smoking, obviously not an explosion inside the chamber, he literally shot it out of the barrel right at him. Was it a warning shot, or did he just miss?

He continues shaking vigorously, even slightly more than before. I would probably feel the same, pointing a firearm at someone, despite their intent on killing me, and contemplating whether to take a life to save my own or die without attempting anyway. Taking someone else's life, even if it's the one of this bastard's, it's a hard decision to make.

The "Lancer" guy stays unfazed, not even surprised by that. He probably anticipated it to happen, but predicting that it wouldn't have hit him. This guy is unpredictable. Maybe I can take the gun from him and Gorichi-kun can flee, I can't let him die here with me.

"You missed… you're obviously constricted on what to do, contemplating whether to continue protecting him, and in that, killing me. Even if you hadn't, you wouldn't for hell have got that into me. You are indeed bold lass, but bravery won't mean that you will be able to defeat.

"Lancer…"

I can't believe I missed it. If he wasn't at school, if I only knew that, this wouldn't have happened, he wouldn't have to do this, especially for someone like me.

And the moment I just try to take the weapon for it, it ends, no, it seems more like that it only starts. He won't stop at it,he's already on the task on protecting me, proving this whole time instead of fleeing himself. I would understand that, he would want to protect himself more than me, but it's the opposite of it, he's only in this to protect me, overlooking all the possible exits out of this situation. I put him into this, and now his only task seems to defend me against him.

Only a few centimetres of the handle, and he sprints off. I don't even get to process it instantly, it's the unexpected. We part instantly, his dashing speed leaves me in such a daze that I almost stumble to the ground. I always knew that he was fast on his feet, watching him running on the tract field is a truly nice sight, but catching him in a second for our eyes to see is truly difficult. This is almost as fast as that surge of magical energy that he had shot out of that firearm.

Looking into the front of where they guy in blue stood, I can see the both of them. Gorichi was dashing so fast and instantly, none of us were able to anticipate him running in with a firearm, but it was intentionally a better approach from him, as I can spot from the bottom of the barrel, a spike has been formed. The guy wasn't fazed with him shooting, but running at him with that, especially it being formed into a sharp point weapon, he couldn't for anything predict that, barely dodging it by flailing to the side after as well.

With that kind of speed he doesn't even stumble, dropping onto the floor with one leg while doing a sweep, after that, instantly dashing into the guy while he is still surprised by what just happened.

He was even faster with that dash, if only he didn't have pushed him back my way with his lance, he would've stabbed him right in the head. A spark sounds as their weapons clash, and Gorichi flies my way, rolling onto the ground in the front while the guy is pushed to the window, who seems to get more dazed with every surprise he gets from my underclassmen.

Gorichi comes flying in my way, but still a few metres away, rolling once and as he faces the guy, letting out another shot out of the revolver towards Lancer, but he manages to move to the side and barely dodges it. What surprises is that the window behind him didn't even shatter, despite hitting the surface other than that, Gorichi's unexpected agility. This is unimaginable.

After a second roll he does another swift and charges again, which seems that he is now aiming to break the guy through the window, but he manages to jump out of the way, with Gorichi now flying towards with high speed into the window, but he manages to turn himself foot into the ceiling and with increased momentum, dash into the guy once again.

This is… incredible. His speed and agility is… inhuman, not even expert acrobats or stunt artists would be able to accomplish these sort of stunts, but then it hits me, that he has boosted the lower part of his body with magical energy, which explains the monstrous agility.

Looks as if Lancer is still confused on what is happening right now, at the same time of what to do against him, only trying to dodge his dashes, but Gorichi seems to have realised that as well, having known that his other point blank strike from the spike wouldn't have hit him, he did an unimaginably strong swift kick in the air, which lancer barely manages to block with his spear. He's sent pushed back metres, stumbling, while Gorichi lands back in front of me.

"What the hell is this? How are you so fast for a mage?!"

Ignoring it, without even a millisecond to spare, he dashes again, this time for an upper-cut kick, but Lancer manages to block it with the handle of his lance, though sent a bit back. Now Lancer looks irritated, trying to swipe at him with his lance up close with the handle, but Gorichi's quick reflexes save him with a front-flip.

Perhaps he expects that with enough dashes, he might land a hit on him, but what will having impaled him with such a small spike do exactly.

"What is the meaning of this? Some kind of sorcery is it lass? It'll say I never expected this, seems that I'll have to take you seriously then."

Lancer wasn't acting much on it, but if he is now, I don't think Gorichi can hold him as good. If that guy in red had a difficult time, how can he…

I guess I shouldn't underestimate his abilities, with having seen all of these surprises that he just did right in front of me, with that sort speed he could probably dodge him all night, to that, he doesn't waste a second when fighting him, dashing again and this time, shooting in various directions hoping to hit Lancer. The amount of shots he is able to do in a s few seconds is incredible, he even manages to have one tear through Lancers suit as he tries dodging it.

Another low upper-kick as he lands? No, this time he swipes his leg, which should be harder to block, but Lancer manages to dodge it by jumping back, only to get hit with a follow-up twist kick to the shoulder, being sent to the wall in not so hard of a hit, but still that should've hurt even him, despite Gorichi being so small in size compared to him, his lower waist is rather large and strong in build, not even adding up the charge of magical energy.

Lancer's dazed on the wall, even after stating that, it still doesn't seem as if he is taking this fight more seriously. What reason must he have to hold out on Gorichi… well, maybe he thinks that he is a girl, couldn't really blame him.

"Hehe… Truly fast."

Trying to aim for another shot, the guy swings his lance Gorichi's way, but he manages to block the strike with his revolver, though the force pushes him, he performs a cartwheel and dodges the strike, landing on his feet. Taking back those words, Lancers definitely now trying to attack him, now dashing towards him with the point of his lance.

"Gah…!"

"Gorichi!"

The point didn't hit him, but that strike he did not expect, and it sent him sliding to the side of the wall. I begin sprinting towards him, if he is vulnerable, Lancer will kill him, I have to distract him with something

Lancer aims for another point strike towards him, but with the most amazing thing, Gorichi blocks it with the firearm on the pint, stumbling Lancer. He quickly positions himself and performs a leg-sweep, which hits him!

Lancer manages to recover from his fall, now crouching, and Gorichi tries aiming for his head to shoot, but Lancer shoves his lance towards him, missing the shot.

They're now facing each other. Also… I know Lancer aims for killing him, but Gorichi… it's obvious that now he is truly fighting him, and in that, trying to kill him. Before he was anxious about it, but now, he looks more into it than before, and that is all for the reason of protecting me…

Damnit! He's fighting the guy trying to protect me while I stand and do absolutely nothing. He's risking his life for me, and I… have done nothing for him. Yesterday, my pathetic attempt of asking him to walk with me. Of course he wouldn't want to, I couldn't exactly understand what he meant by saying that, but it doesn't matter, it's that I didn't even try to persuade him, because I was weak at the time being in front of him after barely ever talking to him before, and now he's on the task of protecting me, risking his life.

The clash of weapons is mixed in the air, until that one opening. Instead of aiming for his opponent, Gorichi turns the barrel and aims it at the floor, shooting something that formed into a symbol on the floor where Lancer would next stop on. Once his leg lands on it, an electrical discharge shocks him, leaving him dazed for a moment. Gorichi manages to hit him in the side where his suit was torn, impaling him with the spike.

"I'm sorry…"

He twists it further, pulling the trigger.

Another site that leaves me in a bit more unsettled position. Blood… it isn't much, but the discharge of magical energy from once the spike entered Lancer's body covered some of the floor in it. He finally managed to hit him. Lancer stumbles back defenceless, and Gorichi points the barrel right at his head. A sense of relief fills me, until…

"Heh, you finally got a hit in me…"

Even in that sort of instant state, Lancer still manages to push his lance to the front, though Gorichi did not expect that, having blocked it with his weapon. Counter it…!

In the end, Lancer was quicker with his attacks, even when fighting Gorichi-kun, he said so himself that there is no way that he could best him. Of course I didn't believe in what he had said, but it was only what seemed to be the truth.

Swiping his lance, he hits Gorichi on his shoulder, pushing him to the wall, ramming his head into the trophy case which was conveniently positioned there. His head rams right through the glass pane and into the shelf with the multiple positioned trophies on it.

He's not moving…

My only only reaction would be to run to him, which I do. I start sprinting with every being of my body to him, aiming to protect him from the bastard who did it to him. I had to only protect him from them. Gorichi… he had protected me, fighting against him for such a reason, I have to…

* * *

 _Point of view:Matasa Gorichi_

* * *

I… I wasn't quick enough to counter. I landed face first into the cabinet, I think I also cut my head somewhere, and… I can't move… I have to move, or Senpai will.

He was just running, I heard it. I told him to stay back, but he didn't. Was he worried about me, he shouldn't have, he couldn't possible protect me from Lancer. I can't move myself for some reason, and I can't hear him running anymore.

 **Protecting such a lowly being was a false goal of you. They themselves wanted you to flee, yet you didn't do it. Even if your wish is kind, it was idiotic, which may as well lead to the death of both.**

No… I have to protect Senpai… no matter what. He can't do anything against them on his own… I'll... defeat them, just not make the same mistake I did. I won't.

I… I have to get myself out. My head is bleeding, and I can't move much. I can hear squirming and… something falling.

"Sorry, but it only had to be done. Dead men tell no tales and all that."

Lancer… what did you do? I have to get out… my hands, my head hurt. Senpai… please run… run away… leave me, I'll defeat him no matter what, and then… Lancer…!

"Tsk, you really do make me do some really nasty stuff. A hero doing things like these is ridiculous."

I can't sense him. He's gone. Why is he gone? Why did he leave? Senpai, that's it, I have to have my body react to something. A piece of broken glass, it'll hurt, but I have to or…

I got a cut on the hand, but I still continue to… stab it into my thigh. It hurts, but I manage to move myself.

"Senpai…!"

As I had felt it. Lancer had fled from the scene Leaving without even killing me, did he think that he had beat me? And then that…

… No… No…No…!NO!

"SENPAI!"

He stabbed him. He stabbed him in the chest, in the heart I think. Blood everywhere. A pool of blood.

"Senpai! Please, say something!"

I check his hand, no pulse, he pierced his heart. He pierced his heart with his lance and now there's a bleeding hole in it. It's still bleeding.

"Senpai! No, please, you can't die…! No, I won't… Please just wake up, I'll help you, you can't just die here, please."

My hands… they're covered in his blood, it's still warm. I almost feel like screaming, but it's warm. His blood is still warm… No, I have to stay calm and sane, I have to do something, I can't let him die like this, here, such a horrible way, think of a way. I have to heal it someway. Will Healing magic be enough to repair a pierced heart, it stopped beating, but I have to try, I have to try!

"Don't… I won't let you die here, please… wake up…. WAKE UP!"

"I have to put in everything I have into this. Every last bit of mana that I have, I have to, I have a lot, it has to be the least enough, I'll put in everything as long as he lives, just please caught, breath or something, start beating, I won't stop until something happens.

Tears are starting to fall on my hands. I can't let that be or it'll get worse, I have to stop, but I can't, I have to do it no matter what, just stop crying!

… **Pointless…**

"Please… don't leave me. Senpai, I don't want you to leave like this, I failed, but I don't want you to die. I beg of you, don't leave me like this… Shirou… Shirou… please don't… Remember that time when we first met. You saved me, so let me repay you, just let me repay for everything you did back then. Don't leave me alone again…!"

I'm starting to get fatigued the more mana I put it, but I can't stop, I have continue doing this, even if it kills me… it's not working.

If… I can save him like this? It'll kill me. I don't care, as much as I need to, I will do it even if it hurts, even if it's unbearable. I won't let him die. Senpai… I will never give up…!

"Who's there!?"

I have to continue this with my one hand. If that bastard's still here, I'll…

"Tohsaka…senpai…"

At the end of the hall, you can't mistake that silhouette. It's her.

"Tohsaka-sennpai, you have to help me! He's dying. We can't let him die, just please help me…!"

I said so… I would put in everything I had into saving him, even more if possible, anything at all… anything. But I wasn't careful enough. I let my guard down, thinking that, but… I did not expect to faint from something else.

* * *

 _Interlude_

* * *

I… never had expected such a thing to happen to me. Feeling as if my fate was sealed and inescapable, only awaiting until I finally have ended for the sake of others, but instead… I was saved.

Heh, thinking all that time that it was useless, that I deserve it, and out of nowhere someone comes to change my point of view on it. Give me a reason to continue on living. It… sounds a bit sad, but to me it was a rather happy thing to experience. It had been a long time, no, probably ever since I felt something like that… for someone else. It was different than when I first met Tohsaka-senpai, not like it was a bad thing or anything, I was glad to ever had met her, she did help me a lot, and I was grateful for it, it's just that Emiya-senpai… gave me something that no one could really have given to me. At the moment then, I could say that from there on out, he was my angel. Heh, what a title to give someone, but yes, that is what I think he was to me.

I guess I could also say that I had become a lot different than before meeting him. It was like… I had become more positive, more aware of what I had, that I only wanted to do the right thing – the best thing that I could do, but mostly – to rely, and be with Emiya-senpai. He had become an important friend to me who I couldn't possibly lose, but, unfortunately…

But with my personality change, even if it was a bit, I had actually went back to live with Tohsaka-senpai. I was living at her home before that, because she wouldn't have wanted me to live alone at my home, and I was rather… unaware of having a decision at the time, but after of course first meeting Emiya-senpai, I realised it – Tohsaka-senpai wanted the best for me, she was so glad when I came back, that was the one time ever I could see her cry so much, also the quite scary and angry side of her. I deserved it though, after that, we both became better about it, with each other, we became more active together, something that I had missed out for a long time, I became even more happy then.

I did tell her about Emiya-senpai, but didn't really go into details of how we met, but she probably thought that me meeting him definitely changed me for the better, that I finally came back to her. In that, I finally had made two good friends that I cared so much for, even though I had to work with each of them apart.

The times I had with Emiya-senpai… were precious. For those couple of months, they were indeed valuable, getting to hang out, talk, spend time together, possibly were the best that I could have. That was part of my reason to keep on living – to have someone so important to me, someone to protect, the one person who saved me from my demise – Emiya-senpai.

And I knew, that whatever would've really happened, I would be the one to defend him. I owed him.

They had came back to the spot where it had happened before, while me and him were playing as usual like the children that we were – experiencing and... living, I guess.

They were back ,after only a couple of months. I anticipated that they would return, but as it got later and later, I had lost the thought of it ,that they couldn't possibly return, but this time there was one more in their numbers.

Senpai said that he wouldn't want me to get hurt again, saying that he would deal with them himself, at least that's what I thought he said, and I had ignored it, and began walking towards the ones that had used me as their planned sacrificial lamb.

I wasn't scared of them to begin with. The one thing that I wanted to know is why they had came back - to take their revenge on me? To finish unfinished business. I… only was planning on finding out, and then thinking of what to do. I had approached them with confidence, and one of them actually armed with a makeshift spear made from a long branch, but I didn't mind it.

"Hello."

They stayed in silence, staring at me with eyes that seemed to be filled with hatred and contempt, but most of them, they were staring as if at something behind me.

"You thought that you could just have your prince save you? Thought that we wouldn't leave you alone after that?"

The one holding the makeshift spear seemed to be the most talkative one, as it also as before.

"Um…"

"You're going to be like that again, a stupid little confused kid?!"

"No. Why did you come back?"

"What do you think our reason is. We want to finish what we had started, before that jerk interrupted us. Even if he is older, I'm prepared to make the both of you have your little ends come with one another."

What they said put me in a shock. Reliving the past again, with them coming back, after me, but no, once I heard their contempt towards him, I had become distressed then. My heart started pounding hard in my small chest, and I began sweating and shaking uncontrollably.

"But we know he'll just get in the way of us dealing with you. So get out of our way."

"..no… NO!"

They were already starting to march behind me, but I stood firm, trying to not them pass, even pushing some two with my minor strength back.

"Please… don't hurt him. Just end it with me, just don't hurt him."

"Heh, you really want to die that much huh? Then take it!"

Before I knew it, I felt a sharp pain in my left shoulder. The one with the crafted spear inserted it into me, not too much, it was more like a poke that pierced into my skin. They instantly took it out and aimed for the same spot again, pricking it even further. My clothes were starting to get bloody, but, it was not surprising, this was what I had experienced before, so I was used to it, even after a while of not having to experience it again, and this time, I just had more of a reason to endure this pain, these multiple stabs into the shoulder.

"Hey! What the heck are you doing!?"

If only that had ended quicker, but could've I trusted them to stay to their words? To just lay their problems out on me and end it, and just left him be. I wouldn't mind that, as long as that had a purpose to happen.

"Oh my god… What the heck is wrong with you?! Are you all right?"

He ran to me as I was about to fall from the pain in my chest, there was more blood than it ever was before, but I was still conscious. He grabbed me and supported me until I had regained myself. If only he had stayed this, it would've just ended.

"Don't interrupt us!"

Another stab, much further than the others were. I got a glimpse of Senpai looking traumatized to see what he was experiencing. I didn't want him to witness it.

"You jerk!"

With speed, he started to dash at the one who was stabbing me relentlessly, aiming for a punch in the face. Even though they were younger than Senpai, they were still able to punch him in the stomach before anything he could've done. I… didn't even care about the deep stab that was in my chest anymore.

"I told you not to interrupt us… now you can be the first one to die!"

I was now staring at the one, punching Senpai vigorously with everything she had with her one hand. And with her other hand, trying to insert the pike into him, from what I saw, at his chest.

I was traumatized to see it, to see the one person precious to me, after trying to protect him, saving me again, when I didn't want him to.

"Matasa, get away!"

I could only look at their struggle. I… got him into my mess, when I didn't even want to. I was seeing him, being relentlessly punched over and over again, his face bruised, and being about to be stabbed. I had lost all emotion to what I was experiencing, until I heard it.

 **Exterminate the sinners.**

The two of the group started to hold me in place by holding my hands. I didn't struggle with them. I… started feeling a bit of anger, but not the exaggerated type. I stomped the one's on my left foot with all my force that he let go instantly. After that, rammed my elbow back to the one's on my right stomach, finally becoming free from their dirty grasps, and slowly started walking towards them with only one intent.

Once I got close to her, grabbed her by the behind of her shirt and without much strength, tore her off from Senpai, this time with changed positions. She was faced down on the floor, while I was on top of her, holding her hand firmly with mine, and also getting that twig out of her hand.

"What the hell do you think you're doing? Guys, help me!"

The new one which I had never seen before started running, while the other two who held me where still recovering from my hits on them. I didn't really have much of a hate for them, more for the girl who was now underneath me. Having that pathetic skinny branch in my hands, I threw it towards them, not exactly at them, but at the ground near their feet, right next to them. If they had run a bit faster, that would've went right into their foot. He immediately ceased sprinting.

Taking a quick glance at Senpai, I was horrified to see his now injured face – bruised everywhere, and even some cuts in some places.

"I thought that you wouldn't have hurt him… I thought that you only needed me… I said to leave him out of it…"

It became as before, I wasn't really able to feel much at the time. But that once, I felt… powerful.

"Ok, I'm sorry. Let me go you jerk!"

"You hurt him, even though you said that you wouldn't… I think that what you did to him is equivalent to three of your fingers."

Once I had grabbed her and taken her off of Senpai, I had conveniently taken her by the fingers. My hands were wrapped around them, and slowly, I started to pull them upward, all three of her middle fingers.

"No, please, I'm sorry, stop it, it hurts. Help me!"

I thought that it would be harder, but they started bending inwards so easily, I was astonished. I bended them and bended them, until…

*Crack*

Her screams of pain started resonating in my ears. Such a pathetic girl, this was only little of what she had deserved after what she had done to Senpai. I thought about pulling another one, she started crying and looked so pathetic. She deserves more pain after that.

"Matasa…!"

Hearing him calmed me down a bit. I wanted to bend her thumb as well, but having Senpai experience such a sight even more… I couldn't let him witness that again, besides, I had to tend to his wounds.

"If you ever come back here, I'm going to break every bone in your body until you're nothing but an ugly ragdoll, same goes for your friends.

"He's… he's… crazy. I'm sorry…"

Her pathetic panting started giving me such a headache, finally felt glad getting off from her and dashing towards Senpai. From what I could hear they were leaving, with the one with the broken fingers continuing panting.

"Gorichi is crazy… he's crazy."

They had finally left. If they came back here, I would've perhaps made sure that they had never left. They hurt Senpai so much, I would never want to see their ugly disgusting faces ever again.

"Shirou, I'm sorry you had to grow through that, especially seeing the things after. Let me take care of you."

His face was bruised all over, but from a closer look, the blood was only coming from a slight scratch. At the time I only had a clean napkin, so I used that to cover it.

"I don't need it, you're bleeding. There's so much blood coming out from your shoulder, you should have it."

"It doesn't matter, don't worry, it doesn't hurt, seeing you hurt like this hurts more, I'm… sorry."

I was about to cry, but making the situation worse would've had a worse result, basically, a bad time to cry, luckily I managed to hold myself in and not cover the blood on my clothes with tears as well.

"I think we should end it for today, I didn't really expect this to happen. You should get home and treat that as soon as possible, oh Kiritsugu-sama will be so mad at me."

"Don't worry, it isn't your fault, it's their fault, besides, you… stood up to them, so I'm proud of you Matasa."

Well, it did turn out better, could've ended in a much worse manner.

"Matasa, what she had said… she kept referring to you as 'he'"

"Hm? Yes, but I didn't really care much for that."

"Well… why did she say 'he'?"

"Shirou, you shouldn't care what she had said after what she did to you. Make her the least of you concerns, she's not going to come back… I'm a boy after all, that's what she should've said. Anyway, let's go before that injury get's worse. Shirou, why are you looking at me like that?"

Looking at his face made me feel so sad. So many injuries, with that, he looked rather confused at me, puzzled. Maybe he had a concussion from the punches? That I had thought, but no, it was the truth that he had found out about, about… me.

"I'm… gonna go back by myself. You should too, it… would still be best if Kiritsugu didn't see you with me, you are right about that."

"Are you sure, well them let's meet again tomorrow, same time, and don't worry this time, if they come back, I'll make them leave and never return."

"Yeah… I'm sure of that… goodbye, Matasa."

Least that I would've known, the moment he set his back on me, that was the last time he would set it on me, and me not seeing him again after that.

Coming back the next day, I had expected him to come, but he didn't. I waited for a few hours, thinking that maybe he was just busy with something else of which I didn't know off, but night came, and he hadn't. Only thing I could really do was wait again tomorrow. Senpai didn't exactly say where he had lived, nor did he say what school he was attending, we didn't go to the same. I had nowhere to look, just wait for him. Every day, near that tree where we had met, near that where everything so life-changing had happened.

I didn't want to abandon that thought, thinking of various reasons why he couldn't have come, why he was absent on all of those days, believing that he would come, and it would be like before, like it always was, both of us spending time together.

A month passed, and I was still waiting, happily, thinking about him coming, but he didn't, though someone did come.

"So this is where you have been staying? You could've told me. Well it's getting dark, so come on, let's go."

Emiya-senpai… it had hit me, that… what we did have, was in fact a friendship of ours, at least I had believed it, but… maybe the reason that I was saved that day, was that it was made to happen on purpose, and I just kind of, pushed it into actually happening. Anyway, Emiya-senpai did leave me, I knew that, realised that he wouldn't come anymore, he was just there, for the time, to make me realize that I had finally made my reason on living – for other people, for Tohsaka-senpai, and for him.

"Yes, let's go."

I didn't feel sad realising it. After all, even if that was the case, I would only know one thing.

That Shirou was still my friend, even if he didn't think like that anymore.

* * *

 _Present_

* * *

A change of position finally awakens me. It's… my head hurts a bit. Where…

The park? What am doing here? I was just… where was I, and what am I exactly doing here, laying on the bench alone in the middle of the night.

Emiya-senpai… he was… we were. He's still at school, no, I have to get to him as soon as possible…

Well falling from the bench doesn't seem like the best way to it. It hurts, that stab with the glass I had inflicted on myself, it's still bleeding a bit, I won't be able to move much like this. I have to heal it quickly, I have to get to him.

… I'm going to faint if I use too much, and then it will be for nothing, I used up too much mana on him back there… no, I can't think about it, he can't have just…

I managed to at least stop the bleeding, it hurts less, but still, I'll have to limp my way to school.

I would've had a much easier time getting here if I didn't have this limp. I guess I should be glad I got here at all, it should be in the next hall. No… if he's still there, then…

Where Emiya-senpai should be lying, now there is just a pool of blood, his pool of blood. No… where is he? There is blood further away from the pool, meaning that his body was moved somehow. Is he… still alive?

I… did I manage to save him? No, even though I tred most of what I can, Healing magic wouldn't be able repair a stabbed heart, but how is he then…?

It doesn't matter, he's alive, Emiya-senpai is alive. I don't know how, but he is.

…Seeing this much blood, and knowing who it had belonged to, it's horrible to look at….

This sure is a mess around here. I have to get to him, but I can't leave this pool of blood here. People coming in the morning will obviously report this, not to mention the broken trophy case. I'll have to clean this mess up, luckily the janitors closet is right next to here. Repairing the trophy glass pane will be a bit difficult with this low of mana, but I'll try at it.

I've been walking so much with a limp, I'm terribly exhausted, almost to the point of fainting onto the ground, but I have to keep on moving, the one place I could think that Senpai would've gone is back to his house. I can't leave him alone, and I have to see if he's all right.

Lancer might come back for him, knowing that he had survived. I'm not in any condition to fight him, so I can only make a distraction for Senpai to escape, if not, I'll… do whatever I have to. Even thought that is unlikely to happen, I won't stop at protecting Emiya-senpai.

This is his house. The light's are on! Someone is inside there. Is it him?

I… can sense a large amount of magical energy coming from inside the building. A Servant! I can't exactly tell if it's Lancer, but it's definitely a Servant.

I won't be able to fight them head on. All I can do is either sneak or make a distraction, I have to first find out.

… Didn't think that I would've needed to use this. Fighting, didn't think I would result to it, but I did, I fought a Servant on my own, and I somehow didn't die. I should've, but I didn't, I couldn't be that lucky, Lancer held back, eventually also sparing me. I doubt the next will be any easier.

A few shots until I pass out from the low mana capacity, not enough if I don't hit the head, have to be careful, my chances of surviving a Servant are slim now, but I don't care, I won't let him die. Need to get in carefully.

It's getting stronger, I'm definitely getting close to the source of it. If I can get close to them…

They sensed me! Dang. My leg, can't.

I fell, they's right in front of me. The Servant. I managed to point my weapon in front of them, I can sense their weapon being swung at me.

Pull...

The…

 **Your chances of survival are slim as thread, though your determination is exemplary. Boldness… it will prove your worthiness. It's utterly ridiculous, then again, has fate been at all fare to you? No, it hasn't, it's unfair. Fate is never invincible to everyone, whatever it may lead to, the results will be either bad or good. Humans… pathetic beings that seek only for themselves… selfishness… yes…**

 **The sins of the world shall meet their end…**

 _Introduction End_


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